AIBU to think my husband‘s attitude is really mean

I'd not take the time out my day for it either, it's not mean to not want to do something especially for someone you don't know.

Wasn't someone on Mumsnet asking for two witnesses to her wedding for the end of this month?

When I got married we had to register our witnesses in advance.

Have you MET Mumsnetters??😂

If everyone says no we are planning on calling for two taxis to wait to take us back - so they can be the back up witnesses 🤣

We're driving 9 hours to the wedding location so we can't really ask a friend!

I definitely would

I’d do it like a shot. It would be fun!

Not me. I had an extremely basic wedding but I still made sure there were witnesses for the day.
In fact, if people do only see it as a legal formality you're going to be more organised about such things, not less.
Like I said I'd be OK with it if at a loose end, I would, however think Jeez how disorganised are these people. Lol.

I wouldn't fear any repercussions for myself from it and I might do it if at a loose end, I would, however, think the couple were truly unorganised people unless there was a real urgency to the marriage.
I mean crikey what a risk to take, what if nobody said yes?

This is MN, where everyone you haven't known for at least 50 years is up to no good and wants to steal your soul

There was a wedding a few years ago where mumsnetters were the witnesses, found on here and arranged on a thread.
I remember it was quite lovely to read.

People do this every day. My parents asked passers by and they were delighted to be asked! The registry office did say they have staff do it too sometimes.

I would do it and be happy to do it!! I think unexpected things like that are the best things in life!

We were looking at our local register office. The rules there are staff cannot do it under any circumstances and you can’t ask people off of the street. As we don’t have two witnesses irl we haven’t got married.

Each to his own. My OH is allowed to have his priorities and choices on how he spends his time. Luckily, his priority is us as a couple and family...but I wouldn't force my choices on him.

This is exactly my plan for my elopement next month 🤣 I'm hoping to find someone at one of the nearby cafes/parks as it is a morning weekday wedding so only spoons will be open at the time!

It’s literally nothing like that 😂 it wouldn’t be joining in, it would be actively cancelling your original plans.

It’s a personal thing. I’m always up for something different, not everyone is, which is why I suggested he’s not actually being mean.

Your reading comprehension skills are somewhat lacking.
I said that the witnesses job is to attest that the marriage took place. That's it, they have no other job.
Minimising the risk of fraudulent marriages is part of the work done in the register office, where the parties to the marriage must register their intent to get married, with sufficient notice, and to whom the couple have to present their ID, proof of address, proof of immigration status and proof that any previous marriages are legally over. The register office have a duty to report suspicious requests to the Home Office, and they do report thousands of cases a year.

I got married in Gretna just the two of us. I got the photographer to be one witness and we pulled a wee woman from the street who was away to do her shopping in to local coop. She gladly listened to the quickest vows, signed her name on the forms and off she popped. She was the cutest wee woman ever and we were very thankful x

YANBU, it's a bit of a spoilsport attitude, like the kind of man who won't join in with charades or a new board game at Christmas and just sits there while everyone else plays...

Oh great to know it still happens sometimes. I'm 'actual' friends now with some MNers I met by doing this years ago. (I was a witness not the bride)

You know what? I'd love to do it for someone. Unless I had an urgent appointment or somewhere I really had to be (e.g. picking kids up from school) then yes. It's such a lovely, important day for a couple, and presumably they have their reasons for wanting to get married quietly. I'd be honoured, tbh. Most days I am not doing anything so special that I couldn't take 15 minutes to help out. Mumsnet has turned into a sad and miserable place, I wonder if that's a reflection of society in general post-covid in particular. The kindness of strangers can be a wonderful thing. Totally paranoid to start going on about sham marriages - and ignorant too.

No, it's not mean. If people opt for that approach to getting witnesses, they have to be prepared that a potential consequence will be not being able to find them on the day.

I don’t think it’s mean either, I’d do it, I’d not be all scared if was a scam or repurcussions, mumsnetters do appear a rather nervous bunch, but I’d also equally not think someone mean for not disrupting their day to do it.