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AIBU?

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Original poster

To think colleagues joke was NOT acceptable?

471 replies

LaurenkI · 02/03/2026 18:10

My team has a meeting every Monday (virtual) and there’s always chat at the start about weekends etc. One of my colleagues said he’s worrying because his holiday plans for the year include already booked trips to Cyprus and Dubai. Another colleague then said ‘any chance you can book a trip to France next’ and he got a few laughs.

I have family in France, as does another colleague I’m aware of. Is it me or is this type of ‘joke’ really inappropriate given the current climate?

OP posts:
Skates · 03/03/2026 19:40

LaurenkI · 02/03/2026 18:34

I’ll leave that to my manager to deal with when she returns tomorrow and has an email from me to pick up.

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Omg. So you would get someone in trouble over a stupid joke. English take the piss out of the French and they do the same to us. I have 2 French mates and the names they call me and English people in general. It’s what we do. Lighten up and don’t be so woke

Coralielu · 03/03/2026 19:31

LaurenkI · 02/03/2026 20:35

Not in my experience, I’ve always found the Dfrench to be extremely hospitable on my numerous visits over the years.

They’d not sink to such depths.

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Oh my she used Dfrench, Darling French 😂she is completely unhinged!

Coralielu · 03/03/2026 19:23

LaurenkI · 02/03/2026 18:44

That’s for them to decide, they’ll need to acknowledge my grievance though and I expect seek guidance from HR on any next steps.

I flagged an equally inappropriate ‘joke’ by another colleague a couple of years ago and I know they were warned as to their future conduct.

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I’m a French and a managers. This is not offensive and you’re really overreacting. I can imagine to you’re manager and their HR partner having a very good laugh over this

user1464187087 · 03/03/2026 19:22

TaliaTalia · 03/03/2026 19:07

You sound absolutely insufferable.

i am Israeli, half Arab, family and friends all in Israel, in the Wesr Bank, in Gaza, in Iran among other places in the Middle East. People with an actual chance of getting seriously hurt. You know how we cope? We joke about sirens getting us out of work, or that the airspace is closed so our annoying mother in law can’t come to visit. And that’s probably the mildest of it.

Your colleague made a joke absolutely not aimed at your family or friends who are currently living in safety and you’re making complaints to HR about it. Oh to have the energy for such ridiculous things.

Great post and I totally agree.
Having said that I wish your family and friends health and happiness. It must be incredibly scary. 😥

TaliaTalia · 03/03/2026 19:07

You sound absolutely insufferable.

i am Israeli, half Arab, family and friends all in Israel, in the Wesr Bank, in Gaza, in Iran among other places in the Middle East. People with an actual chance of getting seriously hurt. You know how we cope? We joke about sirens getting us out of work, or that the airspace is closed so our annoying mother in law can’t come to visit. And that’s probably the mildest of it.

Your colleague made a joke absolutely not aimed at your family or friends who are currently living in safety and you’re making complaints to HR about it. Oh to have the energy for such ridiculous things.

LBFseBrom · 03/03/2026 19:03

PrizedPickledPopcorn · 02/03/2026 18:13

I think it depends how you interpret it. I’d hear that as ‘book somewhere nearer and safer next time and you’ll have a better chance of getting there!’. So I wouldn’t hear it as insensitive or inappropriate. It’s just banter about holidays being cancelled or not.

I thought the same.

FaceEatingLeopard · 03/03/2026 18:59

JennyBG · 03/03/2026 18:03

I agree with poster. The way it was said implies “bomb France next”. If it was meant as “try nearer home next time for your holiday” I think they would have worded it so.
Either way, it’s in bad taste.

Fucking hell. There's two of you out there?

I know it's gone 6pm but I'm sure there's a late night grip shop open somewhere.

Christmasinmecar · 03/03/2026 18:58

NemesisInferior · 02/03/2026 18:20

Dark humour is how people cope and process things. You might not find it funny but so what?

