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AIBU?

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Original poster

To stay in bed when DP gets up with his child?

216 replies

probablynoted · 28/02/2026 19:54

DP and I have lived together for 2 years, he has a son aged 5. There is constant tension because I don’t wake up on the weekends he’s here when he gets up (around 6am).

He is with us Monday, Friday, Saturday and Sunday every week.

DP has made comments saying “I’ve been lonely” when I’ve woken up around 8:30/9 and joined them in the living room. Weekdays I usually am up anyway because of work.

DP has said that going forward he wants us to be a “family” which involves me waking up and having breakfast together. He also expects me to look after his son if he’s going on a night out. For example, he’s told me next Saturday he’s out with friends. I’ve said I’m not able to look after his son, so he’s asked his mum (DPs mum).

Hes said that if we have a baby he’ll enjoy all the lie ins in getting.

aibu to not wake up with him and his little boy?

OP posts:
CaffeinatedMum · 28/02/2026 22:37

Why are you posting this again?! People’s advice hasn’t changed.

90sTrifle · 28/02/2026 22:34

probablynoted · 28/02/2026 19:54

DP and I have lived together for 2 years, he has a son aged 5. There is constant tension because I don’t wake up on the weekends he’s here when he gets up (around 6am).

He is with us Monday, Friday, Saturday and Sunday every week.

DP has made comments saying “I’ve been lonely” when I’ve woken up around 8:30/9 and joined them in the living room. Weekdays I usually am up anyway because of work.

DP has said that going forward he wants us to be a “family” which involves me waking up and having breakfast together. He also expects me to look after his son if he’s going on a night out. For example, he’s told me next Saturday he’s out with friends. I’ve said I’m not able to look after his son, so he’s asked his mum (DPs mum).

Hes said that if we have a baby he’ll enjoy all the lie ins in getting.

aibu to not wake up with him and his little boy?

It’s hard enough getting up at 6am for your own child (as your DP is demonstrating) let alone someone else’s.

Don’t have a child with this man. He’ll take revenge and leave you to all the early mornings with new baby plus as you’re up, you may as well look after his child too.

Daytimetellyqueen · 28/02/2026 22:33

ChristmasChroniclesBookFairie · 28/02/2026 19:56

I think it would be a massive mistake to have a baby with this man.

This! Fuck me Op, run for the hills!

Renenma · 28/02/2026 22:33

probablynoted · 28/02/2026 19:54

DP and I have lived together for 2 years, he has a son aged 5. There is constant tension because I don’t wake up on the weekends he’s here when he gets up (around 6am).

He is with us Monday, Friday, Saturday and Sunday every week.

DP has made comments saying “I’ve been lonely” when I’ve woken up around 8:30/9 and joined them in the living room. Weekdays I usually am up anyway because of work.

DP has said that going forward he wants us to be a “family” which involves me waking up and having breakfast together. He also expects me to look after his son if he’s going on a night out. For example, he’s told me next Saturday he’s out with friends. I’ve said I’m not able to look after his son, so he’s asked his mum (DPs mum).

Hes said that if we have a baby he’ll enjoy all the lie ins in getting.

aibu to not wake up with him and his little boy?

The lie in comment…ew!

Run before you have a child together.
I don’t understand why people do this to themselves

MovedlikeHarlowinMonteCarlo · 28/02/2026 22:31

Why is he lonely when he's with his son?

Pyjamatimenow · 28/02/2026 22:30

Run

JanBlues2026 · 28/02/2026 22:29

I’m sure your last thread said you were expecting, if you’re not then get out while you can or there will be no lie ins or much sleep for you for the next few years

DesertRome5 · 28/02/2026 22:06

You need to wear a tshirt that says "nanny and prostitute free of charge".

YABU for considering staying with him anyway longer.

Shinyandnew1 · 28/02/2026 22:05

I’m sure I’ve read your posts before. He’s a dickhead-you’d be better on your own.

99bottlesofkombucha · 28/02/2026 22:03

Another one here to shout do not have a baby with this man.
I bet my house and eldest child he didn’t do nigh wakings and half the early mornings when his baby was born, that was his partners job and now he thinks it sucks that his new partner (you) doesn’t know her place.

