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AIBU?

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AIBU for complaining

56 replies

FazbearEntertainment · 27/02/2026 09:11

I was admitted to hospital on Sunday (22nd) with severe pains (I am 6 wks pregnant so the concern from staff was miscarriage)

I disclosed to staff I will not be keeping pregnancy due to MH issues and already having a SEND child who takes all my care and attention. Staff was fabulous EXCEPT for ONE...

I was sent for an MRI due to a brain tumour I have possibly growing due to the pregnancy hormones and was greeted by a doctor. She then refused to do the MRI and says to me verbatim...

"how could you when your baby is breathing and has feelings and can hear everything we are discussing right now " "I could lose my license due to women like you who don't have good reason to have an MRI" "Your BABY may come out disfigured" "I am not comfortable committing murder on a baby because of you"

My husband who was with me and myself were absolutely gobsmacked by this. It's no easy decision for us, we just cannot cope with another. No further explanation, we just don't want to do it because our son comes first.

WIBU to complain or do I just accept that this is what I deserve for my decision to terminate?

OP posts:
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MrsBenevolent · 28/02/2026 17:31

OP, ignore Reddit, it's mostly American anyway. I wouldn't give it the time of day. They also can't spell.

Glad they are escalating this. You can also independently contact her registration body 🌺

FazbearEntertainment · 28/02/2026 15:07

So another update- spoke to PALS who have also sent it to a higher board of complaints so hopefully something will be done and no woman has to have to go through their choice being scrutinised again.

I also posted this on Reddit and had A LOT of backlash from Prochoice person. I've attached one particularl message that I had from someone.

Its crazy in this time of age that women still can't chose what they want without others scrutiny

AIBU for complaining
OP posts:
Sartre · 27/02/2026 18:02

If she thinks a 6 week embryo has feelings and can hear, she needs to retake her medical exams.

Newyearawaits · 27/02/2026 17:33

Yes OP, you need to complain.
I am very sorry for what you are going through.
You absolutely should not have been on the receiving end of such biased, prejudiced comments.
This is totally unacceptable and unprofessional and is unacceptable.
Please take care of yourself OP

BlueMum16 · 27/02/2026 17:22

I'm sorry you've had to go through this and well done on complaining.

Hopefully this will prevent someone else being in similar circumstances when at their most vulnerable.

Take care

MrsBenevolent · 27/02/2026 16:58

Good luck OP and best wishes going forward 🙏

FazbearEntertainment · 27/02/2026 16:38

Thanks everyone for the comments and kind words from so many. I've submitted a complaint and will update when I've received a reply ☺️💓

OP posts:
Tacohill · 27/02/2026 14:08

The hospital will know the person who did your scan.
Report it to the relevant people and say the date and time and as much description as possible.

MrsBenevolent · 27/02/2026 13:43

Also OP, your description of the uniform makes me think it likely that this woman was an AHP, which would include radiographers. But I'm in a different part of the UK.

The governing body is the HCPC.

MrsBenevolent · 27/02/2026 13:40

OP I am so sorry you went through this. Out sounds so distressing at a time that you really don't need it.

Just for clarity for a PP, Dr's cannot "order" MRIs or indeed X rays. They request them. The radiographer can decline if they feel it to be inappropriate or unsafe. Same way a nurse can decline to administer an inappropriate medication or procedure.

Radiographers are not "technicians ", they are highly trained and registered professionals. A radiologist is a specialist Dr.

Again OP, I'm so sorry 😥

FazbearEntertainment · 27/02/2026 13:24

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

And why do I need to include EVERYTHING? I had told my nurses, the doctor AND a psychiatrist of my choice to not continue with pregnancy. I shouldn't of had to tell another person, that should be on my files.

Are you saying that I should've gone around the hospital with a big cardboard "I want an abortion" sign around my neck so I could be judged further?

I asked a question of, was she out of line for saying that AFTER I disclosed the information to her and should complain. I did not feel the need to disclose my life story and what I ate for breakfast which was nothing because I CANNOT KEEP FOOD DOWN IF THAT'S THE EXTRA BIT OF UNNECESSARY INFORMATION YOU NEED.

YES, SHE KNEW OF MY CHOICR. NO I DO NOT KNOW FOR CERTAIN HER POSITION OTHER THAN SHE WAS A "HIGHER UP" AND YES I'VE CONTACTED MULTIPLE CLINICS TO GET AN ABORTION.

I do not know why she stated these things other than she is potentially PROLIFE and that is HER opinion but it felt uncomfortable and totally uncalled for in the setting.

anything else? Want to know what time I took a crap last?

OP posts:
CanSeeClearlyNowTheRainHasGone · 27/02/2026 12:57

This reply has been deleted

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FazbearEntertainment · 27/02/2026 12:14

MunicipalDarwinism · 27/02/2026 11:52

If you have a look on the hospital website, it might tell you who wears which scrubs.

I have tried to look but unfortunately can't find anything regarding the hospital I attended

OP posts:
MunicipalDarwinism · 27/02/2026 11:52

FazbearEntertainment · 27/02/2026 11:43

She wore red wine coloured scrubs whilst the others wore green x

If you have a look on the hospital website, it might tell you who wears which scrubs.

FazbearEntertainment · 27/02/2026 11:43

MunicipalDarwinism · 27/02/2026 11:27

I'm not 1000% sure she was a doctor but was dressed differently to the others

What do you mean @FazbearEntertainment ? What was she wearing that was different to the others?

She wore red wine coloured scrubs whilst the others wore green x

OP posts:
youalright · 27/02/2026 11:39

FazbearEntertainment · 27/02/2026 11:07

You must have such a fulfilling life to find the situation funny

Im laughing at the comment a previous poster wrote not you

AdoraBell · 27/02/2026 11:38

I would definitely complain and demand a written explanation how the foetus is breathing while secured inside a uterus?

BauhausOfEliott · 27/02/2026 11:34

Yes, you absolutely should complain about this.

ForNavyOP · 27/02/2026 11:34

Unbelievable. Yes, complain.

pinkyredrose · 27/02/2026 11:32

Definitely complain, that's outrageous!

MunicipalDarwinism · 27/02/2026 11:27

I'm not 1000% sure she was a doctor but was dressed differently to the others

What do you mean @FazbearEntertainment ? What was she wearing that was different to the others?

Stressedoutmummyof3 · 27/02/2026 11:25

Absolutely disgusting and I would 100% complain. No-one has the right to speak to you like that. I'm impressed you or your husband didn't say something at the time but I assume you were too stunned.
You know you're doing the right thing for your family so don't worry about that but do complain. I bet you're not the first person she's spoken like that to.

365RubyRed · 27/02/2026 11:19

I'm not sure a doctor would say anything so judgemental. You must find out what role this woman holds, and complain to her relevant governing body, as well as to the hospital management team as well.

FazbearEntertainment · 27/02/2026 11:07

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

You must have such a fulfilling life to find the situation funny

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beAsensible1 · 27/02/2026 11:06

id be contacting the gmc and whoever else. I’d be going to get them struck off absolutely disgusting and outrageous behaviour. If they couldn’t do it then they should’ve removed themself and handed it off to someone else.

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