How long is acceptable to be off work

My work allows 3 days, I know some people have taken longer, all depends on circumstances

I'm seriously surprised by these responses.
My employer is a bog standard private sector company and the policy is 3 days for any bereavement, more if the person is "close" to you (and they allow you to define close, but grandparents etc are explicitly included as an example).
Find it baffling that people wouldn't expect you to be off for more than a day after losing someone who you have known your whole life but wouldn't sniff at being off for a bad headache for example.

One day for the funeral would be the norm for most employers, I think.
Unless the employee is responsible for making all arrangements etc, then maybe a day or two longer.

Loads of employers do a return to work interview after absences. That's very standard. I'd imagine that's what this is. It isn't designed to be punitive but supportive to make sure the person is actually fit to be back at work and if they need any additional support.

Yes, this is my experience. I don't think it's unreasonable tbh.

I had 1 day for my father and two days for my mum, but that included arranging the funeral, transport, and catering.

No grand parents

For the funeral but have to taken as leave. NHS. Other trusts might be different. You can guess why I know that although it wasn't me but a colleague who is now looking for another job. This was recently too

NHS was 3 days for a parent etc, 1 day for GP (day of funeral) may have changed now…but that was 12 years ago.

You said he is on a zero hour contract, so I'd assume it would be unpaid leave. Has he checked his contract or any work policy handbook? I assume he is also planning a 3rd day off for the actual funeral?

My nan lived abroad, long haul and different time zone. I watched the live stream in the middle of the night UK time and was given 1/2 day off- essentially to get some sleep before work.

What other people were/weren't given in their own companies is really irrelevant to your DH's situation

At my place you would possibly get a days compassionats leave if you claimed a very close connection with them plus a day for the funeral..No more.

Quite frankly no one knows here. What does his contract say? How badly has he been affected. I would say a death warrants as much time as necessary . How it is classified, compassionate leave:sick leave will depend on many factors.

it really annoys me when people are derisory about other people’s response to death. Everyone will have a different response. Often it can be a trigger for a lot more!! I could flip it round and say if someone felt they only needed an afternoon off or the day of the funeral they obviously are quite a cold person- but that would be unfair, it’s just their response, it doesn’t matter of it wouldn’t be mine

I just had a day for the funeral. Why did he take the Monday off too? I can understand if the grandparent was like a parent and raised him? I was very very close to my grandparents but they didn’t raise me and so one day off for the funeral felt an acceptable amount of time off

It all depends on the employer. When my Nan was dying, my company were amazing but what I was given was rare. Also my relationship was more like mother-daughter rather than a grandparent I saw occasionally. I had 3 weeks to care for her at home under hospice at home, one weeks compassionate and I had a weeks holiday booked on top. So it was about 5 weeks all in I was off. Had the day before her funeral, day of and a day off after.

One place I worked I had to take it off as annual leave.

Another place I had the day after off (parents were flying back from abroad so needed to be around to talk to them) and the day of the funeral.

Both NHS.

it still depends....what is the company policy on leave for bereavement? Did he just not turn up or did he negotiate? Is he describing it as sick leave?

3 days compassionate leave, and a day for the funeral (NHS)....
However I know people who have taken more than this
I took a two weeks and a half for my dads death (5 days compassionate leave and 8 days sick leave- but that's because parents live hours away and I was with my mum for the first week- and then dealing with emotional children)...
However my boss took 4 months for her parent, and 2 for her grandparent....

This. TBH I’ve never heard of such leave for a GP, unless it’s one day for attending the funeral.

Many jobs have return to work meetings for any absence, even for a day.

Unless there are additional factors such as caring for someone left behind then taking Monday as well was excessive.

I think it's one of those things that really depends - I got the call about my granddad at work on a Friday lunchtime (it was expected) and my manager told me to go home, I would have gone back on the Monday but had a/l already booked in. I then had a day off (compassionate leave) for the funeral a couple of weeks later. But I have a friend who was practically raised by her grandparents and would have needed more time.

I don't think the time your DH has taken unreasonable, but if it were a member off my team I'd want to chat to them on their return to to see how they are.

My employer was brilliant when my mum was dying. They basically said see you when we see you. I spent 5 days at the hospital (I didn’t go home and stayed with her because I didn’t want her to feel alone at any point) and after she passed at a weekend I went in work on the Monday. My employer told me to go home but at that point, I just wanted to do something normal to give me something else to think about, but my employer didn’t expect me to be in. I think in circumstances like my own, I needed the compassionate leave before my mum passed as opposed to after it. I’ll be forever grateful that my employer had the same stance as I got to spend those last few days by her side.

Very much depends on your employer. I was at work when I got the call to say one of mine had died. I stayed at work but I suspect my boss would have allowed me to leave that day but I wouldn't been allowed to take the following day off. It was assumed I would work on the afternoon of the funeral. (Private sector, professional services).

Three DAYS for a sibling or your 21 year old son who died tragically in a car accident. That’s awful! I would expect someone to have at least a fortnight off for a sibling and probably a month for a child regardless of age.

No one here can say, we don't know anything about his employer or employment history. Reasonableness doesntbcome into it, it's going to be up to the employers policies and whether he complied with whatever the procedures are for taking time off

A very long term zero hours contract as you describe is quite unusual isn't it, is his employer known for having good employee relations I wonder

Taking the Monday off as well after having three days already seems a bit much tbh. Presumably he will also want at least one more day for the funeral.