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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to think this is shoddy after a job interview?

243 replies

LindorDoubleChoc · 09/03/2026 13:09

Had job interview early last week, after a preliminary phone interview. I was there being interviewed by two people for nearly 2 hours and had to complete some written tasks (like a simple test).

When I left the woman who interviewed me said they would let people know by the end of the week or possibly Monday. I asked how many they were seeing and she replied "4".

So I haven't heard anything and just feel in my bones that I'm not going to by the end of today. If I don't, AIBU to think this is an absolutely unacceptable way to treat the unsuccessful candidates, given that there were such a small number?

I WAS sad at the thought of not getting the job, now I feel I'd sooner not work for a business that is so ... rude? is that the word?

OP posts:
Moonnstarz · 09/03/2026 16:47

Thechaseison71 · 09/03/2026 16:45

Why wouldn't you have sorted a salary offer before interviewing people? Surely you would have to tell the job seeker such a thing. And approval for what?

Isn't it the case most companies might advertise a pay scale or point, with the general belief the candidate will start at the lower end. If you get a candidate who asks to start at the top of the scale then that might need to be checked.

Thechaseison71 · 09/03/2026 16:45

UpTheWomen · 09/03/2026 14:42

God, if only recruiting was as simple as interviewing four candidates and then sending four emails! Where I am I have to get approval from HR, have a conversation with them and with the budget holder about the salary I can offer, and then get sign off further up the chain. If the person I offer to wants to think about it overnight, they can, and in the meantime I won’t contact unsuccessful candidates in case the first choice person doesn’t accept, and I can then offer it to the second ranked person. If the first choice candidate negotiates on salary or conditions, that can take a couple of days to resolve up and down the line. So while I might make a decision on who is the top candidate within a day of interviewing them, being in a position to make an offer can take a bit longer, and being sure the other candidates are unsuccessful and communicating that to them can take even longer than that.

Why wouldn't you have sorted a salary offer before interviewing people? Surely you would have to tell the job seeker such a thing. And approval for what?

JassyRadlett · 09/03/2026 16:42

I hope for their sake they've gone with someone who can listen to and take constructive feedback.

Moonnstarz · 09/03/2026 16:37

Maybe they have offered it to another candidate but they haven't accepted yet. Maybe they have given them a deadline to confirm whether they accept or not. If they weren't possibly going to contact people til Monday maybe this is what is currently happening - they have spoken to someone today, they have asked for time to consider it, and they don't want to ring others yet to say no in case the first choice says no.

UpTheWomen · 09/03/2026 14:42

God, if only recruiting was as simple as interviewing four candidates and then sending four emails! Where I am I have to get approval from HR, have a conversation with them and with the budget holder about the salary I can offer, and then get sign off further up the chain. If the person I offer to wants to think about it overnight, they can, and in the meantime I won’t contact unsuccessful candidates in case the first choice person doesn’t accept, and I can then offer it to the second ranked person. If the first choice candidate negotiates on salary or conditions, that can take a couple of days to resolve up and down the line. So while I might make a decision on who is the top candidate within a day of interviewing them, being in a position to make an offer can take a bit longer, and being sure the other candidates are unsuccessful and communicating that to them can take even longer than that.

H1ppychicken · 09/03/2026 14:39

I interviewed three people last week and hoped to get back to them by the end of the week however I have offered it to our first choice and am waiting for them to send references and accept the position which is also dependent on their visa. There is a lot involved in recruiting someone. If the first choice says no or can’t get their affairs in order there is a second choice who is also suitable so I am reticent to turn them down yet - equally if the second choice person is offered it I could hope they would start feeling positive and this might not be the case if they knew they were second choice.
That’s why we say we ‘hope’ to get back to people by …….
It’s horrible when the power is all on the recruiters side but if as you say you are ‘over’ this company then please do as someone says above and take back the power and tell them you are no longer interested. An interview should be a two way process and if there were things you didn’t like about them then it’s not for you.

FuckoffeeBeforeCoffee · 09/03/2026 14:38

It’s not right but it’s pretty standard.

I was job hunting last year and I probably didn’t hear back more than I did. It’s rude but seems to be the norm.

DurhamDurham · 09/03/2026 14:37

It’s not just offering someone the job, they need to have someone formally accept the position. If their first choice declines, and that does happen, then the job may be offered to their second choice.

pouletvous · 09/03/2026 14:34

No news is good news

take a chill pill. Go for a walk. Distract yourself

VimesandhisCardboardBoots · 09/03/2026 14:29

LindorDoubleChoc · 09/03/2026 14:24

I'm not being ridiculous because I said in my op "IF I don't hear by the end of today aibu ..."

But you started a thread about it at lunchtime, so you're obviously already seething about it, and have assumed you're going to hear nothing back.

ColdAsAWitches · 09/03/2026 14:28

You are being ridiculous because you are complaining about something that hasn't actually happened. You said "I WAS sad at the thought of not getting the job, now I feel I'd sooner not work for a business that is so ... rude". They haven't been rude yet. They might never be.

LindorDoubleChoc · 09/03/2026 14:24

I'm not being ridiculous because I said in my op "IF I don't hear by the end of today aibu ..."

OP posts:
ColdAsAWitches · 09/03/2026 14:12

4 people in total, just 4. It would take less than two minutes to write a suitable "thanks but no thanks" email. I reckon I could do it in 60 seconds.

But there's a hundred things that need to be done before that! They haven't decided who to send those emails to yet. You're being absolutely ridiculous here. It still hasn't reached the end of their deadline, so they still haven't actually done anything wrong.

Handbagneeded · 09/03/2026 14:11

I went for a job interview a couple of years ago, hadn’t heard anything after a week so rang to check, was told by the recruitment company ‘If you haven’t heard anything after 2 weeks it means you didn’t get the job’

Just bloody rude IMO, in this days and age how much effort does it take to send a blanket email to interviewees saying thank but no thanks!

