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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to ask this without expecting a backlash?

284 replies

Fleurflowering · 03/03/2026 22:14

I know that people will accuse me of being goady etc, but I would like to ask these questions without a tirade of hate being posted at me. I'm genuinely ignorant about this and want to understand it better.

I was born in 1978. When I was at school, there was a flicker of a mention of autism, but it didn't seem to be commonplace.

Did children have autism? Did ADHD exist then? Or are these new problems and why have they arisen?

Every school class seems to have children with SEND - autism being very common. But, when I was at school, there were "Remedial" classes, but behaviour was nowhere near as bad as it seems to be nowadays and teachers didn't need to differentiate lessons like they have to now. I hear so many people saying that their kids are on the spectrum, or that they themselves have autism.

I also don't remember any school refusers. Is this a new mental health symptom, or are children more autonomous and possibly less resilient nowadays?

I know I'll be flamed, but I'm not denying these conditions exist. I'm trying to learn whether they are new or not.

OP posts:
HelenaWaiting · 04/03/2026 07:34

Octavia64 · 03/03/2026 22:28

Autism was first described in a paper by Kanner in 1943. Asperger was working independently at a similar time and described Asperger’s syndrome and it took a few years before it was considered they were two manifestations of autism.

there was a LOT of research and work on autism in the 50s and it was thought it was caused by mothers not parenting well enough.

https://www.autism.org.uk/advice-and-guidance/what-is-autism/the-history-of-autism

in the 1970s in the U.K. not everyone was entitled to an education. Some children were deemed uneducable and not allowed to go to school. Private schools for these children developed through the 50s and 60s but in the 70s there was a big push to allow every child a state education and schools specially for uneducable children were built by the state.

children with autism would not have been in the same schools that “normal” children were in because they were not allowed to be.

In 1978 there was the warlock report followed by a new law in 1981 that allowed children with disabilities (who had previously been deemed uneducable) into mainstream schools if they wanted to.

previously they were not allowed in mainstream schools and had to go to special school,

Well, this is some serious nonsense. All children have been entitled to an education since an Act of Parliament in 1970. Secondly, it is the WARNOCK report. Mary Warnock, iirc. It wasn't a report prepared by a warlock!

Starlight7080 · 04/03/2026 07:33

What a daft question. Of course they existed. You just didnt notice or did but put it down to something else.
In the 1970s it was still considered fine to hit kids in school. Imagine how many kids with adhd and such got hit instead of help!

PrincessFairyWren · 04/03/2026 07:33

Rote learning, clear expectations and explicit teaching methods were used more in the past which are more effective for a lot of ASD students. Plus leaving school at 14 was not uncommon whereas a child of that age would be a school refuser now.
A lot of children with severe autism or intellectual disabilities in the past were in institutions and deprived of proper nutrition and adequate healthcare as subsequently died prematurely.

There are also higher rates of survival of premature births which is associated with autism.

However I find your OP extremely distasteful. You could have googled “increase in autism diagnosis rates” or read any number of the other threads on the topic but you thought you would be a dick and start your own. Of course we can fast forward to the bit where you blame us parents and get it over and done with.

Tshirtblanket · 04/03/2026 07:30

I absolutely think there were people in my school and family who were undiagnosed.
Also modern lifestyles and environments can amplify the impact of autism on individuals.

BUT
I have worked in special education for over 20 years now and in that time there has been a marked increase in the number of children with very complex autism profiles. We have whole classes of children with extreme sensory needs whereas when I started there were one or two in the school and it was a rarity.
I think there’s a theory that if autism intensifies down the generations we are now seeing the results of multiple generations of ‘high functioning’ autistic people meeting and having children whereas decades ago fewer people left their communities and therefore had fewer opportunities to meet other ND people.
I’ve explained that crudely as I’m in a rush but there is definitely more autism around now.

Katemax82 · 04/03/2026 07:28

When my son was diagnosed in 2010 it was 1% of the population had ASD. Now it feels a lot higher. I think in old days the less severe autism wasn't diagnosed and those people (like my daughter) would just struggle horribly in silence

Ilikemytea · 04/03/2026 07:28

'Autistic children need screen time - they learn from it. '

No one 'needs' screens. It's a convenience tool we all have access to, that some use more than others because it's there and easily accessed, but not because they 'need' it.

There is a massive drive just now to see any differences as ADHD and autism, and yes, both are diagnosed more often as there are lower thresholds for both now. Because it's in media and everyday discussions, people see it more too. I know someone who was diagnosed who sees it in everyone - her one sided view is frustrating.

There is also a lot of incorrect information on social media and in everyday discussions about both conditions, with random stuff added to list of symptoms.

