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Original poster

Keeping DD off school due to period

260 replies

Girlymum26 · 04/03/2026 12:28

My DD is 10 years old and is in year 5 at school and just started her period for the first time on Sunday evening this week and she came and told me as soon as she noticed.

We have had plenty of chats about it and she’s had the lessons in school so knows all about it and why she had them and even about changing pads and she seemed to take it in her stride, although a little bit embarrassed.

I was at work on Monday and Tuesday this week and my husband made her go to school as he does the drop of these days and said it’s “just a period” and that she couldn’t stay off school for it. I had no say in it as start work at 6am.

She’s leaked both Monday and Tuesday and she said she’s really sore where her pads have been rubbing her skin and leaking and her tummy hurts so I’ve kept her off today as it’s my day off.

Ive given her some calpol, some sudocreme for her sore rash and ordered some of the lil-lets teen pads which are more narrow so shouldn’t rub anymore and got some period pants too to protect against any leaks. We are just having a quiet girly day to help her get to grips with it all but I’ve explained she will need to go to school tomorrow and Friday.

I’ve called school and explained why she wasn’t in and they were really sympathetic and her teacher called me back and has said she can go to toilet during lessons if she wants to change her pad as it was turns out she was too embarrassed to change it when anyone else was in the bathroom at the same time and that is she’s going to struggle with PE this week they won’t make her do it.

Husband is not happy I’ve kept her off and said I’m making a rod for my own back even though I’ve explained it’s just for today, to help her out a bit.

AIBU to have kept her off do you think?

OP posts:
Watchoutfortheslowaraf · 04/03/2026 13:28

Having never experienced a period, your husband does not get a say. She is ten years old and only year 5 ffs! It’s not ‘just a period’ right now- it’s a very big deal to her and something that many of her peers won’t be experiencing yet. You absolutely did the right thing for her

arethereanyleftatall · 04/03/2026 13:28

i really really hope for all your sakes that your husband isn’t ordinarily the completely misogynistic cunt he sounds here. How utterly vile and dismissive of him. Yanbu.

Catza · 04/03/2026 13:26

I am a little torn on this. On one hand, I absolutely don't think your husband gets to have an opinion on this unless he is sporting a uterus. On the other hand, I'd hate for your daughter to think that period is some kind of an illness that needs to be managed with time off school. So I think, I would make it clear that this is a one off helping her to process a big change in life and next month will be business as usual.
Having said that, I had awful period pains as a child and could really use some time off school a few times. Alas, there was no such option offered.

Member984815 · 04/03/2026 13:00

It's her first one , she might feel a bit emotional aswell as being sore it'll do her no harm this once and the teacher sounds like they are supportive for next time

Chamomileteaplease · 04/03/2026 12:48

Your husband sounds really uncaring 😟.

Starting your very first period on a Sunday night?! Poor thing. Of course it takes a while to get to know how to manage it all and home is the best place to to that.

Plus stomache.

I hope her day with you has helped her to get used to it whilst in a safe environment and she will be better prepared next month, both physically and mentally.

Maybe remind your husband that yes she will be fine in time but it's her first time! Ugh.

Merryoldgoat · 04/03/2026 12:47

YANBU but you need to ensure your daughter can advocate for herself. She needs to not see her period as an embarrassment and be able to use the toilet as needed regardless of who is in the vicinity.

I remember girls being crippled with anxiety and embarrassment when they had their period at school and it was really awful for them.

SoMentallyDrained · 04/03/2026 12:46

When was your husband's last period? Oh, he hasn't had one? No say then unfortunately.

BudgetBuster · 04/03/2026 12:43

Fairly obvious your husband is oblivious to the shit women have to endure for the vast majority of their lives.... and starting at the young age of 10 I'd say she's taking it in her stride.

The teacher sounds great, and absolutely you are right to let her have one day off at this hugely defining (and obviously uncomfortable) time of her life.

MargeryBargery · 04/03/2026 12:41

I teach year 5 and I absolutely back you up in this.

They're still very young and being among the first to start takes some processing and getting used to.

Duvetdayneeded · 04/03/2026 12:35

First period? Why not. Sounds like she’s having a rough time and as long as she knows it’s a one off, fine. Pads need to be made so they open quietly… why are manufacturers not tackling this! I used to spend ages opening it very slowly so no one would know. Missing the odd pe lesson isnt going to hurt either.

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