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AIBU?

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Original poster

Pillow, pillows, PILLOWS!

137 replies

TheBeaTgoeson1 · 05/03/2026 19:31

Am I being unreasonable in that I can never find the perfect pillow!

Even when I sleep somewhere, and look at the exact pillow, and buy the same thing, it never seems to be the same, so I’m asking for help, can anyone hit me with your perfect pillow suggestions?

… and yes, I understand they are individual! But I’m looking for something that’s plump but soft, and keeps it shape.

Also, does anybody else really struggle to get the perfect pillow?

OP posts:
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11
goz · 05/03/2026 19:42

The dunlopillo is the perfect pillow.

Jamfirstnotcream · 05/03/2026 19:41

FizzingAda · 05/03/2026 19:36

I've tried,so many pillows - I had a frozen shoulder, so if I sleep on my side with my shoulder hunched it niggles it. Feather pillows tend to flatten during the night so you wake up with your neck to one side and achey. I've found that a pillow with a central dip helps and I've got a memory foam one that helps a!ot and prevents neck ache, it it’s a bit long front to back and is a bit too firm, so still searching for the perfect one. Best of luck!

This is why I got one set firm ( bottom) and one set medium ( top)
No issues at all

BatsInHibernation · 05/03/2026 19:41

Smallwins · 05/03/2026 19:40

Cervical pillows all the way here! I tried one a year ago after multiple neck pains/frozen shoulders and haven't looked back. They look ridiculous but are so comfy but supportive. I had to add a thin firm pillow under it for side sleeping to accommodate my broad shoulders.
Amazon have plenty on the around 30-40 range and the two I've tried (one for home and one for campervan) are both spot on

Edited

Oh I have such a crunchy perimenopausal neck and shoulder pain! I shall scuttle off down this cervical pillow rabbit hole immediately.

Pleasealexa · 05/03/2026 19:41

Oh thank you for this....I'm struggling with this issue. I have six pillows that I've bought and none are good. I don't seem to have as much of an issue when staying in hotels so feel there is a holy grail.

BatsInHibernation · 05/03/2026 19:40

I agree with goose down. I have some from marks and some from Julien somewhere which are the 'hotel' ones.
I'm creeping towards wool ones though. I have a wool duvet and I am a happy convert with a rusty crispy duvet FINALLY

Smallwins · 05/03/2026 19:40

Cervical pillows all the way here! I tried one a year ago after multiple neck pains/frozen shoulders and haven't looked back. They look ridiculous but are so comfy but supportive. I had to add a thin firm pillow under it for side sleeping to accommodate my broad shoulders.
Amazon have plenty on the around 30-40 range and the two I've tried (one for home and one for campervan) are both spot on

TheYorkshirePudding · 05/03/2026 19:37

seriouslynonames · 05/03/2026 19:36

I have never found that elusive perfect pillow and I seem to be very sensitive to the wrong pillow. DH calls me the princess and the pea...

I am still on the hunt and in the meantime we have loft full of rejected pillows!

Sorry I can't be more help!

We are the same! Recently he marched out and bought two costing £100 but they weren’t right either! Another set cast aside!

seriouslynonames · 05/03/2026 19:36

I have never found that elusive perfect pillow and I seem to be very sensitive to the wrong pillow. DH calls me the princess and the pea...

I am still on the hunt and in the meantime we have loft full of rejected pillows!

Sorry I can't be more help!

FizzingAda · 05/03/2026 19:36

I've tried,so many pillows - I had a frozen shoulder, so if I sleep on my side with my shoulder hunched it niggles it. Feather pillows tend to flatten during the night so you wake up with your neck to one side and achey. I've found that a pillow with a central dip helps and I've got a memory foam one that helps a!ot and prevents neck ache, it it’s a bit long front to back and is a bit too firm, so still searching for the perfect one. Best of luck!

Enko · 05/03/2026 19:35

I feel your pain. I struggle and I nedd an orthopedic pillow to sleep. There are not many

Currently have a tempur and a Elvirus. They are both memory foam

TheYorkshirePudding · 05/03/2026 19:35

My husband struggles! He’s a side sleeper at first but then lays on his back during the night. He has broad shoulders and tries to keep his head aligned to his spine so it can’t be a pillow made of nothing otherwise his head is on a funny angle.

I’m also starting to struggle.. I want a soft ‘let me sink’ pillow but also conscious that I need support (now DH has mentioned the neck thing). I’m a side sleeper.

I would love some help!!

Jamfirstnotcream · 05/03/2026 19:34

This has been my lifelong search
Marks and Spencer Duck feather and Down
£39.50
One set firm one set medium
Heaven