Lougle · 04/03/2026 07:21

Globules · 03/03/2026 23:00

As a teacher, I can say it is far more prevalent now. It's not being over diagnosed either. There has been an increase in children with ASD/ADHD.

I remember the Reception class I taught in 2004 had 1 diagnosed lad with ASD. In the 3 classes preceding, I'd taught about 100 children. Only 2 of those 100 would have a diagnosis today.

There weren't more special schools around where pupils with these needs were attending. And thinking back to how society was in 90s/2000s, you didn't see so many needs in the community, as I don't believe they were there.

My friend set up a weekend club for primary age children with ASD in 2002. There were 15 places in the club. The team struggled to fill the places, despite being recommended by the LA SEN team to families. The city had 250000 residents.

It's been debated for a while as to the cause of the increase in numbers.

I do agree with this. When DD1 was in preschool, I was on the management committee. We had about 60 children on roll (some only did one morning per week, etc.) and we had 2 children who received extra funding for 1:1 support, DD1 and another girl. DD1 went on to get a Statement of Special Educational Needs (old version of today's EHCP) and went to special school. The other girl was given an Inclusion Partnership Agreement (a non-statutory document which set out her needs and what the school needed to do to help her) and went to mainstream.

Even then, though, in 2009, I remember an older Head Teacher of a local infant school showing me around and at the end she leaned into me and said "If you're offered a special school, grab it with both hands and run to accept it. They're like gold dust." Another HT said "Get the best Statement you can possibly get because I won't be able to meet her needs unless it's really good." A third HT, when I asked how they kept the children from crossing the white boundary line into the road (DD1 was a runner) just rolled his eyes and said "The children know the rules." Interestingly, we had a year R transfer from that school into DD1's special school because the child evidently didn't get the memo.

3 years later, in 2012 I was desperately trying to find DD2 a new primary school. She had ASD but was undiagnosed and nobody would listen because she was passive. She'd been to two schools and had to leave both due to EBSA. I had home educated for a term to reset. I looked around a school and the HT said to me "Please don't bring her here. I technically have a space but the class she would go into has so much SEN, I could throw another 5 adults in there and it wouldn't be enough. You say that nobody believes she has ASD. If she comes here, you'd have your evidence within about 3 weeks because it would be so terrible for her, but it would destroy her. " We then found a small 100 place primary school, who met her needs and realised she had ASD and referred for assessment.

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 04/03/2026 07:21

HoppingPavlova · 04/03/2026 04:08

@MyTrivia The diagnostic process for autism is complex and requires several practitioners

That’s just not true for the vast number of adults being diagnosed. That’s where the problem lies, all these people who believe they have autism, have always had it, have Googled for millions of hours and then get a diagnosis. Do they have autism, or are they putting forward all the information relevant to autism.

To be blunt, it’s not foolproof for adults at all. I had a colleague in my previous workplace, who did not have autism, but was fascinated that at a certain point, every single person who gained a position (after seemingly not having it during training), suddenly announcing their autism and requirement for adjustments, which meant the running of the department became a nightmare. So, they went and got a diagnosis of autism. Was not complex. Did not involve several practitioners. Was exactly as I have known for other adults who have been diagnosed. Simple and one practitioner. The most complex thing was the waiting time, everything else was incredibly simple. Subsequent to their diagnosis of autism, that they didn’t have, they then couldn’t work for 6 months (the time the public employee gives as paid sick leave) while they ‘processed’ their disability. Then they returned and demanded the same accomodations everyone else had which was not really feasible given they ran the department. They were just sick of everyone taking the piss and the cause being an unsustainable department they were expected to run, so thought they’d give it back. Couldn’t blame them. They agreed to take a public service redundancy ($$$$) and then immediately moved into private work - without their autism. I have an adult child with Asperger’s/ADHD/GAD/OCD/Bipolar and am incredibly sympathetic to people with divergences who need support, but let’s not pretend there is not a lot of people taking the piss in the current environment.

Actually when I was diagnosed with ASD in 2000, I had had to see six different people in person over the course of several months. And that was as a middle aged adult.

Shortpoet · 04/03/2026 07:20

My brother was described by doctors as “hyperactive” as he just couldn’t sit still. One teach scoffed at this and said she didn’t believe it, he was just naughty. He got diagnosed aged 45 with ADHD through his work.

I was described by parents and teachers as “a daydreamer”. I’ve not been assessed but I have a lot of traits of inattentive ADHD as an adult. So who knows. Maybe that would be picked up in today’s school system.

