Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To not want to tell anyone about my pregnancy?

52 replies

ripleynot · 09/03/2026 10:37

I am 12 weeks pregnant. I have my NHS dating scan at the end of this week at 13 weeks. We haven’t told anyone I’m pregnant yet - including our families and mothers. It was always my intention to keep it private until after the NHS scan, we also had a private NIPT (which has just come back all clear) so I wanted to wait until after everything seemed to be progressing well. We’ve had baby and pregnancy loss in our immediate families and I really didn’t want to put myself or our mothers through trauma with regards to an early miscarriage or a TFMR.

Now everything is looking good and we have no reason to believe that I won’t have a positive scan (I’ve had a couple of private scans that are progressing well). The plan had been to drive to tell my Mother that day, and to tell my husband’s parents later that week. We’ve been thinking of fun ways to tell them, been excited that we won’t have to lie anymore (I speak to my Mother everyday so it’s been strange keeping it a secret).

But now the time is approaching I feel like I don’t want to tell anyone. I love our parents but they are the kind of people who will have opinions and ask questions. So far it’s just been my husband and I and I feel like suddenly I (and this pregnancy) is about to become public property. It makes me feel anxious and irritated and I just don’t know whether I can handle it.

Has anyone else felt like this? Would I be unreasonable to keep it private for longer? How do I get over this feeling? I feel completely alien compared to the people I know and see who phone their families before the pee is dry on the test.

OP posts:
Naws · 09/03/2026 10:41

I love our parents but they are the kind of people who will have opinions and ask questions.

How dare they.

The utter caring bastards.

It's up to you but you're going to have the longest pregnancy in the world if you're stressing over simply telling your mums.

rubyslippers · 09/03/2026 10:38

It’s entirely up to you

Swipe left for the next trending thread