AIBU to refuse to change the car battery given my caring duties?

All women are high earners? Really? Maybe tell that to all shop workers, care workers and hospitality staff then

By earning enough money to outsource stuff like this to other people!

I'm not sure why you think EVERYONE has fancy conputerised new cars. On the roads there are everything from 02 plate fiestas to brand new jags. Bearing in mind the original battery should last 3 years or more at minimum then I'd say a greater percentage of cars that need battery changes shouldn't be needing " reprogramming"

Sorry I'm late to this party...

Car batteries have got more efficient and lighter in general, so it might not be that it's not heavy. It will only fit one way around and hence you couldn't connect it up wrong. Plus although you may get some sparks as you connect the second lead, the 12V won't give you a dangerous shock.

However, if your car has stop - start you'll have a beefier battery. If it's a hybrid again it has a much heavier battery. If it's PHEV I wouldn't mess with it as some have quite dangerous voltages on the second (hybrid) battery.

The other complications is some cars need a security code for the entertainment system after the battery has been disconnected.

So the answer is it depends.

It is easy to fit but the computer will need resetting so best to get a garage to do it.

It takes them 5 minutes because that's how long it takes. I did mine the other day, I do it about once every 5 years. Still takes me 5 minutes.

I'm not saying it's unreasonable for the OP to take it somewhere and get someone else to do it if she's busy and not confident, just that it's not really something that gets massively faster the more you do it, it's just undoing and redoing a few bolts.

I know what it’s like, I care for a severely disabled family member along with my own 7 kids all on my own, one in a wheelchair and one with severe ASD and developmentally delayed, I was also carer for 2 grandparents before they died. I change my own car batteries because it’s not brain surgery it’s a 5 minute job, I could pay someone but why waste money on a simple job? Grown adults in here acting like they’re incapable f doing simple tasks just because they care for people and yet they’d be the very ones complaining about “kids of today” 😏

I have 7, I raise them single handily, 2 with disabilities, one severely autistic with development delay who cant be left unattended and also carer for a family member, you don’t need talent to change a car battery, just common sense and 5-10 minutes of your time!! I’ve no idea how the hell it took 3 of you to change it last time. I’m sure you’ve lifted a baby, it’s the same weight so why couldn’t even ONE of you lift a battery? It’s loosening the clamps, taking old battery out, new one in, tighten clamps. That’s it!! You’re making out like you’re so hard done by because you have kids a job and caring responsibilities for others, that’s not the “hard done by” situation you seem to think it is, neither is my situation, simple jobs need done, you’re acting like the whole damn engine needs replaced not just a battery 😂

Well yes so can I afford to, but I’m not lazy and incompetent so prefer to not throw unnecessary money away for nothing!!

I agree on all counts.

My late husband told me that he used to be confident enough to work on his previous cars, but not the more modern ones.

Our last car is a 2017 VW. Even after his stroke, DH was able to talk me through some things - e.g fitting and tightening a chain on a new chainsaw. He told me he wouldn't have a clue about changing the battery in the car, given all the electronic stuff these days.

The RAC chap who came to do it for me apparently had to be careful of various systems and so on.

At one point, I was working full time and looking after three adults. When it came to certain tasks around the house (and car), I figured that I was safer leaving it to someone who knew what they were doing.

I can manage to screw bits of wood together, etc using a power drill and I can manage to use a cordless hedgecutter without causing mayhem.

@Kardelen Well do I remember the stress of trying to deal with everything as well as caring.

Well if you can do it but just CBA it's laziness. If you can't do it then as the PP states it would be "uselessness"

My laziness kicks in with mowing the lawn I can do it but rather not so get someone else to

Good for you! 🤜🤛

So let me get this straight, to add to the list of

competitive undereating
competitive overeating
competitive bin management
competitive cleaning - particularly the 'deep clean'
competitive kids clubs/extra curricular activities

We now have, competitive battery changing and car maintenance.

I've jotted it down.

Depends on the car. I take mine out to charge up at least.once a year. Never had issues. Easy to book online with Halfords though.

I've used my local garage in the past. It's something I feel better at getting someone else to do.

Laziness? Depends on what you understand by that.
I have better things to do, for sure. Which can include but are not limited to work, active hobbies, various errands. If that sounds lazy to you, then absolutely.

So just laziness rather than uselessness then

We are not useless, we just can afford to and prefer to pay someone else to do it.

Yet the weekend kids at halfords can do this amazingly complicated stuff.. my son's friend had a weekend job there. He was shown how to fit bulbs and wipers and left to get in with it. Certain cars ( assume the ones that are actually complicated) they don't do

I'm not particularly talented. Just didn't have any other. Bugger to do stuff for me and no money to throw away getting it done

We do most things ourselves on the cars but we cant even change the bulbs in one of them because the amount of dexterity and strength needed to get the headlamps off, you literally need 3 hands each with 20 fingers to try to get purchase on it, its impossible for us

So for a simple bulb change, we have to take it to the garage.

Maybe - DF is spectacularly useless on anything practical so that could be true. But cars did used to be more straightforward as well, I am pretty sure the maintenance system on mine which operates the radio locks out if the battery is taken out and only the garage has the code.

Regardless @Kardelen you are right caring for adults is harder than DCs and you have my sympathies.

Be very careful with halfords fitting

Maybe this is more of a younger generation thing then? I am a couple of decades older than you, and we would always do this kind of simple maintenance stuff. We were taught by our Dads to be more self sufficient and thereby save money.