Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To have a shower while a contractor works at our home?

111 replies

FryingPam · 09/03/2026 08:30

Husband also at home, me fully dressed into the bathroom, lock the door, shower, coming fully dressed out of the bathroom again. DH thinks this would be very weird and make the contractor feel uncomfortable.

OP posts:
NewZebra · 09/03/2026 09:22

I personally would feel a bit weird myself, but if you don’t then it’s fine! Doubt the contractor would be bothered at all.

2026Y · 09/03/2026 09:19

didntlikeanyofthesuggestions · 09/03/2026 09:06

A suitable compromise would be to tell the contractor you are going to shower but you will be doing so in a swimming costume. This way you get your shower but he's also aware you won't be nude.

😂

DeftWasp · 09/03/2026 09:17

FryingPam · 09/03/2026 08:30

Husband also at home, me fully dressed into the bathroom, lock the door, shower, coming fully dressed out of the bathroom again. DH thinks this would be very weird and make the contractor feel uncomfortable.

I'm an electrician, I can be in a customers home for a week or more on bigger jobs, they crack on with life as normal - I wouldn't be paying much attention to them unless they want to discuss something or offer me a cuppa! - certainly what you describe would be totally normal!

Original poster
FryingPam · 09/03/2026 09:12

It’s just the timings today, I couldn’t go for a run early in the morning and I can’t in the evening, but I could squeeze it in during my lunch break (WFH) but want a shower afterwards.

This thread is nothing dramatic btw, DH wouldn’t stop me from having a shower and I also would survive without one, I just found it interesting to see if others also think it’s weird doing this while a stranger is at home.

OP posts:
Unfenced · 09/03/2026 09:08

didntlikeanyofthesuggestions · 09/03/2026 09:06

A suitable compromise would be to tell the contractor you are going to shower but you will be doing so in a swimming costume. This way you get your shower but he's also aware you won't be nude.

Or wearing a full wetsuit. OK, you’re not going to get clean, but at least the OP’s DH’s mind will be put at rest about the lustful imaginings of the unfortunate contractor?

Unfenced · 09/03/2026 09:06

soontobeamama · 09/03/2026 08:58

I don’t think I would feel comfortable to have a shower while a tradesman was working in the house. We are currently renovating our house and have had a lot of workers in; I tend to just shower before they arrive in the morning. I do also feel strange going to the bathroom if a stranger is working in the house, but if you feel comfortable enough, that’s up to you.

This makes absolutely no sense. You can’t shower and it bothers you to know that tradesmen or builders know that you have the normal bodily function that they have too?

didntlikeanyofthesuggestions · 09/03/2026 09:06

A suitable compromise would be to tell the contractor you are going to shower but you will be doing so in a swimming costume. This way you get your shower but he's also aware you won't be nude.

user1492757084 · 09/03/2026 09:05

Just have your shower. If DH has an opinion, he can use that opinion to direct how he, himself, behaves.

Isobel201 · 09/03/2026 09:04

I can't really relax when someone is doing a job in the house, so I wouldn't have had a shower or done anything major. I usually sit in the living room until they're done. But if you feel comfortable, go for it.

Catcatcatcatcat · 09/03/2026 09:03

I wouldn’t but I have had some bad experiences.

damelza · 09/03/2026 09:01

Is there any reason you couldn't have showered either before the contractor arrives or after he leaves?

I personally wouldn't feel OK myself especially in a flat. Different if they are working downstairs and bathroom is upstairs.

Amira83 · 09/03/2026 09:01

I wouldn't do it, id just wait til he goes til I had a shower.

soontobeamama · 09/03/2026 08:58

I don’t think I would feel comfortable to have a shower while a tradesman was working in the house. We are currently renovating our house and have had a lot of workers in; I tend to just shower before they arrive in the morning. I do also feel strange going to the bathroom if a stranger is working in the house, but if you feel comfortable enough, that’s up to you.

thisoldcity · 09/03/2026 08:55

This is hilarious. Shows how some men's minds works doesn't it? Hears a shower running and immediately has some sort of porn images going on in his head and assumes every other man does the same. Poor things, it must be dreadful having to live that way...

InterestedDad37 · 09/03/2026 08:53

I think you should insist that your husband wears a full burka, in case the sight of his flesh or hair inflames the contractor's lustful gay passions. It stands to reason 🤔😏

Pricesandvices · 09/03/2026 08:53

It's fine if your husband is in.

I can't do anything when I have tradesmen in as I have to watch the front door like a hawk as they never bloody shut it despite me asking.

Unfenced · 09/03/2026 08:53

FryingPam · 09/03/2026 08:46

He doesn’t shower either when someone else is there

Show quote history

But why? What does he think will happen?

Starseeking · 09/03/2026 08:51

I would always make sure to be ready for the day, including showering, before any strangers came into my house, so I can see where your DH is coming from.

HatStickBoots · 09/03/2026 08:50

Husband is probably re-living all of the 1970s porn he watched in secret when his parents went out.

AwayADay · 09/03/2026 08:49

Surely he has no problem with you using the loo if you need to whilst the workman is there ? You walk into the bathroom fully dressed and leave just the same .
Why is having a shower and doing the same any different ?

fruitbrewhaha · 09/03/2026 08:49

That’s weird. Shower when you need to.

JayJayj · 09/03/2026 08:47

Is your husband controlling in other areas of your relationship?

Original poster
FryingPam · 09/03/2026 08:46

Unfenced · 09/03/2026 08:43

But you still haven’t said why your husband thinks it’s problematic for someone to have a shower while a tradesman is working elsewhere in the flat? Is he refusing to shower himself while the tradesman is in, in case the tradesman is gay and the thought of your DH in the shower Inflames His Imagination?

Show quote history

He doesn’t shower either when someone else is there

OP posts:
Boolabus · 09/03/2026 08:45

Does he also expect you not to go to the toilet while the contractor is there? I probably wouldn't if I was on my own but your dh is there, he is being unreasonable

2026Y · 09/03/2026 08:45

FryingPam · 09/03/2026 08:41

It is a small flat, so the contractor would be in the room right next to it/pass by the door and hear the water, rather than me being in a different part of the property. I still don’t think it’s that bad, surely he can manage knowing that someone has a shower?

This makes zero difference! It you were swanning around in a towel in front of said contractor, I would see his point, but you're not. He's mad.

Swipe left for the next trending thread