To tell my manager I won’t share a room with colleague again?

Do not under any circumstances state to your employer that your colleague is responsible for snoring. You will lose all credibility. my dd with a bmi of 17 snores. It has nothing to do with her weight. So not talk about weight or you will come out sounding like a bigot.

asking you to share a room is inappropriate. It has always been inappropriate. That you and one colleague managed to get along was a fluke. Your new colleague is not obliged to bend to your preferences. She deserves to relax in her hotel room just as much as you. You both should have your own space.

I would refuse to share with her.

Unless you work for the same company, that’s irrelevant here. They were questioning the policy within OP’s company to check that ware wasn’t any discrimination going on (I recall a post a while pack where the poster was saying she and the only other woman in the business were expected to share, but all the men got their own single rooms, so it does happen).

The OP has already answered to confirm the men do share unless very senior.

That's true actually yes.

More like @Fishrepeating's post of 20:58 - depersonalise it.

How about

Dear Manager/HR

I am writing to tell you that I will not be sharing a hotel room with any colleague again when travelling for work. Although I have occasionally been able to in the past I have come to realise that this policy is a deeply inappropriate invasion of privacy which puts colleagues into awkward situations of knowing/having to reveal private information that should not be open knowledge between colleagues. All of us are entitled to privacy and self-respect and this should not be sacrificed for saving the company the cost of a hotel room.

I wouldn't name the colleague or give the reason as any one particular person. To just say that you don't want to share or don't think it's appropriate should be enough.

I worked for a charity and I did snore badly and ws made to share a room always. I was really embarrassed about it becasue there wasnt a lot I could do and I knew it kept others awake. I was so embarrassed. I see now it was wrong for us to always be made to share a room.

I remember one time someone saying they wouldnt share and me thinking they were being a real diva! I was seriously wrong and now thought how little I respected myself.

Yanbu.

I know I snore and I wouldn't dream of sharing a hotel room with anyone other than DH who is used to it. It would be horrendously selfish. Quite simply you are entitled to sufficient self-respect that you can and must insist this never happens again.

Dear Manager/HR

I am writing to tell you that I will not be sharing a hotel room with (colleague name) again. It is deeply inappropriate that company policy has put me in this awkward position because telling you why would require me to tell you personal information about (colleague) that it is private to her and so it's not appropriate for me to give further details. I am not complaining about her and none of this affects either of our capacity to do our jobs to an excellent standard which we will both continue to do. However in future all accommodation must be arranged with separate rooms.

Yours sincerely

I’ve been away with work and shared many hotel rooms with a same sex colleague…

I lost five stone and stopped snoring

In my 25+ years of travelling for work, I have never heard of anyone being expected to share a room with a colleague. Completely unheard of and 100% inappropriate.

Forget all the reasons you don’t want to share with this new colleague. Just tell your employer you are not willing to share a room with a colleague, full stop.

Have this well documented and if you are put at risk of redundancy following this stance then I think you’d have quite a strong case.

I was with you until this catty comment - now I think maybe you have the room mate you deserve. I guess she’s not over the moon at having to share either

I was thinking the same thing.

This. Home and social life is one thing. But work is another. Nobody should be obliged to reveal personal things to a work colleague.

I would never share a room with a work colleague.

We have a small business (proper small 5-8 employees depending on the time of year). Dh takes them away for a night usually a couple times a year. Everyone gets their own room and all food and drinks paid for. There’s no limit. I mean, they can’t buy a round for the whole pub, but I’d say it’s at least £150 per person per day, every meal paid, all drinks and taxis if they go anywhere where they need them.

No excuse for a medium to large business making anyone share a room.

You don't know that. Plenty of posters have said that they know people who snore who are smaller than that. DP snores and he weighs 9st 6lb wringing wet, as do plenty of children. It's common for people to blame weight when it's nothing to do with it.

Anyway, going by her snarky comments later on in the thread about her, it's clear that it's made up intended to steer opinion over to how awful the woman is and nothing to do with it being more normal for companies to pay for single rooms rather than twins these days. After all, what does weight or food have to do with going to the bathroom or talking to a spouse?

This 100%. The unreasonable party in this scenario is the employer. It is totally unacceptable to expect an employee to stay away from home in the course of their work without providing them with an adequate room that affords privacy.

I cannot believe this is sanctioned by HR. Is this in the UK?

Why isn’t it legal? What hard facts have you got to back that up?

I'm not sure its even legal. No way would I share with a colleague, hell no!

i used to travel a lot for work. No WAY would I share with a colleague. Never.

Why should she have to

What a disgusting thought. Yeah let’s fat shame someone cause they snore… As you mentioned she snores like a man, many women are the same so you are also being sexist.
suck it up buttercup.

She's not actually that nice if you read her replies. I've gone right off her. Wish I hadn't spent 5 minutes trying to help her.

Wrong thread

OP personifies the reason that sharing a room is unacceptable … it’s a complete divulgence of your personal life. Who wants their colleague and all and sundry they gossip with, to know they take meds, have a colostomy bag, are doing IVF, wear period pants, snore, dribble, have night terrors, ibs, chronic constipation, have killer
farts and talk in their sleep? In a profit making company, that does not pay on the basis of a 24 hour day, no employee should have to reveal any of the above to justify not sharing a room nor adapt their behaviour in their down time to protect their privacy. As a pp said, in an emergency situation you can get by but on a regular working trip, no way. And as another pp said, it is worse than a dorm situation as the presence of others, even a communal bathroom rather than en-suite, dilutes the situation down.

Steel! A boy.