Does anyone else struggle to clean and tidy their house?

If you dont like the iron tablets from GP perhaps try floradix from Holland and barret

I thought that at first. Once perimenopause hit particularly. But after a few years, the grime builds up on the stuff that you don't bother to deep clean and then once you DO decide to do it it's much more difficult to clean. I know that little and often works as it's what I used to do, but then I had the energy for that during the week after work. Now I don't. And yes, I resent spending all my energy reserves on cleaning. DH isn't bothered either way.

So for now, we just bimble along looking at dusty skirting boards and marks on doors etc and sighing but then hardly ever doing anything about it. I keep telling myself "When I retire......" But will I have even less energy by then?! I can so see the advantages of downsizing into a flat, and not having a garden to maintain, or a garage and loft filled with crap.

Cleaner, obviously.

Well I have none of your issues (I WFH very part time, one kid flown the other away at uni, I am type 1 diabetic but that doesn’t affect my ability to do anything) and yet I still struggle with housework. I hate it and worse have the ability to ignore what needs doing. I really only clean properly when expecting guests! I also live alone so no one else to be bothered with my slovenly ways. I used to have a cleaver at my last house which was twice as big and both kids plus two dogs at home but can’t justify it now.

Agree with others saying to do micro jobs while waiting for things to happen - ie putting a wash on while the kettle is boiling or watering plants while heating up something in microwave. I give the kids bathroom upstairs a wipe over while they are taking a bath and I’m up there anyway.

toilets: squirt bleach down them every few days. It means you don’t have to clean for longer.
kitchen: fill sinks with hot water and bleach. Let it sit for 30-60 mins which lifts the stains and bacteria from the sink. Then use to wash down the kitchen, I find this easier and more thorough than spraying and rinsing cloth etc
floors: judge if a robotic hoover might work for your house. You can get one that mops as well these days
shower: rinse down with the handheld nozzle after you use it. I can’t remember when I last cleaned my shower, I just do this!

my 10 and 8 year old have been taught how to clean the bathroom and when I’m stretched I’ll pay them £5 to clean it. Toilet, sink, worktop, mirror, bath, floors, empty bin. They take ages and don’t do a perfect job but sometimes it’s worth it

I was always stuck in a rut and feel like I have finally got out of it this year. However I have also managed to fix my sleep issue so now wake up feeling good, instead of bad.

This is what I did to get on top of things -
I picked the worst rooms in the house in terms of clutter and mess - utility room, boys walk in wardrobe, bathroom and sitting room. Each saturday morning, I chose one of those rooms to de-clutter and deep clean. A full hour dedicated to cleaning the room was enough. By 10am I was done. It took 4 weeks to get through the 4 rooms.

Now I do daily tasks after dinner - wipe down kitchen, do dishwasher, unload washing machine. Other jobs are left for the weekend - bathrooms, hoovering, mopping. I pick one extra task per week - last week it was hoovering all the skirting boards, this week it was extra time spent in rooms we have done diy in.

I try to do everything early in the morning when I have more energy and haven't had time to procrastinate. I finally feel like I'm getting on top of things for the first time in my life.

It’s so hard when you work full time. Can you reduce your hrs at all? If financially and practically you can, it might be worth considering.

Spatone can work better than iron tablets. It’s gentler on the stomach and more easily absorbed.

Can the kids help with cleaning? Do a 15 min end of day team clean. Everyone gets different tasks. We’ve got a cordless Hoover and young kids can be quite good at running that around and using the small handheld attachment for the stairs.
Also a squirty mop that kids find fun.

There’s a few things to unpack here for me. For reference I work part time, have one child, lazy husband, and a cleaner. I’ve also had anemia in the past.

I would say:

1)it IS a lot. Working and running a home and caring for children (clubs!? Mines not that age yet). That’s why so many people have cleaners…

2)anemia can be hideous and debilitating. Would you consider an iron infusion privately? Costs £££ but honestly changed my life. I struggled with the tablets for years but could never get my levels up enough. And was hideous on the stomach (nausea, constiparon, ugh).

3)is there a clear reason for the anemia, in which case can you look to address this also? Sorry for giving you more to do when you’re exhausted … in my case GP fitted Mirena coil which stopped my hideous periods , that was my reason for anemia

Good luck with it. Honestly anemia can affect you mentally (brain fog), not just physically. I felt like I was struggling to make decisions.

Posting in solidarity. Lone parent, working full time and a couple of health conditions that can wipe me out at times. No money for a cleaner. House is far below what I'd like it to be. Feel I just about manage to keep us fed and in clean clothes at the minute!

No and never have but I think the trick is to put it away rather than put it down and I always found a huge amount could be done in 20 minutes and do it before sitting down and barely getting my coat off.

Bathroom: keep it clean as you go. Wash around basin and bog as the bath runs, clean the bath as you dry off. Squirt of cleaner on the floor and whizz a face flannel over ot with your foot on the way out.

Kitchen: wipe tops as you go, as kettle boils, quick cloth over unit doors after you unload the dishwasher. Put everything away immediately. May create an outlay but a ceramic/induction hob is an absolute lifesaver.

Life: yours and dc's clothes out the night before, book bags, shoes, PE kit, instruments lined up in the hall the night before.

Shopping: get a delivery pass and do it on-line.

Health: invest in a couple of appointments with a specialist physician with an interest in chronic fatigue/endocrinology. Get drug titrated to make sure the combination provides optimal support: iron, B3, HRT, vitamin D, thyroid, etc. It might cost a thousand with full blood tests but worth every penny if you have it. A kindly GP might agree to run the bloods for you to take.