I have a very dark hunour most of MN would hate me irl.😀

Ballooney · 03/03/2026 18:58

I am glad retirement is on the horizon.

I am sure your team are too.

BlimeyOReillyO · 03/03/2026 18:56

pouletvous · 03/03/2026 18:55

Sp your colleague wants our closest neighbour to be bombed?

no thanks! The middle east is close enough

Don’t be silly! It was a joke….

You really think they meant it? 🙄

pouletvous · 03/03/2026 18:55

Sp your colleague wants our closest neighbour to be bombed?

no thanks! The middle east is close enough

BlimeyOReillyO · 03/03/2026 18:46

croydon15 · 03/03/2026 17:59

It's the norm now that someone will take offence at whatever is said, best not to speak to each other in case someone gets offended. You are bu

Or talk to yourself… I expect some may be offended about that!

Bluebellysmell · 03/03/2026 18:45

LaurenkI · 02/03/2026 18:10

My team has a meeting every Monday (virtual) and there’s always chat at the start about weekends etc. One of my colleagues said he’s worrying because his holiday plans for the year include already booked trips to Cyprus and Dubai. Another colleague then said ‘any chance you can book a trip to France next’ and he got a few laughs.

I have family in France, as does another colleague I’m aware of. Is it me or is this type of ‘joke’ really inappropriate given the current climate?

I would imagine that was in regard to the upcoming England v France six nations game?
France are currently leading the table over all
Or something similar maybe?

Millertime9 · 03/03/2026 18:45

Larrythemonkey · 02/03/2026 18:15

You’re an absolute fun sponge looking for offense.

sounds a good idea to book somewhere a bit closer to home!

Yep, bloody hate people now
Constantly looking to get offended or their offence validated on mumsnet
Pathetic

BlimeyOReillyO · 03/03/2026 18:45

LaurenkI · 02/03/2026 20:35

Not in my experience, I’ve always found the Dfrench to be extremely hospitable on my numerous visits over the years.

They’d not sink to such depths.

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“Such depths”

Such drama! I expect you’ll not be the only one pleased that retirement is soon!

BooBooDoodle · 03/03/2026 18:40

You are what my Nan would call, one of those 🙄 what a wet wipe you are. Get a life.

IdaGlossop · 03/03/2026 18:29

This thread is so amusing! I have returned after contributing yesterday.

Today, I am moved to comment again, with two questions. OP, why ever didn't you say something at the time eg 'Ha ha. Some of us have relatives in France. Not as funny as you think.'? Or do you prefer to remain silent, the better to nurture perceived slights, sprinkling them with the manure of self-righteousness so you can make others squirm after the event?

Steeleydan · 03/03/2026 18:28

MotherofPufflings · 02/03/2026 18:15

Can you explain why you're upset, I don't get it

I don't get it either!

Tanjamaltija · 03/03/2026 18:28

Did you meant what I think you meant? - This would have been my immediate comment. You can always ask him the next time you speak about holidays, like an afterthought - or even when you have an audience...

SteveChelt · 03/03/2026 18:26

Wow
you sound awful OP

MsDitsy · 03/03/2026 18:25

Colleagues used to ask me when I was planning on going on holiday so they booked a different week as I used to get terrible weather no matter where I went, without fail. It was funny.....the joking, not the weather.

ColadhSamh · 03/03/2026 18:22

Hope your manager has some sense today than to indulge your complaint.
Complete overreaction.

Jlom · 03/03/2026 18:21

LaurenkI · 02/03/2026 18:44

That’s for them to decide, they’ll need to acknowledge my grievance though and I expect seek guidance from HR on any next steps.

I flagged an equally inappropriate ‘joke’ by another colleague a couple of years ago and I know they were warned as to their future conduct.

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Your colleagues must love you!

LadyVioletBridgerton · 03/03/2026 18:20

You are definitely just looking for something to be offended about 🙄

Jainmain · 03/03/2026 18:19

You sound like an absolute pita to work with. Save your righteous indignation for a real offence.