How long is acceptable to be off work

When my mum's sister died I think she took 2 days, 1 day to go and see her the day before she died and 1 day for the funeral. It hit my mum very hard but it's just the way things were then. She now runs her own business and only took a couple of days when her mum died as well.

I thought our policy was pretty generous and is more than most companies I know. 3 days paid for immediate family member as I previously stated (including in laws) and it will be increased to a further 2 days unpaid in April.

I do believe HR law states 5 working days when it is the death of an immediate relative but up to ten working days if the death is in another country and travel/funeral arrangements have to be accommodated for.

For the period of time that has been taken off, I would say that’s reasonable

Teacher: one day unpaid leave for the funeral.

compassionate leave ends of crossing over into sick leave really. If you are too grief stricken to work then mentally you are sick. I think most people are very upset when a grandparent dies but usually grandparents are older in this circumstance and their death is not unexpected. In think usually a couple of days would be reasonable and then they would need to use PTO. It depends on the person’s relationship with their grandparent more than anything.

For a grandparent I'd say just the day of the funeral, although some of the places I've worked didnt even allow thst. No legal obligation for them to give you any compassionate leave, unless its a " close" family member.

I had two days for the funeral as had to travel. My boss also said I could take the day it occurred off but I preferred to work as welcomed the distraction, and couldn't do anything to help my mum from where I was.

It depends how much in grief you are and whether your grief effects your ability to work, like illness. I can turn up to work if you don't mind me suddenly sobbing during a meeting?

we don't get anything, I'm not even sure we get time off for the funeral of a grandparent. One of my colleagues had a couple of weeks off when his gran died but he lived with her, was her main career and next of kin to arrange funeral, sort out estate etc.

I took one day TOIL (Monday) after losing my grandmother on the Sunday. This was due to the initial shock and feeling physically unwell due to that. Plus 1 paid day for the funeral.

She was closer to me than anyone but I wanted to keep busy, I knew I’d feel worse without something to occupy my mind. I understand taking time off if you’re in charge of funeral planning, registering the death etc but otherwise I think taking lots of time off can make things harder.

I was closer to my grandad than my dad. I had 3 days off and 1 for th funeral.

That sounds reasonable. When my brother died I didn't go in for a week (5 days).

My manager did suggest I don't come in for another week but I did, which I did regret later.

My work is up to three days compassionate leave and that would extend to a grandparent but it's a limit, not a target. Circumstances vary and managers have some discretion, for example of the grandparent had raised the employee in lieu of a parent.

I would advise that if the bereaved is so affected their mental health detrimentally affected, they go to their doctor to be signed off for bereavement or non work related stress. That will obviously involve other triggers vis a vis ill-health capability but may necessary.

It's a difficult line between those who are genuinely and severely affected and those who take the tiddle in all and every circumstance.

I too was only allowed 1 day when my dad died. We aren't allowed anything for grandparents.

1 day for the funeral, or if you are the only relative and have the responsibility of registering death, dealing with undertakers, etc, then maybe an extra day.
Or if it was a close grandparent, who was about to die, and you wanted to be there, then another die at that point.
So the answer is, that it depends on the circumstances.
In some instances one can be very close to a GP, and may not be able to do one's work properly.

I was off work for 4 months with a tragic death in our family. It was a murder and family member was young. My grandad also died in this period but it felt a very different circumstance. I think it depends on a lot of factors but maybe a week or two?

I went home early on the day then day off for funeral

Had a week off when parents died, plus funeral. Brother in law a day plus funeral.
Something really awful happened with child, I had 4 months off. Hard to say what others should do as circumstances and relationships affect how we cope massively. My employers have always been fantastic and I do appreciate that.

My work would give you a minimum of 5 days compassionate leave.

more with discretion.

and could be topped up with annual leave

When FIL died our DC, one military the other NHS, got the day off for the funeral. DH got a couple of hours off on the actual day he died, then 3 days compassionate, including the day of the funeral.

Reading these comments makes me so scared. I still have both my grandparents (mums parents) and they helped bring me up. I see them every week. I will be devastated when they go and I don’t know how to actually cope with losing someone as the last time I lost a family remember I was only 2! I wouldn’t be able to just take a day. It’s sad this is how it is when you’re employed.

For a grandparent I'd say a day for the funeral.

One day for the funeral.
time to travel to / from the funeral if it is not local - could be annual leave / unpaid leave ?

Each company will have its own rules but I didn't take any time off for GPs.

For my mother I got 1.5 weeks. My father died when I was still a student.

He has to get holiday approved but he let them know he’d be off as you would if you were off sick.

Perhaps it’s how he went about it. I’d ask my manager for bereavement leave, not inform them, as it isn’t a right.

It’s a zero hours contract - so that should mean no guaranteed hours but also no guarantee that the worker will do the hours he’s offered. That’s the only way it can work fairly. He is therefore completely within his rights not to be available for work (although I bet the arrangement is more like they tell him when to work and he has to do what he’s told).