To put 2yo in with older boys?

Just share with the toddler. I’m a lone parent and co-slept until DD was 4.

Your a single mum?

Id sleep in sitting room and leave dc in the cot in your room for the moment

So you buy a sofa bed for living room put the 2 boys sharing in the biggest room , baby in smallest

I think this 2 year needs to be sleeping better before I'd consider this.

You shouldn't do that to the other children, it's not fair. And instead of you being the one that disrupts him, it will be the others.

You need to tackle the night bottle first. He shouldn't be having bottles at all, it's very bad for teeth. I'd reduce the milk in the bottle more and more and after a few days offer a cup of water. He'll be angry but you need to get through it.

It’s the big gap that probably made people think that. I get that even with a 5 year gap between my two children - people assume they’re not from the same relationship as obviously no one could want a 5 year gap (we didn’t either, wanted two but closer together - not hugely fertile I guess!)

Is their Dad also living in this house? Does that contribute to the logistics re bedrooms and what can fit in your room in terms of a toddler bed etc?

It does sound grim to have five children in a cramped 4-bed, though. I hate sharing a room and hate the idea of any child having to share a room.

I wouldn’t put a 2 yo who’s up all night in with other children. That doesn’t seem sensible as he’ll keep them up.

I do follow your logic re having the much older two in their own rooms.

Can he just start the night in bed with you? Might mean less waking. Or would a toddler bed in your room be better than the cot?

Is your 13 yo in what would be the living room or do you have the scope to fmove into the living room yourself when your youngest is a bit older and you need to separate the kids out a bit?

Edit - I agree with ditching the night feeds though. The way I did it with dd (she’s now 17!) was that I gave her water rather than milk for a few nights and that sorted it. I can’t remember how old she was at this point - somewhere between 1 and 2 I think (she had been a sick baby so wasn’t appropriate to do it sooner). I know lots of people just go through a few nights of being very disturbed giving now - rocking them back to sleep or whatever - and then they stop waking up for milk.

I don't think there's any issue with three young children sharing, if they all still sleep well. Obviously you absolutely must sort out the 2yo's night waking first. Time to ditch the night feeds!

I've got two in one room, and a third on the way. The two share a room and love it, and once the third sleeps through reliably they are going in there too. There is space elsewhere in the house for their toys so it's just for sleeping. It's not a long term solution but it's fine for wee ones.

So… what was your plan when the two of you tried for a 5th? Because you don’t have a big enough home for 5 kids, and I don’t know any stable couple who had another child without planning where that child would sleep.

I'm generally not one to have a go at someone for how many children they have, but this was your decision op, so therefore i believe you being disturbed during the night is something you need to deal with yourself rather than expecting older children to.

If your room is big enough for the two year old, I suggest you keep him in with you a bit longer. Might be a bit of a contraceptive if you are thinking about number six, tbh. No one will get any sleep with the three boys sharing a room. Obvs the girl gets her own room, preferably the smallest one, just for logistics. You juggle the others in the space available. What was the plan as they grow op? It’s only going to get more difficult as they get older and need their own space. Are you still with the dad, if not can he help out?

What was your plan when you and your husband/partner started trying for a 5th?
Though, the way you talk about the 2 year old climbing in your bed instead of “our” bed makes it sound like there is no man. Where are the dads of all the kids? Can any of them go and live with a dad?

Yes she can if that’s what works. She’s the parent she can do what she likes.

An awful lot of people don't move out at 18 anymore.

Three young children can definitely share a bedroom. Whether they all sleep better is another matter altogether.

How big is your bedroom OP? Could you potentially put a temp wall up to create a little “room” for your youngest that way? What about downstairs, is there a dining room or any other space that could become another bedroom? I don’t think it would be great for anyone involved to have 3 children sharing a room especially at those ages, but equally I don’t think your daughter could or should share with younger boys and if there is no space in your oldest son’s room then that probably doesn’t work to double up either.

None of your business.

We need a house diagram with measurements and if private rent , or bought ?

Logically it seems a really daft idea to put a 2 year old you know doesn't settle into a room with two other children who will suffer at having their sleep disturbed.

I would be looking into sofa beds and making more space for the other children.

You take the small room, then put the 13 and two year old in the bigger one and get it properly divided

What makes you think your 2yr old will not be disturbed by 2 of his brothers being in a small room together?

Can you wait until daughter moves out at 18? How long away is that