Mum keeping whole of grandmother’s inheritance

The mum's promise means nothing.

No.

Even if the mum promised?

If there was no will then she isn’t obliged to give you anything. You need to let it go.

If there was no will, then you haven’t got a leg to stand on. Hopefully, your mum will be kind. She doesn’t have to do a thing, but I shared my inheritances with my kids.

I couldn’t do that to my kids, there was £85k that was unexpected and not needed by the mum, why wouldn’t you share it out between the grandchildren, it’s so hard to get on to the property ladder or afford anything really, I’d be so happy to give them a £25k gift each from their late gran, especially as it wasn’t expected.
sorry but sounds like greed on the mum/aunties side.

But how would that change anything? Still cant make her mum pay out even if her aunt has.

I would expect her to follow through with gifting you the 4k but not the 100k divided up because they clearly wouldn't have promised that much. Why don't you ask her about it though?

Pretty poor behaviour on your mum and aunt’s part to have promised (as I think says in your OP) and then not followed through. Even if it wasn’t a massive amount, eg. the original 4k implied rather than a big amount, it’s the principle of it.
YANBU to feel hurt and resentful but equally you don’t know their circumstances or intentions without speaking to them and they haven’t acted illegally, just mean in my opinion.

Apart from the fact they promised you money, they didn't do anything wrong. Money and assets pass down to the next generation unless in the will, so your aunt and mum were entitled to keep the assets. If there were items of sentimental value, such as jewelry, you'll get this eventually anyway when your mum passes. I think they shouldn't have promised you something though, and then not followed through.

I think it’s worth a shot talking to your mum that you would appreciate some of that money - how do you think she’d react to that?

I do mean this kindly when I say that your grandmother could have made provision in a will for you, your siblings and cousins, but for whatever reason, chose not to.

It says in the OP that her mother and Aunty promised to split the assets with the grandchildren

My mum promised me some money towards a house deposit, when I was looking to buy I just let her know and asked her if that was something she was still willing to contribute, of course letting her know it was her choice.

She was happy to, all was fine. Try asking her nicely before you start feeling resentful! (And obviously respect her decision if it is a ‘no’)

If deceased was intestate then it looks as though her two(?) offspring would take the estate in equal shares.

Which is what's happened.

@Virgoschild what makes you beleive anything different was intended?

That's a good point. It would be odd if two mothers, who promised their DC a modest sum from the grandmother's estate, both reneged on the promise.

The op has never suggested or asked if she is entitled to the money legally and some of these responses are just rude.

Did people not get to the final paragraphs???

Here:

I don’t feel like I can raise it with my mum either without looking like an awful money grabbing daughter. I feel like the conversation just wouldn’t go well, especially as my mum is still so upset by the death.

So AIBU? Also if anyone has any insight which might help me understand my mums position, I’d appreciate it

Dh mum did similar with 300k.. promised the world and delivered a few meals out
It was her money though, made DH change how he feels about her and now its all spent anyway

If there was no spouse then the Op mother and aunty are doing nothing wrong the estate is inherited by the deceased children in absence of a spouse, Grandchildren ,only inherit ,if their parent has died, they will inherit their parents share
Been through this a few years ago when my dh estranged father died intestate.

If there is no will and no spouse - then the money gets split 50/50 between your mum and aunty.

They then can chose whether to pass any further on to you.

You are entitled to nothing.

Have you spoken to your cousins? Has their Mum given them the money but perhaps your Mum hasn't?

Honestly I wouldn't even say that because they'd (justifiably) point out it's unwise to spend money in your head that you don't have.

I'd just keep it very straightforward and factual - "you mentioned previously that X assets would be passed to grandchildren. We understand there is no legal claim but we would like to know if this promise still stands, and if so can we make arrangements."

But her mum obviously doesn't need the money. I'd be so upset if she's gone back on her promise.

How did the assets jump from 15k to 100k, who told you the value, legally you're not entitled but if your mum and aunts promised a cash gift I would mention it, have your cousins asked their mum.

If there’s no will, then AFAIK there are rules laid down as to who should get what. GOogle inheritance rules if no will. Sounds as if your mother is choosing to contravene normal practice.

This is one reason people are urged to make wills. If you don’t, and the rules say the relative you can’t stand, who was always horrible to you, is entitled to X%, that’s that. But if you make a will, you can exclude them, and add a reason why, if you like - plus it helps if they should try to contest the will.

It was mean to offer or promise you something significant and then renege.

I think the best you can do is say “it’s a bit awkward really because when you originally offered a share of the assets I committed that £4k towards XYZ in my mind. I’m now needing to save for that from other sources . Of course it’s completely your call, I understand that, but just curious as to why you changed your mind?”