I agree with this. It’s a lot. Never ending tbh

Im in my 40’s, work full time, two kids. Job is stressful and demanding.

I am either on top of the house or it’s a tip. Can’t seem to get a middle ground. I go through periods where I sleep well, have more energy and get things done. And periods where I have no energy for anything other than work, pick ups / drop offs etc.

I find it easier to keep on top of the house when I don’t let it get dirty - doing the kitchen every night before bed for example. I get sick of the fact that I’m the only one who does it. DH does some stuff
around the house but doesn’t place the same importance on cleaning as I do.

Of course it's a lot. That's why folk get cleaners. Working full time, cooking. Sorting out a family. It is a lot. IMHO. it's not just you.

Yes - iron bisglycinate. It’s the only form of iron I can take without side effects. Even Spatone messes with my digestion.

My iron levels are back up but I still struggle to keep the house clean and tidy. It’s been a never ending battle for me for my entire adult life.

Well, I’m older and the DC are at uni. So for the first time in decades I could clean my house more as at long long last I have the time. But I haven’t. In my case I’m not remotely struggling or worrying about it, it’s a choice. I do the minimum to keep things hygienic, apart from the kitchen where I am much more active as I love cooking and keeping the kitchen immaculate seems to come naturally. TBH does a bit of clutter and dust matter much? It doesn’t to me. I far prefer lazing around in my free time than cleaning every day!

I’m so happy to see this thread. I find it so hard to stay on top of it all and like I am drowning. I am a single parent and I work full time. My day is like this

Get up and ready
Work
Drop DC to school
Work
Pick DC up
Work
Do dinner/homework/chat with DC
Work
Bed

I have no time to keep on top of the house and when I do have a bit of time, I just want to zone out and switch off. I just about keep on top of washing and the dishwasher.

It’s been like this since Covid and I am completely burnt out.

Am hoping things will change when DC goes to secondary school in 2027. please tell me it does?

I keep a cleaning sponge tucked in the water pipes under the bathroom sinks and try a quick wipe round as soon as it look dusty and before grimy. A quick wipe of the loo top etc with a wad of loo roll and flush. Also keep an antibacterial spray hidden in bath room for a quick but more sanitising clean.

Just want to add to the expressions of solidarity. I find it really hard (and I only have one kid, and a small house, and no medical reasons for feeling knackered). I have definitely found it helpful to declutter but had to take some time off work to do this in an intensive burst and I realise you might not have the leave to spare for this. It's easier for me as my kid isn't at school yet so I don't have to save all leave for holidays. The odd holiday day dedicated to clearing up and decluttering helps to keep my ship afloat, even though it isn't exactly loads of fun. I also find that whilst I can keep on top of most tasks if I do little chunks daily, all it takes is a few days of me feeling particularly exhausted or demotivated and I end up behind, with loads built up, so I make up for this with a cleaning morning once a week on a weekend. I'd rather do this than run myself ragged every day.

Yanbu. I only work PT but I have a child with SEN who creates chaos so I'm always on catch up.

Very little storage and no, I'm not getting rid of much needed outdoor and running kit to save space.

Also, I do have a cleaner but I find tidying up for her quite stressful. We're struggling with storage at the moment and the whole house needs new units/wardrobes etc so until then there are piles of clothes etc and its stressful trying to fit all of that away just before she comes.

My older and wiser sister always says little and often. Having small children and working FT was the only time it was a bit difficult. DH and I both had long commutes in the opposite direction to each other as well. He did pull his weight though. How old are the kids and is there a partner about?

I found having as little possessions as possible helpful, including stuff like not having Knick knacks on the mantlepiece. Good storage is always needed A decent shoe rack in the hall and somewhere to hang bags and coats is very important. Always chuck out anything beyond repair.

You are definitely not alone. Working full-time, raising kids and running a household is absolutely tiring/exhausting, and you’ve got health issues on top of all that. Some will say “get a cleaner” but if you’re anything like me, there’s absolutely no money for a cleaner.
@likelysuspectgave a great list and advice above.
Stick to basics.
Make a list of the basics.
Write up a schedule or routines, from morning to night.
Set up routines, schedules and systems to help streamline your cleaning.
If meals take too long, research quicker simpler meals.

Its definitely easier to keep on top of things rather than do a massive blast at everything.

We make sure the kitchen is completely tidy and wiped down before bed. And that everywhere is kept generally tidy. So if you come in, your shoes, coat and bag go away where they belong. This has the added bonus of everything being where it should be the next time you need it.

We try to put all the clean laundry away as soon as it is ready. So nothing really piles up anywhere.

Then it is a case of cleaning the bathrooms, stripping and remaking the beds, vacuuming, mopping and dusting. Which doesnt take long if you're not tidying up before or as you do those jobs.

That's how we've managed to keep on top of things. And job distribution. It isnt just my responsibility to do all of those things. Everyone has a role to play.

I struggle too. Full time work, one hour commute each way 3 times a week. Kids at various clubs 4 days a week so minimal time at home. Old falling apart house with too much stuff in it. I know I need to declutter but I don't have time. Am always tired. I tend to do laundry, dishes, recycling and clean kitchen surfaces daily. Plus any life admin, stuff my parents need help with, and homework help. Weekly or when bad, I clean the bathrooms. My DH cooks and hoovers weekly.

But that misses deep cleans, windows, dusting, gardening, repairs, emptying the cupboards of out of date stuff etc etc etc. I feel like just giving up sometimes.

Don't underestimate the impact of your anaemia. That level of tiredness is another level. You literally dont have enough oxygen running around you.

Can you stretch to a cleaner for awhile, until youre feeling better?