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 04/03/2026 07:18

firstofallimadelight · 04/03/2026 06:23

There was a handful of kids in my school who were naughty/ weird/ thick. I was one of them, I was bullied for being a weirdo. It was horrible and I struggled to engage in school.
my sons school has 90 kids in his year. 30 have Sen plans.
my school had (Roughly) 40 kids and I can think of 6 including my self who were nd but there was probably more who hid it well.
A lot more Sen kids were in institutions or just at home deemed inappropriate for education. My ds was non verbal and not toilet trained until 7 he would not have been in mainstream.

I do think society has become more challenging for Sen children, the rigidity of education, the need for childcare at a young age, the fast pace. There’s children who maybe would have got by in past times who can’t cope now.

I don’t know - school was very rigid in the 1970s (I remember doing exams at about age 7) and there were no concessions made for anything, many (including me) had two full time working parents etc.

The reason we survived (barely) was that we had no choice but to do so. We couldn’t tell parents or teachers we were struggling as we would have been in trouble. So we learnt to mask very efficiently and internalised everything.

TroysMammy · 04/03/2026 07:15

Wednesdaysotherchild · 03/03/2026 22:30

My grandma took my mum (as a child) to the GP in the late 50s, saying there was something not quite right with her (well-meaning). Turns out it was inattentive ADHD… I also have it. Judging by his behaviour so did my Grandfather!

Edited

Years ago my mother was told by her sister-in-law that my Dad was taken to the Doctors when he was young because of "his funny little ways". My mother never asked my Auntie for any more information and now my Auntie has passed away and my Dad is the only one left out of the 12 there is now way of knowing what she meant. However things I know of and seen over the years have been slotting into place that he is most probably autistic. He's in his 80s now.

EvangelicalAboutButteredToast · 04/03/2026 07:13

I have think they are going to find that maternal obesity play a part once all the studies are completed but I’m sure pollution and microplastics are also involved.

CopeNorth · 04/03/2026 06:59

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 03/03/2026 22:21

I’m mid 50s and was diagnosed with autism 5 years ago (and ADHD a year ago). Looking back it was obvious and several of my classmates clearly had it.

I spent 50 years of my life with hardly any friends (including at school) so yes it was a thing but no, it wasn’t recognised or tested then.

Yes. I was diagnosed with ADHD as an adult. I masked all the way through school, university and work. I just don’t think people parented or taught like they do now.

I recall the psychiatrist saying even 10 years ago lots of medical professionals just didn’t think adults could have ADHD.

firstofallimadelight · 04/03/2026 06:23

There was a handful of kids in my school who were naughty/ weird/ thick. I was one of them, I was bullied for being a weirdo. It was horrible and I struggled to engage in school.
my sons school has 90 kids in his year. 30 have Sen plans.
my school had (Roughly) 40 kids and I can think of 6 including my self who were nd but there was probably more who hid it well.
A lot more Sen kids were in institutions or just at home deemed inappropriate for education. My ds was non verbal and not toilet trained until 7 he would not have been in mainstream.

I do think society has become more challenging for Sen children, the rigidity of education, the need for childcare at a young age, the fast pace. There’s children who maybe would have got by in past times who can’t cope now.

Shuffletoesxtreme · 04/03/2026 06:21

I was born in the 70s and remember helping out in the bottom/remedial maths set for lower years and, looking back, most of those kids had undiagnosed neurodiversity of some kind.

Strawberrryfields · 04/03/2026 06:17

Yes was definitely around. As others have said I can think of several classmates who I think would now have a diagnosis. And surely others who were masking.

I think there is a lot of self-diagnosis going on which will make the numbers higher. Also people who use it flippantly to describe themselves means we hear it a lot more - similarly to a few years ago there was a trend for clean and tidy people to say they were ocd which is not at all the same.

In terms of an actual increase in numbers I think older parents could be a factor.

ODD I’m less sure about as a diagnosis.

LoftyPlumLion · 04/03/2026 06:07

Over diagnosis is definitely a thing. My DP has decided (sorry self diagnosed) they are ADHD

there does feel a large piece of this is to expect more allowances from people.

i do think these conditions exist but too many people currently claim they have them.

if you think you have behaviors that match them understand the triggers and learn to control them. Don’t just expect others to make greater allowances for them.

ebfwtf · 04/03/2026 06:03

Helplessandheartbroke · 03/03/2026 22:27

Ipads do not cause autism, youre born with it

No, but they might cause behaviours that get diagnosed as autism/adhd

MontgomeryClift · 04/03/2026 05:54

@cricketnut77No, there’s not more people ‘with’ adhd/autism now. There are more people with a diagnosis of adhd/autism. Two completely different things.

