To tell my manager I won’t share a room with colleague again?

I didn't share a room with my oldest friend when we went away last year, no way would I share with someone I barely knew!!

Yes you should refuse to share with her. It is unreasonable for your employer to expect yih to share anyway.

I can’t believe you ever agreed to share TBH. It is not appropriate for work colleagues to share a private space. What if your new colleague had been male instead of female? Would they still have expected you to share?

Totally inappropriate for work to ask you to share a room with a colleague. Not sure what your colleagues weight has to do with anything though.

Do your managers share rooms too? And the directors? Your time off while travelling is as good as theirs. You are entitled to some privacy and rest.

Common cause, sure. Absolutely the reason for everyone? No.

Make all the assumptions you want but stating them as fact is idiotic.

Well I'm going to comment as being overweight is a common cause of snoring and apnea as advised by my consultant. You do know you don't have to comment to tell me not to comment as you dont know that its not the cause either? We all make assumptions and guesses whenever we respond to a post, including you!

This! 👏👏

Depending on the hotel, there may not have been much in the way of a common space to eat in after the restaurant closed, and it’s not really great to be wandering the corridors with your dinner tray trying to find an armchair to perch on.

We are in violent agreement about solving the problem by having separate rooms though 😀

Well….yes. I wouldn’t share a room with a colleague.

It's not unreasonable to do pretty much whatever you like in a hotel room you have to yourself, But given she's sharing with a person for whom it was a disturbance, she should probably have eaten in one of the hotel's common spaces.

Of course this is another reason why a company expecting people to share is not appropriate. It's not just OP whose boundaries and comfort was walked all over.

fuck sharing a room. You want me to travel, you pay for a room for me, not a share a room.

precisely.

Her company expects her to spend an evening plus overnight away from home, with no extra pay or even just time off in lieu - AND spend this unpaid overtime sharing with a STRANGER whose habits make her feel very uncomfortable.

No way. Just NO!!

The flip side of that is that it isn't inherently unreasonable to eat room service in your room, especially after the restaurant has closed.

Yes, in this case, it was the second dinner for the colleague, but what if she'd been out for a walk or working late in the office or talking to her kids before bed and 9pm was the best time for her to eat.

No one needs to eat two evening meals, and not in the room where a collegue is sleeping.

But largely, fuck sharing a room. You want me to travel, you pay for a room for me, not a share a room. Or I don't go. No, we're adult, it's work. There are limits.

Snoring is correlated with weight.

Weight is not the only cause of snoring.

Do people really not understand this?

Perfect! She absolutely doesn't need a reason.

the whole snoring issue is absolutely irrelevant. You do not need a reason @Worktripissue to not want to share at all because you are entitled to a private life.

All you need to say is

on reflection, I feel extremely uncomfortable sharing a bedroom and sleeping in the same room as any colleague. A bedroom is a private space. The process of going to bed including getting undressed and sleeping is a private activity and it is unreasonable to expect virtual strangers only connnected by their employment to give up their privacy in this way. I am sorry but I cannot do this and am not prepared to share a bedroom overnight. I am happy to travel for work but not at the expense of my own privacy.

The Op has clearly said "In her own words she knows she needs to shift some weight, but she chooses not to."

That's not fat shaming.

I am fat, if I was not fat, then I wouldn't snore (and I know this). But I am fat, so I do. Someone using that as a reason for not sharing a room with me is not fat shaming, it's repeating what I have said.

The poor colleague. Her weight and snoring getting discussed with management! Absolutely awful infringement of privacy by this employer.

It's company policy which both colleagues agreed to so they either have to make it work or negotiate an alternative.

But she’d had her own room before that

Absolutely YANBU and I'd be really shocked to be asked. I expect to have privacy when I'm sleeping. The only people I would share a room with are my husband and my daughter and even they annoy me quite often.

There is absolutely no way you should have to share a room with a colleague. You need your own privacy. Definitely tell them either you have your own room or you don’t go at all. If it’s a financial issue then perhaps suggest only one of you attend.

I’d nip in bud now and email to day snoring meant you couldn’t function to full capacity and concerned h & s implications re driving tired.
I do think expecting you to share with a stranger is leaving company exposed to all sorts of risks.

If you go in with 12 reasons people will argue you on the weakest point. Better to just stick to one strong point. Given that she did accept it in the first place, this seems to be the strongest.