To feel like a right loser- anyone else?

You used the word crazy, I'm simply agreeing that yes it's crazy that you feel like you do 😳

Personally I think that's a really good income. Higher than our household income and we're very happy with what we have.

I think what those people spend their money on are a waste of money and wouldn't spend mine on them. We have a lovely home, a car we both love driving and a son we adore. I use second hand clothes for my son and use Vinted. There's not a single designer item in our house. There'll always be someone with something you think is better than you but it doesn't make you a loser.

Comparison is the thief of joy! Be grateful for the things you have that make you happy!

Those on £250k a year look at those on £400k and probably are saying the same. There’s always some one with a bigger house, a fancier car, more exotic holidays. You know you are doing well (and many people will remind you that £60k is not a ‘middle earner’) so step back and don’t think of what you lack but how much you already have.
I never earned more than £30k at my (creative) job. My DH earned £500k (and had an ex wife and two other children he supported 100%). He died unexpectedly when my kids were little and soon we were back to living on my £30k (albeit I was able to buy a house - half the size of my marital home - with the equity). That certainly snapped me back to being very grateful for what I did have as for many £30k is it.

I’ve tried my best to work my way up the ladder and I earn £60k plus bonus (I’m in my mid 30s) and DH is about the same (bigger bonus) so we earn about £130k a year which it’s crazy that I feel like a loser but I just do.

Yeah it is (crazy I mean).

I'd say this is more about your mental health than anything else.

I'd look at that if you can because no matter what you do in life or how much you earn, that feeling with never leave you if your MH is suffering.

I feel like an even bigger loser now on my paltry £25k 🤣

On the opposite side, I'm jealous of those people who get to go on caravan holidays. We are paying off debt and a few days in a caravan playing board games and cards with my family would be bliss!

YABU - I'm 48 and I only started earning over £50k 18 months ago! And a lot of people will never earn that much, I never actually expected to but changed careers recently.

It is frustrating when you have small kids and the costs keep going up and up - it is not unreasonable to be upset that childcare is so crushingly expensive and it feels like your life is on hold but remember, almost everyone else is in the same boat or a worse one.

I remember crying with frustration about the costs when my kids were little, but I didn't blame myself, I recognised it was costly and hard for everyone and that in many ways I was very fortunate.

And as for people sneering at people who take caravan holidays - please don't base your self worth on judgmental, nasty people. If you wouldn't be snide about other people's life options, don't put any stock in the crappy opinions of people that do.

I think it's fine to be frustrated and to feel cheated out of the life you feel you deserve for what you're bringing in, but it isn't your fault. People ought to be able to live better on £130k or £60k or £30k, but you'd be better off being angry at a system that gives us cheap t-shirts and bedside tables etc but extortionate groceries, utilities and housing.

Comparison is the thief of joy.

Well you earn more than me and are more senior at work than me so I feel like a bigger loser 😭 😂 Also you're about to have 3 kids which is a massive flex in this day and age!

On the other hand: your colleagues sound like dicks (luckily I'm better off in that respect).

It sounds trite but: stay off social media (including those awful thread on MN). Remind yourself that people like your colleagues are twats. Concentrate on your own life.