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Adult children

93 replies

Theresaratinmykitchen1 · 07/03/2026 22:15

Hi all,

just hoping for some advice regarding my 19 (almost 20yo).

They are in an age gap relationship which I do not approve of (currently at uni).

Am I being over protective or how can I encourage my child into a relationship more their own age?

When discussed, they have indicated concern with partners their own age, particularly misogyny & lack of trust.

OP posts:
Theresaratinmykitchen1 · 07/03/2026 22:49

SharonEllis · 07/03/2026 22:41

Nothing you can do. When I was a student I had a relationship with someone 12 years older than me. My parents knew the best thing was to accept it, show me love and support a d be there when I came to my senses and ended it.

Hoping she comes to her senses. Thank you

OP posts:
WallaceinAnderland · 07/03/2026 22:49

It's obviously just a fling in the uni years. I don't know why you would want to encourage a relationship at her age, just let her have fun.

JipJup · 07/03/2026 22:43

Sounds like she's just getting it out of her system OP.

She'll be experimenting with all sorts of things at uni that you cannot monitor.

All you can do is be there for her.

HairwEGo · 07/03/2026 22:42

Hmm 10 years. Both students. Both at same stage in life. He hasnt got power or influence as a professor etc, is what it is. You need to invite them both over for a meal/drinks get to know him and them as a couple!

SharonEllis · 07/03/2026 22:41

Nothing you can do. When I was a student I had a relationship with someone 12 years older than me. My parents knew the best thing was to accept it, show me love and support a d be there when I came to my senses and ended it.

shellyleppard · 07/03/2026 22:40

Op your thread title says it all ....
"Adult children".
Your daughter is nearly 20, independent (at university)and in a relationship.
She's a grown up.....so unless the other person is someone really dodgy I suggest you leave well alone

Theresaratinmykitchen1 · 07/03/2026 22:40

10yrs

OP posts:
SergeantWrinkles · 07/03/2026 22:39

Yeah. What’s the age gap op? Bit more info needed

herbalteabag · 07/03/2026 22:39

Theresaratinmykitchen1 · 07/03/2026 22:37

Sorry, met at uni. An older student. But lives on campus so don’t know how to monitor

You can't monitor it because they are an adult and can do what they like.

HairwEGo · 07/03/2026 22:38

An older student... but still how much older?

Theresaratinmykitchen1 · 07/03/2026 22:37

Sorry, met at uni. An older student. But lives on campus so don’t know how to monitor

OP posts:
HairwEGo · 07/03/2026 22:36

Really not enough info here!! Whats the age gap?? I was 18 at uni and now dh was 23, my parents considered that an age gap relationship. They had him over for sunday dinner and loved him, weve been together 18y this year...

Is he SIGNIFICANTLY older? In a position of trust??

BIWI · 07/03/2026 22:35

TBH it's actually none of your business.

JipJup · 07/03/2026 22:35

Ridiculous not to tell us what the age gap is.

You must know the thread will fill up with people asking??

Easterbunnygettingawrapping · 07/03/2026 22:35

Invite him over... Ime seeing your dd having a supportive family might make him see she isn't easily isolated and not that easy to make fall victim to his 'charms'..

EvangelineTheNightStar · 07/03/2026 22:32

DoubleBoubles · 07/03/2026 22:21

What’s the age gap and how did they meet?

Most importantl! Is it a professor?

randomchap · 07/03/2026 22:30

So she's dating an older man? How much older?

DoubleBoubles · 07/03/2026 22:21

What’s the age gap and how did they meet?

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