Husband not coming home early

And?

...

and what did she say?

That would take time to arrange, even if they agreed to do it. They’d probably say she needs to go to A&E.

Did you phone your GP surgery?

You should have spoken to your GP practice and asked for a DN to come out and look at it.

I agree your DP/DH is being a massive dick, but advocate for yourself please! It's your leg thats going to go necrotic/gangrenous/fall off... not his!

OP, I’m sorry. Your leg looks very painful.
please impress upon your husband the need for him to travel back now. It doesn’t appear to me that the work he was doing couldn’t be postponed. If your wound has opened that much then I would imagine you have been doing too much. What was your hospital aftercare advice?

His not leaving tonight is he. Tomorrow night ready for your Friday appointment as was always the plan he had.

That's really what you would do? I am sorry for you. My DH would wait with the kids or come back to get me.

OP you need urgent care. You could get very unwell from that

The original post was obvious about the attitude of her husband imo.

That will take too long. In the circumstances the GP surgery would tell her to go to A&E. The district nurse should then be arranged for the days after she gets home

Ask GP practice for district nurse, to at least visit & redress wound? Or even in extreme circumstances our GP practice does home visits.

Oh yes I get that being a tiler but doing it for a family member while you stay at your sisters, meet up with friends and go hang out with your dad isn’t work work.

The job itself depending on size could have been done in a day or two max during his normal work hours, The rest is a jolly.

Also if his doing it on mates rates again it’s more a favour than again work work.

If he was doing the job for anyone else he would be earning his normal wage and of been home faster rather than it becoming a family fun week.

I mean sleeping till 11am isn’t getting the job done is it.

I think you’re being a bit harsh - if he’s working away then he can’t just drop everything one evening and chuck two young kids in the car to drive through the night for 6 hours…?

No idea why he was still in bed until 11 though if he’s there for work? Wouldn’t he need to be at work way before then? So he’s being unreasonable not to set off first thing today with the kids.

But you’re being unreasonable again about the not staying at hospital - what do you actually expect him to do with 5 kids under 10 in a hospital for hours and hours? You’ll have to just figure out a way home after - there will be taxis at a hospital and even if you live in the middle of nowhere you’ll have to stomach the expense.

Your husband is an arse. You need to get your leg checked out asap. Once he's home, I would book yourself into a hotel, without him and the kids for some proper recovery time.

And then I would have a come to Jesus talk with him upon your return. And I would match his energy forever more. Only give him what he's willing to give you.

Yeah he is an arse op.

He left you after surgery to go do a mates rates job for a family member five hours away leaving you unable to drive and I assume that steady on your feet with the youngest. His an arse alone for that. The job could have waited till you were car able again. His using it as an excuse for a family meet up and chill.

His very oh well attitude to that puss and yuk on your leg is terrible as well even if you didn’t have children at home.

I thought you meant he actually had to go to work and was wondering how he wangled taking some of the children but his not working really is he. His not making his normal wage on a floor job.

Sorry I wasn’t having a go, I was just responding to the poster that started her comment “to the harsh commenters” but imo if you leave out key info then it’s not our fault if we don’t know the full picture, obviously your update shows you’re not in the wrong x I hope you manage to get your leg checked. Have you phoned 111 and ask for a home visit?

FWIW it's worth OP, I felt you received a lot of judgemental relies which lacked in empathy. I was confused by the focus on driving and actually read back your posts to see where this was coming from but I think people were just making assumptions. Personally, I hadn't thought you couldn't drive or refused to learn, just thought clearly you can't at the moment due to your surgery which could happen to anyone.

For me, your original post was enough to get the jist and see that your husband didn't really seem to be treating your situation with any urgency or much concern. You've had surgery, you're in pain and on your own with young children and if at all possible he should be putting your well being first and that's what this is about, not where you live or how many DC you have. It sounds like the work he is doing is relatively flexible, and he could be changing plans since you need him urgently. Surely that's what marriage is about, caring about each other?

Anyway, I hope you get that wound seen to asap and it heals up soon.

When you leave out key info and drip feed it changes opinions,