What is considered rich these days??

I never paid a penny for nursery.

I took it that £7k covers mortgage and nursery fees which is completely believable.

£3k mortgage plus 2 times £2k nursery fees.

A 7k mortgage, even in London, is so far beyond “essential goings”.
Taking out a 25 year term with an interest rate of 4.5% you are talking close to 1.5M on the mortgage loan alone.
You can hardly choose to borrow that much for a house and moan about your essentials being high.

£7k mortgage is quite mental though, you are brave to take that on!

I find this an odd goady thread and if feels like you wish to show off. For context before I start my husband and I are both high earners and our annual income is considerably higher than yours, but I’d never start a thread to tell people. if I didn’t work and was a nurse when I did work, I certainly would not claim we had worked hard to get here.

its lovely you enjoy staying at home when your kids are at school I don’t judge that, it wasn’t for me, but each to their own, I do judge the way you take credit for your husbands income like it’s your success and it’s your earnings, it is not.

there is something in your tone which I suspect drives your sil comments, I feel an urge to do similar and it’s the show off tone to it. Even when we earn more I feel my nose wrinkling in disgust at you.

How much do you actually have in savings? £1-2 million or more on top of your possessions, or virtually nothing? How long would you be wealthy if your DH lost his job?

The definition of wealthy is usually someone with more money than you.

How much do you think nursery costs? There is no free nursery, so my choice is either to work and pay fees or not to work. Yes a childminder is marginally cheaper. The whoooole point of what I said (reading comprehension skills!) is that those on average salary do not spend the amount we do on nursery as they get free hours 🙄

You absolutely don’t need to be spending that much. It’s a choice. God help those on average salaries hey, or do they not live in your area?

No. There are hundreds of thousands of women who work AND raise children.

Being a SAHM isn’t easy, because it’s boring (I know from experience). But it isn’t hard work.

Staying at home whilst your husband works in a well paid job is easy, it certainly isn’t hard. You must have a very small perspective on real life if you think that’s hard work. Hard work is juggling work, alongside a family and home. And it’s irrespective of salary, lots of lowely workers work harder than management.

That’s why I said ‘feel’. It’s not ‘easily spent’ it’s essential outgoings. And with regards to nursery it an expense that only people with a high salary have to pay. We pay thousands a month that those with a lower income don’t - for the same service. Even though the income Is taxed at 45%.

OP, did you and your husband go to private schools?

Leave it your husband to support his sister. I'm the higher earner in our wider family and I supported my brother with a deposit for a house. Why would I want to see my sibling struggling when I am doing well. That is just want families do.

@Soccermomsavesthedayyour DH earns in the top 1% of salaries.

So yes you are rich, wealthy and very privileged.

your are richer than 99% of people in the UK

So, the OP has said both that the bonus pays for private school otherwise we wouldn’t afford it so easily. And then she says, We do choose to pay for private schools etc but it’s planned and budgeted and we go without in other places as the children’s schooling is a high priority for us a family. All families have their priorities and they vary but that is ours for various reasons.

So first of all, which is it? And second of all, if the OP couldn't afford private school, or couldn't afford to live in the catchment of a great state school, and many people can't, does that make her someone who prioritises her children's education more than the person who can't? No, it just makes her someone who can pay for it. We sent our three to private because we wanted to, could afford it and it fit in with our lives. Does that make me a superior parent to my friends who couldn't or didn't? No, again.

I'll also add that it's risky to rely on a bonus for your DC's schooling. Bonuses, by nature, vary, and if the firm has a bad year, or your hours are down, poof.

You're more than welcome to believe whatever you like, including that I'm not a lawyer. Although I've never done criminal law, so you're way off there on victims and criminals (although I no longer practice law at all). Corporate disputes run a little drier than that.

And unlike the OP, I didn't assume the people reading this were so dim or uneducated or gullible that l would need to talk down to them in terms I thought they would understand, like saying barrister when I meant something completely different.

Ah right. Thanks!

Not-so-stealthy stealth post. Try harder OP 😂

Unless the nice 4 bedroom detached house with a lovely sized, wrap around garden is mortgage free, the RRs are owned outright, and you've got at least a few hundred thousand stashed in the bank, no, I wouldn't consider you rich. Well off but not rich.

Also (as a previous RR owner) I'm bemused that you've bought two of the useless fuckers.

It all depends on what you class as rich, poor or somewhere in the middle. I consider myself very rich but there are those that would say i was as poor as a church mouse when they see our 20 year old car.
Poor is when you are using food banks, going without heat or power or can't afford new knickers from poundland. The extras such as tv subscritions, getting your nails done are way out of the reach of someone who is poor.
OP you are well off and there is nothing wrong with that at all but don't pretend you are not.

A lot of people in this country ‘work really hard’ and are still struggling to put food on the table. I think you need to check your privilege, especially as you can afford not to work.

Exactly.

Why both so bitchy? Is it projection?

What did you study “so far beyond postgraduate level”? Lots of people have worked hard, studied hard, worked their way up the ladder with no financial help. Your husband’s income puts you in top 1%. Yes anyone without infinite money has to make a budget, even Elon Musk, but if you can’t see that you are budgeting with a very large amount of money where you choose one luxury over another rather than one necessity over another you are out of touch.

But he considers it theirs.

I wouldn’t call you rich- my husband earns a bit more 400k and I only 25l a year, we class ourselves are good salary wise but rich nope 🙂‍↔️ we don’t have assesses behind us or family wealth money . Kids all in private school but there’s some serious wealth behind some of them. Where as if my husband lost his job we don’t have this - so
similar to yourselves im
guessing?

Indeed.
There's a new one started wondering why new money is so frowned upon in the UK?
May be the reason the OP hasn't had time to return here...🤔

Yes they give themselves away because they only talk about salary and surface items like cars, nothing about money is invested or actual underlying wealth. Then ask "Am I rich then...?"