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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

I know I am, but think I'll probably still do it.

30 replies

Binding · 04/03/2026 17:57

I do some part time work. Occasionally I take on some extra. I don't especially want the extra hours or money, but if I'm free I'll do it to help out.

Last time, I took on something outside of my normal role and, imo, was unfairly critised. It wasn't perfect, but it was a decent first attempt imo. It wasn't constructive feedback, it was "having a go" criticism.

So, I've been asked to do another one. This is also outside my usual role, but closer to what I usually do. I could do it, but I'm not inclined to help out after what happened last time.

But, the person who gets the headache if I don't, isn't the person who criticised my last effort. That person will, however, overview it again.

OP posts:
pimplebum · 04/03/2026 18:13

Explain that you are really reluctant because of what happened last time

Sidebeforeself · 04/03/2026 18:11

No I wouldnt be doing it again. Not because I cant take criticism etc but the person who “had a go” didnt appreciate my time and effort

bigyellowduster · 04/03/2026 18:10

I’d say ‘after the criticism I got last time from
x I’m not inclined to do it again, sorry’ that way the person who gets the headache knows exactly who to blame and doesn’t think you’re just being awkward.

Original poster
Binding · 04/03/2026 18:10

Shithotlawyer · 04/03/2026 18:01

Could you ask the critical senior person what they'd want you to do differently if you were to do it again? also have they any oversight of resourcing- if peers are sharing out the work but it's not going to people with the right skills that's hardly your fault.

Everyone (including her) knew I wasn't qualified or experienced in that task, but they were desperate and I agreed to give it a go.

I know now what I should have done differently, and if it had been handled differently, would have been glad to have the coaching and development, but that's not how feedback was delivered.

OP posts:
Shithotlawyer · 04/03/2026 18:01

Could you ask the critical senior person what they'd want you to do differently if you were to do it again? also have they any oversight of resourcing- if peers are sharing out the work but it's not going to people with the right skills that's hardly your fault.