Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To wonder what’s so bad about school?

116 replies

graygoose · 02/03/2026 12:31

This is from a Mollie Mae post that popped up on my feed (not a follower but she pops up) saying they were viewing schools for her daughter and she was concerned about how strict it seemed and she didn’t want school to crush her spirit. And that she’s considering home schooling. Almost all the comments agreed that they are worried school will crush their child’s spirit and are anxious about their kids starting school and advocating in favour of home schooling.

Now, we all know the algorithm creates somewhat of an echo chamber but I was surprised at the sheer number of parents who are so anti-school (not education but anti-bricks and mortar schools if that makes sense). I’m genuinely curious if this is an increasingly prevailing view? If you feel this way, could you elaborate?

My DD is a toddler so obviously not in school yet!

OP posts:
Springisnearlyspring · 02/03/2026 13:24

I’d assume they are looking at private schools where behaviour standards are high (or children are asked to leave) and they usually focus on academics especially as children may be aiming for selective schools later.
Culturally child’s dad is traveller heritage so girls especially wouldn’t be in education long. His half brother’s siblings are home ‘educated’ (Paris Fury’s children)
They obviously enjoy foreign travel and it’s easier if children not in school.
By crush spirit I’d take it to mean they don’t want child to have to follow instructions and be treated as one in 20 etc. We had a new rainbow’s mum very upset her dd had been told off (child had been very mildly told it was time to pack the colouring pencils away) apparently that was negative and mum thought she should have been able to do what wanted not fit in with the other 23 little girls - they had finished activity and it was time to tidy up and join circle. All very standard but mum wasn’t happy and child left.

usedtobeaylis · 02/03/2026 13:22

I'm not anti-school by any means but having watched my daughter go from a kid who loved school to the point she wished she could go at weekends, to a child frequently exasperated at best and yes, crushed, by the way adults treat children in schools and the inconsistent application of rules, I'm not going to criticise anyone for considering their options.

Watching your child's light dim because of school is a horrible experience. Parents are right to weigh up what is best for their child.

ToKittyornottoKitty · 02/03/2026 13:21

whoTFismadelaine · 02/03/2026 13:15

I know she is real, I am saying everything on SM is fake and likes encourage views but may not be from humans, so the only reason anything "goes viral" is because bots want it to. The more people debate rubbish on there the more it distracts from actual local issues, for example. People are like sheep and herded into seeing what other "people" have liked and assume it is good.

No, you said bots act it, write it and like it. So if it’s a bot acting and writing it… then it’s not molly mae. Which is silly, because she is an actual human who posts on social media. She is not a fake bot

Orangebadger · 02/03/2026 13:20

I totally understand her concerns as I was also worried about this. My DD is very creative and loves to explore and discover things without feeling tied it. She’s now 13, we were very lucky in that she went to a wonderful primary where she thrived and they encouraged her creativity. Big relief to me as there was no way we could home school…. Now to secondary and it’s absolutely awful for so many reasons. A lot of negativity from senior leadership team, a big focus on STEM subjects and from a more pastoral perspective, all the hard work done in primary to encourage kids to stand up for themselves and be assertive gets completely undone in secondary, you just get a detention for even suggesting no I did not do/ mean / say that…. She now hates school with a passion, reluctantly goes in where in primary she was also sad to miss a day if off sick.

Tablesandchairs23 · 02/03/2026 13:19

I wouldn't let someone of MM low intelligence levels influence my decision!!

Tablesandchairs23 · 02/03/2026 13:19

I wouldn't let someone of MM low intelligence levels influence my decision!!

whoTFismadelaine · 02/03/2026 13:18

Allswellthatendswelll · 02/03/2026 13:14

I wouldn't listen to anything from "influencers" who want engagement above all. Pushing home schooling seems to be a bit of a trend at the moment. Not bashing parents who do it for well thought out or valid reasons.

I teach primary in a really nice, holistic school and my DS is very happy in reception in a lovely , caring school. I think school is positive for the majority of children.

