How long is acceptable to be off work

The day they died (if during the previous night meaning not enough sleep or got the call during the working day) plus the funeral with additional flexibility if you needed to support your parents with arrangements because they can’t do them without your help eg they are older themselves. If your grandparents raised you because your parents couldn’t then extra time as you will be making arrangements and it is understandably different. Obviously circumstances are everything, most employers will be a bit flexible but in answer to the op, if it happened last week, not going back on Monday seems to be the issue, for context Dh went back on the Monday after his mum died, he didn’t have any things he could do yet as waiting on the coroner so off to work he went

If my boss asked me for a scheduled meeting I'd say, "Yes, what is it about?"

Seems like a pretty normal reply to be honest.

Far better than worrying and wondering.

I would expect just the day of the funeral, frankly, unless the grandparent had effectively raised you in lieu of a parent.

How on earth did they get away with that? Though I can perhaps imagine it if e.g. the remaining grandparent had dementia or another illness/disability meaning that they needed a lot of daily care which the other used to provide.

Honestly? I’d say a day for the funeral unless there were extenuating circumstances.

I think 2 days is perfectly reasonable and I'd be surprised if his employer was a dick about that.

Did you go off sick? I was lucky to be allowed time off without question.

Totally depends on how close you were, how it's affecting you and what your company policies are. I'd say maybe up to a week. If you're not "fit" for work due to grief following this then you'd have to go off sick - then that would follow your company sick policy. A friend was brought up by her grandmother after her parent died, so when the grandmother died she had a good stint of time. Personally I had no time off when mine died other than for the funeral.

Ex civil servant. No days off for grandparents and annual leave for funeral

I got five days when my mum died. I don't think I took any paid time off when my grandparents died. Just unpaid to travel to the funerals.

Dds work have allowed her a week mostly unpaid but she has no father around so they are treating it as death of parent rather than grandparent

Two of my grandparents died on a weekend so just the one day for the funeral.

Another died on a Thursday. I was sent home after the call and had that day off compassionate leave. I would have been expected in the next day but I already had annual leave booked for a friend's wedding, which I went to. I was again given day off for funeral.

Though only 2 days, the weekend in-between means he's asked for a day off on day 5 which you can see is quite far beyond what most offer. Quite possibly not in trouble, but if he's still not capable of working 5 days later they may just want to check in on him as most wouldn't still be off?

At my place 5 days compassionate leave. Up to 10 if you were NOK and responsible for organising a funeral etc

If it hit you hard you may also use some annual leave or go off sick.

But but but but his job is zero hours. Another zero hours employer wanting it both ways

I had a half day compassionate leave when I found out and then I took the next day off as holiday. Back to work after that.

My workplace doesn't have a policy for leave for an extended family member - we get 5 days for immediate family.

Just time for the funeral.

If you get compassionate leave, then that. Usually 1-2wk if you get it, which is really fortunate.

I went back to work three days after burying my mum at a young age because I'd ran out of compassionate leave being with her as she died. It's just life, you have to get on with it.

I have to be honest I find it a bit silly when adults take huge swathes of time off when they lose a grandparent. You're incredibly lucky to get into adulthood by the time your grandparents die. Of course it's sad, it's also life. If every employer gave every employee a week or two for a grandparent that could be four bio grandparents, four step grandparents, it's a lot and unfortunately people end up taking the mick.

Aside from how much leave a person gets, the very basic from an employer is surely to be kind and understanding and acknowledge the loss.

I'd give an employee the funeral day but probably expect any more to be annual leave.

It’s depends on the employer. My cousin passed away aged 38 (she had cancer) and due to the nature of my job role, my employer gave me 7 days paid leave. I just wouldn’t have been in the right frame of mind to deal with my job and they were very understanding

Many years ago a manager (local government) made a snippy remark when I told him about the death of my much loved gransmother. I was not asking for a day off. I proposed to come in after the funeral (I was due to start work at 1pm) and would be in about 2 pm. I left him a note telling him how upset I was and expected him to apologise. He didnt.The day of the funeral I came in and when I reported I was back he reminded me I had to make up the time!!!

Next day I stayed home and reported sick to a bigger boss. I told him how upset and angry I was at my boss's callous behaviour. Bigger boss granted me 2 days paid leave on his authority. I also asked to a transfer on personal grounds. While I was awaiting the transfer I refused to spek to my immediate boss except on purely professional matters. If he tried to "chat"I walked away. I later learned that bigger boss rang my manager and gave him down the banks for his clumsy and unprofessioanl behaviour. I never did make up the time.

When I became a manager it was a valuable lesson in how to deal with matters when a report tells you about a death in the family or some similar tragedy. You dont make snippy clever remarks. You express regret and then deal with the admin aspect. Most organizations have set rules as to compassinate leave entitlements so you explain these and fill up the required forms.

Yes, though very few people would actually take more than a day or two.

I wouldn’t be overly worried about his meeting, unless he has a poor track record of sickness/absences etc. The only thing that I may be a bit concerned over is that from what you have said he ‘told’ his employer he wouldn’t be in, rather than asking. As I said before most places don’t include grandparents in compassionate leave and as he is on a Zero hour contract I would imagine that would apply to him. It may be a meeting to discuss his attitude as that would happen in my place of work if someone just called in and said they aren’t coming. It also could just be a standard return to work to check he is okay.

I think the fact you are asking whether he should be worried is a bit telling as I don’t know why you automatically think he would loose his job because he had a couple of days off work. I’m presuming there is something else going on alongside it which has you worried this may be the final straw?

I recently took one day (paid) for the funeral. IME it's usually guided by the employee- in my previous role my direct report lost a grandparent he was very close to and we were able to arrange quite a long period including some time under carer's leave rather than bereavement to deal with admin for his gran.

I’d probably only have the day of the funeral off.