My mother is not in the best financial situation and never treats herself.
I am in quite a bad financial situation and she has no idea. I lost two clients due to budget cuts 7 months ago so monthly income went from £4.5k a month to £1.5k a month.
I am the breadwinner. We are dipping into savings every month and all spending that isn't essential has ground to a halt.
I don't want my mum to know this. The situation is too complex to explain why but this is really important to me.
Last year for mother's day I went all out. Her friend had died two months before, I got an unexpected £500. So I took her to a spa, then out to a three course meal and got her a giant bouquet. It cost a lot more than I was planning to pay as I didn't intend for it to be three course but I got carried away.
She has spoken about this all year.
I was a guest a panel last week and received the most lovely hamper as a thank you. It's from a social enterprise, it's full of sustainable products and is really really lovely, every product has an interesting story.
I was about to tuck into it myself but then I had the idea to regift it to mum but obviously she wouldn't know it was a regift.
But it's not the same as a £150 spa day and £150 dinner.
I looked up the brand online and I couldn't find the exact one so I think it was a build your own hamper and I guess around £50.
I wouldn't give her a gift I thought she wouldn't like.
If she wasn't comparing to last year it would have gone down really well. It's not that she would dislike the gift, just that she would be expecting more.
She messaged this morning saying how much she loved Mother's Day last year and how special it made her feel. I know this is a hint and I feel so rubbish.
I have to be careful with mum because if I do something like offer to cook her dinner she will say 'let's just go out to eat'.
AIBU to give her this gift?