To leave my house to my children and not my husband

This is a tricky one and I think you need to seek legal advice. The longer your DH and you live in this house together, paying the mortgage and the upkeep, the more claim he will have over the house if you die before him. No-one has a crystal ball and when you are dead you have no idea what your financial situation might be and whether your DH might suddenly think he is entitled to some share of the house - even it its just half of the current value, minus the deposit. The only way around this all might be to have the house put in a trust for your sons - there would be financial implications on doing this as you would have tax to pay up front but it would ensure that the property stays with your children. The only downside to this is that you are effectively giving it away and there is a chance that you might live to a ripe old age, fall out with your kids and get booted out of your own home when they control of the estate!!!! If you have a good life insurance policy then perhaps it might be better to rely on this for the care of your children and not worry about the house - not sure where you are in the country or how much it is worth, but in order to get this set in stone it might cause more trouble than its worth.

I think the negative responses you have gotten are in part due to drip feeding important details such as your children are still kids and the details about their das. (I am sure lesson learned on that one! 😅) And them also I'm part cos you stated your husband is paying half the mortgage on a house you own solo and don't intend to leave any share of to him, even though you aren't hurting for money. You mentioned you paid the deposit but not what percentage of the house it was or how old you are etc (if it was 10 percent and he has paid the mortgage 40years for example, that sounds pretty shitty, if it was 50% and being paying mortgage for 2yrs...not so much)

I might be worth suggesting he only pays half the bills not including mortgage and invests elsewhere in case of worse case scenario, In the name of "fairness". I know people will say, if he was renting he would also paying rent, but with a 6figure salary it's unlikely he would be renting rather than paying down a mortgage on a property he owned. But at the same time, if he knows you intended to leave it solely to your kids and is still happy to pay, then that's no one elses business.

You have probably had enough advice on the actual point of the post and said you will see a lawyer,so not much point commenting on that.

Not sure if its been stated multiple times but marriage automatically invalidates any previous wills ..so if this is the case ..you need a new will nd to discuss your wishes with a solicitor and your DH

If you’d read the OP’s posts (there is an option just to read all the OP’s posts if you don’t want to read the whole thread) she has said numerous times that this would only apply if she dies before the children are 18, and she will change her will once they are adults.

How immature.

Christ 😮

This is what I do for work OP, and not leaving him at least the right to stay for a period of time, is very wrong. What happens if he’s very elderly and you die first?

Do you not like your husband?

Only if it was made AFTER you got married or included a contemplation of marriage clause.

You should leave a life interest to your husband. There’s nothing wrong with not leaving the house to him, but don’t make the poor guy homeless. No decent solicitor would advise a will written that way.

I think he would have a very good claim on the house as it is his home. At least to remain in it. Be difficult to evict him imho. Best solution is to allow him to remain in the house for his lifetime. Thats more usual under your circumstances

In theory yes, you both need legal advice and your will needs to state that you disinherit him.

Does he pay towards the mortgage and could he prove it? If so it becomes more complicated.

You are absolutely right to do this.
I had a relative that re married, no will.
She and her new husband were in an accident, she died instantly, which meant her home was passed to her husband.
He died as a result of his injuries a few weeks later.
The house was then passed to her new husbands family.
Her children got nothing.

Then there's no issue is there?

If you do this, discuss it with him first and perhaps make some provision for him, but I've heard of a partner remarrying, being outlived by the new partner and them giving it all to their kids, so definitely protect your kids.

If you really want to make this water tight you could always consider putting the house into trust now with the children as trustees so it would avoid probate and IHT, it might also protect you from having to pay care costs in the future etc as well but has some disadvantages in terms of the trust then owns the house and there would be CGT and stuff to consider - it’s definitely an option to get some advice about though.

But it would revert to the children anyway if the OP's husband had the house if she dies first, and then he died!

@exprecis · Today 07:35

So effectively you are taking money from him to pay for an asset that you plan to give to your children, potentially leaving him homeless. Lovely!
Setting aside the legalities, you at least owe him full information about this.

This. ^ @Moiraroseee I think what you are doing is quite cold-hearted and unkind. Your poor husband. And you laughed at this response?! Imagine if this was a man doing this to a woman? This thread would be on fire! You are being hugely unreasonable. He is paying towards the mortgage by paying for household bills and the like! He needs to get advice from a solicitor and get his name on the deeds.

This, with bells on!

I see from your update that you are planning to consult a solicitor which, yes, you really need to do (one that specialises in estate planning). Regardless of what your husband says he will do, if you were to drop dead tomorrow and you had a simple will that just left your house to your children, your husband could contest the will. He may or may not be successful, but it will add stress and uncertainty (and costs!) to what will be a horrible time for your kids.

So, speak to someone qualified, and also talk to them about managing IHT, particularly as you said you were a high earner.

Surely in the event of the death of the mother, generally the assumption would be that, if he is a loving and responsible father and is in their lives, the children would go and live with their father rather than stay with their step father? I’d assume that would usually be a child’s preference, and most fathers would want to have their child reside with them full time if their mother died too.

Bizarre post. Your husband owns 50% as he has contributed to the mortgage. Very odd you would want their home to be sold after you died. Do they not live with you? Is it not their childhood home? Would the kids just go to their dads? How would he grieve? Kids need consistency. If you trust your husband and he supports you, then managing it with him makes the most sense. Can’t understand why he wouldn’t continue to look out for your kids under those (legal) wishes.