It's a political sub-news story being pushed for political tactics.
Not debating schools aren't working for a lot of kids, but the home schooling rise has been increasing alongside SEN needs, which is the story that gets ignored when people making money off bots and likes decide to jump on the bandwagon.

Luckyingame · 02/03/2026 13:18

Fivelegged · 02/03/2026 12:38

As what I've seen of M-M suggests unusually low intelligence, and the child's father gets hit in the head for a living, it seems to me that these people should not be home educating.

😂👍

Allswellthatendswelll · 02/03/2026 13:18

Fearlesssloth · 02/03/2026 13:11

I feel conflicted. As a parent of a similar age dd, I get the feeling of not wanting to crush your child’s spirit but it’s also naive. They’re so full of wonder at that age and it’d be nice for them to have a life where they can run wild in the forest all day, build dens, and create art with trees or whatever, but it doesn’t exactly prepare them for the real world. Classroom learning isn’t for every child and I wish school could be more of a balance between some kind of forest school & classroom learning. Most of us don’t have that option though. Mollie Mae is minted though so if she feels like that she probably shouldn’t be looking at ‘normal’ schools

Reception is very play based and lots of schools have forest schools. Not exactly the same I know!

However most parents couldn't offer that kind of experience for their kids day in and day out so it's irresponsible imo when influencers push homeschooling.

Iocanepowder · 02/03/2026 13:16

DC1 is in reception and loves it. Runs in each day and comes out happy.

When the time comes for secondary school i’ll be fully researching their anti-bullying policies.

whoTFismadelaine · 02/03/2026 13:15

Calypsocuckoo · 02/03/2026 13:02

She looked quite real to me when I saw her and her family eating brunch a few days ago 😂

I know she is real, I am saying everything on SM is fake and likes encourage views but may not be from humans, so the only reason anything "goes viral" is because bots want it to. The more people debate rubbish on there the more it distracts from actual local issues, for example. People are like sheep and herded into seeing what other "people" have liked and assume it is good.

Allswellthatendswelll · 02/03/2026 13:14

I wouldn't listen to anything from "influencers" who want engagement above all. Pushing home schooling seems to be a bit of a trend at the moment. Not bashing parents who do it for well thought out or valid reasons.

I teach primary in a really nice, holistic school and my DS is very happy in reception in a lovely , caring school. I think school is positive for the majority of children.

ToKittyornottoKitty · 02/03/2026 13:12

Tabitha005 · 02/03/2026 13:09

Depends on how you define 'success', but getting rich off the back of the labour of vulnerable workers isn't a good look, whichever way you slice it.

She clearly did fuck all due diligence because she either didn't know she should have or was wilfully ignorant.

Doesn’t relate to the school system really, or suggest she has a low IQ generally. Maybe that discussion belongs on its own thread.

Fearlesssloth · 02/03/2026 13:11

I feel conflicted. As a parent of a similar age dd, I get the feeling of not wanting to crush your child’s spirit but it’s also naive. They’re so full of wonder at that age and it’d be nice for them to have a life where they can run wild in the forest all day, build dens, and create art with trees or whatever, but it doesn’t exactly prepare them for the real world. Classroom learning isn’t for every child and I wish school could be more of a balance between some kind of forest school & classroom learning. Most of us don’t have that option though. Mollie Mae is minted though so if she feels like that she probably shouldn’t be looking at ‘normal’ schools

Happyjoe · 02/03/2026 13:11

Academies are pretty bad around here and yeah, they can ruin the whole education experience completely.

StrippeyFrog · 02/03/2026 13:10

Most schools are underfunded and have children with behavioural problems. I’m not surprised people are anxious about sending their kids to them. My own DC is a completely different person since starting school and reverts back to his happy self during the holidays. If I could afford to I probably would look at alternatives.

Tabitha005 · 02/03/2026 13:09

ToKittyornottoKitty · 02/03/2026 13:07

That doesn’t make her an unsuccessful business woman…

Depends on how you define 'success', but getting rich off the back of the labour of vulnerable workers isn't a good look, whichever way you slice it.