Somersetbaker · 09/03/2026 14:09

The important point is that they haven't told you that they're not offering you the job.

converseandjeans · 09/03/2026 14:06

For teaching interviews you only ever used to get a call if you got the job & they never bothered to call if you didn’t get the job.

Sometimes they offer a job & wait to hear yes or no before they let the other candidates know. That gives them chance to still recruit from that field.

snoopyfanaccountant · 09/03/2026 14:06

DH has recently been offered a new job. He was one of the last 2 still in running for it and after a 9.30am second interview he was told that they would make their decision that day. By lunchtime he hadn't heard anything and assumed he hadn't got it but that they were waiting for the other candidate to accept before they contacted him. They then emailed at 2pm asking if they could do a Teams call at 4.30. Having been offered it, he asked to sleep on it as it's going to be a massive upheaval for us as a family and then called back the following morning to accept the job.

Thechaseison71 · 09/03/2026 14:04

madaboutpurple · 09/03/2026 13:24

A friend of mine was once told she would be told on a certain day after going for an interview and gave up hope. She was contacted a few weeks later and it turned out the interviewer's husband had been rushed to hospital and the lady had been visiting him in hospital. You cannot account for things happening. All the best anyway.

Now that's just ridiculous. Someone else could've contacted her in that time. Many people would've taken another job by that time and the company would have to do the whole recruitment process again

LindorDoubleChoc · 09/03/2026 14:03

InveterateWineDrinker · 09/03/2026 13:56

I've been ghosted multiple times after face-to-face interviews. You might still hear back from them, but I'd start to mentally write this one off if I were you.

I'm sorry to hear that. If you've had a face to face interview I don't think it's too much to ask not to be ghosted!

OP posts:
Passingthrough123 · 09/03/2026 14:00

LindorDoubleChoc · 09/03/2026 13:38

No, I haven't ever recruited before and how is that relevant?

4 people in total, just 4. It would take less than two minutes to write a suitable "thanks but no thanks" email. I reckon I could do it in 60 seconds.

All interviews were last week or how else could she say "we'll let you know by the end of the week ... or possibly Monday". As in Monday would be unlikely, they were aiming to do it by the end of the week.

And in my op I did say "If" I don't hear by the end of today then is that shoddy? I'm not holding out hope as they would have contacted me by now if they'd wanted me.

Their kitchen area was pretty gross tbh and only 1 toilet between 15ish people. And short hours and long commute. Nah, I'm over it Grin.

Well, yes, anyone can write an email in 60 seconds, but as someone said above, any offer would have to be signed off by whoever interviewed you, possibly their boss too and any bosses above them, potentially a head office, plus HR and accounts, and there's no guarantee everyone's in the workplace to do that straight away.

If not hearing by the end of the day is making you decide you're not interested in the position any longer, I fear job hunting is going to be quite the slog for you. Go on LinkedIn where people are complaining about applying for dozens of jobs and being constantly ghosted – that's the reality of recruiting these days.

Swiftie1878 · 09/03/2026 13:57

LindorDoubleChoc · 09/03/2026 13:38

No, I haven't ever recruited before and how is that relevant?

4 people in total, just 4. It would take less than two minutes to write a suitable "thanks but no thanks" email. I reckon I could do it in 60 seconds.

All interviews were last week or how else could she say "we'll let you know by the end of the week ... or possibly Monday". As in Monday would be unlikely, they were aiming to do it by the end of the week.

And in my op I did say "If" I don't hear by the end of today then is that shoddy? I'm not holding out hope as they would have contacted me by now if they'd wanted me.

Their kitchen area was pretty gross tbh and only 1 toilet between 15ish people. And short hours and long commute. Nah, I'm over it Grin.

Sounds like they made the correct decision not to recruit you!

InveterateWineDrinker · 09/03/2026 13:56

I've been ghosted multiple times after face-to-face interviews. You might still hear back from them, but I'd start to mentally write this one off if I were you.

BillieWiper · 09/03/2026 13:54

LindorDoubleChoc · 09/03/2026 13:38

No, I haven't ever recruited before and how is that relevant?

4 people in total, just 4. It would take less than two minutes to write a suitable "thanks but no thanks" email. I reckon I could do it in 60 seconds.

All interviews were last week or how else could she say "we'll let you know by the end of the week ... or possibly Monday". As in Monday would be unlikely, they were aiming to do it by the end of the week.

And in my op I did say "If" I don't hear by the end of today then is that shoddy? I'm not holding out hope as they would have contacted me by now if they'd wanted me.

Their kitchen area was pretty gross tbh and only 1 toilet between 15ish people. And short hours and long commute. Nah, I'm over it Grin.

But they haven't made the decision yet.

They're asking if you've recruited before because it's a few different parts of a business and a process that must be followed. If their number one candidates can't be contacted yet then they'll wait to confirm them. Or they might need to go to a B list. The whole thing might not definitely happen on the dot of EOB Monday.

I wish you luck and hope you get it if you want it.
But just be a bit patient. Then by all means mid week if nothing follow up with a brief email.

Bearbookagainandagain · 09/03/2026 13:53

You need to chill really. A week is perfectly fine.

If you had the same attitude during the interview, you probably won't get it, indeed.

GlasgowGal2014 · 09/03/2026 13:50

Give them a chance - they've not even missed their own deadline yet! They might not have been able to make up their mind on Friday and have taken the weekend to sleep on it, or they might have offered to someone late last week who has asked for some time to think about it so they're not yet in a position to let down the runners up. There are any number of scenarios that can lead to a recruiter not managing to get back to a candidate within the promised timelines, but despite that yours aren't even late yet!

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