Young people with adhd/autism are much more susceptible to relying on and getting addicted to screens/tablets/phones. Just as people with adhd have always been susceptible to drug/drink/other risky behaviours. Screens haven’t caused anything.

The rigidity of the current school system has led to kids not being able to cope in that environment and this is why adhd/autism is ‘seen’ more by the general public and talked about.

@GentleSheepNo, there wasn’t far less of it, see above.

@OneisallandallisoneYes, OP is ill informed, she’s admitted it. That doesn’t make her an arsehole, your dismissive tone makes you one though.

@FleurfloweringI hope you gain a better understanding reading the other more insightful and considered posts on here from people with lived experience.

HoppingPavlova · 04/03/2026 04:08

@MyTrivia The diagnostic process for autism is complex and requires several practitioners

That’s just not true for the vast number of adults being diagnosed. That’s where the problem lies, all these people who believe they have autism, have always had it, have Googled for millions of hours and then get a diagnosis. Do they have autism, or are they putting forward all the information relevant to autism.

To be blunt, it’s not foolproof for adults at all. I had a colleague in my previous workplace, who did not have autism, but was fascinated that at a certain point, every single person who gained a position (after seemingly not having it during training), suddenly announcing their autism and requirement for adjustments, which meant the running of the department became a nightmare. So, they went and got a diagnosis of autism. Was not complex. Did not involve several practitioners. Was exactly as I have known for other adults who have been diagnosed. Simple and one practitioner. The most complex thing was the waiting time, everything else was incredibly simple. Subsequent to their diagnosis of autism, that they didn’t have, they then couldn’t work for 6 months (the time the public employee gives as paid sick leave) while they ‘processed’ their disability. Then they returned and demanded the same accomodations everyone else had which was not really feasible given they ran the department. They were just sick of everyone taking the piss and the cause being an unsustainable department they were expected to run, so thought they’d give it back. Couldn’t blame them. They agreed to take a public service redundancy ($$$$) and then immediately moved into private work - without their autism. I have an adult child with Asperger’s/ADHD/GAD/OCD/Bipolar and am incredibly sympathetic to people with divergences who need support, but let’s not pretend there is not a lot of people taking the piss in the current environment.

PermanentlyExhaustedPigeonZZZ · 04/03/2026 03:39

My understanding is there are two things,

  1. More recognised and diagnosed
  2. It's genetic, and since the increase in acceptance and the internet and online dating (!) more neuro divergent people are finding their people and having neuro divergent children.
SweetnsourNZ · 04/03/2026 03:32

Years ago we used to hear the word eccentric to describe neighbours, relatives etc who were a bit different. They were probably autistic.

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 04/03/2026 03:27

stopthemud · 04/03/2026 02:26

I am 5 years in age and 5 years in Dx behind you. How did your friendship situation change? I have been officially recently Dx with inattentive ADHD awaiting Austism. I have no friends, well one who lives far away. I am going through a patch now where I really feel it. Other times I am completely happy by myself.

Like you, I was always on my own and happy with that.

Once you have the dx, whilst it’s a relief, I found I had to basically learn to understand myself and see why I do xyz.

This has taken the last 5 years or so but because I know more about myself (rather than feeling like the ‘odd’ one), I feel more able to navigate life, friendships etc and it has given me a lot of confidence.

i still don’t ‘need’ people in general on an emotional level but I have a closer relationship with those with whom I ‘click’ as it is like now I know myself better, i let them know the real me (if that makes sense!).

As a direct result, since my ADHD diagnoses as well, I have moved into working within my absolute passion, working with someone who is very similar to me, equally passionate, and ‘gets’ me.And my AuDHD brain is actually an advantage.

This has changed my quality of life, of course there are times that I struggle but I am working with my conditions now and not against them.

sorry, that was long!

feel free to PM me if you want to chat 😊

83048274j · 04/03/2026 03:24

nolongersurprised · 04/03/2026 02:09

Maybe, but it all ends up as the same diagnosis, doesn’t it? So maybe too early and too much screen exposure has contributed to increased diagnosis rates.

Yes, but one diagnosis may be accurately autism, the other symptoms misdiagnosed. We might need another tool to distinguish autism from children who have just had too much screen time.

MermaidMummy06 · 04/03/2026 03:15

Yes. I've come to the realisation I am autistic after having 2DC with autism. It explains a lot as to why I've always struggled to fit in and make friends.

My uncle was labelled an a*hole and he was, really. But hugely successful. It's obvious from his behaviour he is as well. It's obvious DM & DB have ADHD.

People always had it. You were just labelled as something negative. You learned to get on with it. To mask. There was no alternative. It was horrendous but you hide your differences.