She clearly did fuck all due diligence because she either didn't know she should have or was wilfully ignorant.

ToKittyornottoKitty · 02/03/2026 13:07

Tabitha005 · 02/03/2026 13:05

Isn't she the one who got paid a ton of cash by Pretty Little Thing or some similar crap brand then acted all surprised when it turned out the clothes were produced in sweatshops paying their workers fuck all and not giving a toss about their safety or wellbeing?

That doesn't say 'successful businesswoman' - that screams 'idiot'.

That doesn’t make her an unsuccessful business woman…

Tabitha005 · 02/03/2026 13:05

ToKittyornottoKitty · 02/03/2026 12:42

She’s a successful business woman. Not sure why people see ‘social media’ and a pretty face and assume a woman must be stupid.

Isn't she the one who got paid a ton of cash by Pretty Little Thing or some similar crap brand then acted all surprised when it turned out the clothes were produced in sweatshops paying their workers fuck all and not giving a toss about their safety or wellbeing?

That doesn't say 'successful businesswoman' - that screams 'idiot'.

Calypsocuckoo · 02/03/2026 13:02

whoTFismadelaine · 02/03/2026 12:46

Anything you watch on social media is a load of bollocks these days. Bots write it, act it using AI, bots follow it, like it and propogate it to other bots to add likes. Nothing on there is liked by actual real humans without being pushed to the fore by bots and algorithms. Politics pushes a lot of these so just don't engage.

She looked quite real to me when I saw her and her family eating brunch a few days ago 😂

bohnerific69 · 02/03/2026 13:00

My son is in year 2 now and happily goes into school, sometimes things happen as they’re still kids but we deal with it and move on. His start to school was full of nerves and anxiety, so many mornings of tears and the teacher pulling him off me. He’s a shy kid who isn’t very confident in new situations or surroundings so it was always going to be like that tbh. He was 18 months when we went into the first lockdown so his development was impacted massively. But a mix of not giving up, gentle encouragement and an amazing teacher and he’s come on so much. It’s been incredible to watch tbh.

I think it’s just important to find the right school to fit your child. For example, a big school would be hell for my son. He goes to a small village school, the intake each year is 13. It’s perfect for him.

All that to say, it’s probably just clickbait for MM. I bet her kid goes to mainstream school and she loves it.

Screamingabdabz · 02/03/2026 13:00

People who have cosseted and indulged their pfb can’t stand the thought that they might be treated like just another child in a scrum of 30 (or however many are in the private school classes she’s looking at).

Children need boundaries in order to know how to live, learn, behave, and live in community with others. Parents who actively avoid that for their children are doing a big disservice to the child and society.

CasperGutman · 02/03/2026 12:58

My children both love school. 🤷

ToKittyornottoKitty · 02/03/2026 12:58

Fivelegged · 02/03/2026 12:56

I have not mentioned her appearance, which I know only from an ad for laundry detergent, so I'm not sure why you're labouring under this delusion. She's a classic dimwit influencer raising children with a man who gets punched for a living. I don't think either of them would be able to successfully home educate a child. Her appearance is totally irrelevant, as is his.

Of course, totally believable. It’s irrelevant anyway, according to @whoTFismadelaineshes a fake AI bot anyway. Who knew the AI could be so thick

Fivelegged · 02/03/2026 12:56

ToKittyornottoKitty · 02/03/2026 12:51

There’s just no point entering into sensible discussion with people like you. You’ve no idea of her IQ, and she’s clearly a successful business woman. But she’s pretty so you’re assuming she’s thick, despite the evidence. Hopefully you’re a man, I hate this women hating women crap.

I have not mentioned her appearance, which I know only from an ad for laundry detergent, so I'm not sure why you're labouring under this delusion. She's a classic dimwit influencer raising children with a man who gets punched for a living. I don't think either of them would be able to successfully home educate a child. Her appearance is totally irrelevant, as is his.