Gentlydoesit2 · 28/02/2026 21:57

Relationship is doomed if this is what you're both like 2 years in. Do not procreate

genesis92 · 28/02/2026 21:54

Why does he has him every weekend? Why doesn’t the mum ever have him?

ChrisMartinsKisskam · 28/02/2026 21:49

The only person who is being unreasonable is you if you stay

you got lots of good advice a few weeks ago
When you asked exactly the same question

Jlom · 28/02/2026 21:26

It sounds like he went for 50:50 to avoid paying maintenance and then to avoid actually looking after the kid, he had to find someone to do the childcare for free.

A friend of mine dumped her awful ex because it dawned on her that she was sat at home on Saturday nights looking after his child, whilst both parents were out partying with their friends. He managed to get someone else pregnant on one of those nights out, so that women is probably looking after both his children now.

Sleepingwiththelightson · 28/02/2026 21:25

Cheeky git. Like others have said, he’s the parent. He needs to do the parenting. Yeah have some ‘family time’. Defo no babysitting, if he’s going out, he needs to organise appropriate child care. The child is not yours= not your problem.

CheeseWisely · 28/02/2026 21:16

Fuck that. Our DS is both of ours and still only one of us gets up with him at a time on a weekend. Plenty of time to ‘be a family’ later in the day.

Blondeshavemorefun · 28/02/2026 21:13

everypageisempty · 28/02/2026 21:08

And absolutely this

Show quote history

Tho to be fair that’s only a tue wed Thur and prob up early for work so no real lie in

LoughNaFoo · 28/02/2026 21:11

I wonder what caused the breakdown of his first family?

MrsLizzieDarcy · 28/02/2026 21:10

Well if you're happy being his doormat, crack on. What he's pushing for is to stay in bed himself, while you're there doing childcare and waiting on him.

Fuck that for a game of soldiers.

SalmonOnFinnCrisp · 28/02/2026 21:10

Yabu to sleep walk into a future with this man..

Read what you wrote...
DP has said that going forward he wants us to be a “family” which involves me waking up and having breakfast together. He also expects me to look after his son if he’s going on a night out. For example, he’s told me next Saturday he’s out with friends. I’ve said I’m not able to look after his son, so he’s asked his mum (DPs mum).

Hes said that if we have a baby he’ll enjoy all the lie ins in getting.

I hope you are on decent contraception.
You'd be an absolute idiot (sorry but its true) to have a child with him

I'd be reviewing the entire relationship and looking to end it.
He doesnt sound like a good person

Blondeshavemorefun · 28/02/2026 21:10

Why do you have the boy every weekend

its his child. Saying the one breakfast every other weekend so 1/4 lie ins might be nice

equally he’s 5. He’s quite old enough to stay in own room and play quietly /read a book till 7am

6 is early !

but def don’t have a child with this man

WiddlinDiddlin · 28/02/2026 21:09

I've voted YABU, because you've posted about this before, the man is a massive twat, you know he is a petty, vindictive little man baby and you're still with him and still considering having a child with him.

everypageisempty · 28/02/2026 21:08

ThiagoJones · 28/02/2026 20:51

Still doesn’t mean she should get up with the child at 6am.
Her partner has 50:50 custody of his child. That means the child’s mother gets up with him at 6am 50% of the time, and the child’s father gets up with him at 6am 50% of the time. There is absolutely no need for the OP to take over any of the early mornings. Her partner gets his lie ins on the 50% of mornings that the child is with his mother.
I’d have absolutely no respect for a man who couldn’t cope with getting up with his own child for half the week, and a man who said he was ‘lonely’ spending time with his own son for a couple of hours, 3/4 mornings a week wouldn’t be the sort of man I’d reproduce with.

Edited
Show quote history

And absolutely this

everypageisempty · 28/02/2026 21:07

Hes said that if we have a baby he’ll enjoy all the lie ins in getting.

Do not have a baby with this man. He's playing tit for tat likening a shared baby that you are both the parents of with his 5 year old who isn't your child or responsibility.

Bananalanacake · 28/02/2026 20:58

How long were you together when you moved in. What would have happened if you told him you want a relationship but you don't want to live together until his son is 16, bet he'd have dropped you like a hot potato and been out there looking for a live in nanny pretty quick.

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