MIL planning her own party and didn’t invite me!

@MynameisJune if your daughters have DC would you expect them to have Mother’s Day without their DC so they can spend it with you

When one’s kids are small tbe option to spend Mother’s Day without them can be more appealing 😂

I can understand why that would be a lovely treat for your MIL and it wouldn’t bother me in the slightest. Can you do something as a family for Mother’s Day on the Saturday instead? That way everyone gets a nice Mother’s Day.

I've heard of it quite a lot

Bear in mind, how often do they just have their kids together?

I would never put my son in the position that his wife is made to feel unwelcome by his family.

OPs mum is dead so MIL knows OP won't be spending the day with anyone.

Perhaps she feels that her DC don’t treat her on Mother’s Day or make her feel special. She’s thought right you buggers I’ll sort it myself then and you’re coming!
it’s quite amusing actually. I’d humour her. It’s a couple of hours in one day. Maybe her DC and your DH will sort something out for her next year in advance to take back the control!

It’s weird af. And a great way to make ur d/s in law not give 2fks about u for any other time. I would refuse to see her any other times she wants like Xmas or birthdays etc, ur too busy with ur OWN child to see her.

I hate comments like this, it's just cruel. It's like you're making out someone's a shit parent becuase they'd rather not have to solo parent. I'm sure, like most mums, OP spends a great amount of time alone with her kids, yes kids she loves, kids than whine and nag, ask for
things constantly and bicker.

A mother isn't wrong, or lazy, or unloving or a shit mum for wanting one day in a year where the children's other parent takes on the drudgery and makes her feel appreciated.

Women aren't childish or selfish for wanting abit of love and appreciation once in a while.

If its just a day in the calender and no big deal then MIL can arrange to see her children any other time.

If one of your kids is a boy, some day in the future you might just want a Mother’s Day with just your kids. And if your son says no how would you feel? Honestly?

I hope I can still spend some time, on some Mother’s Day with just my two girls. Kids and partners Chang dynamics and don’t always make for easy conversations.

I would have absolutely no issue with my DH doing this. But then I don’t really put any relevance on Mother’s Day.

Well to be fair, she's probably assuming that her children's five spouses might need to see their own mothers on Mother's Day. She's trying to anticipate that and the risk that she'll not see any of her own children because they've all been commandeered to visit their MILs instead, so she's getting her invitations in early. It's quite a good plan when you think about it. By only inviting her own children and not their spouses she can't be accused of trying to keep them from their own mothers, which is what would probably have happened if she'd invited you as well.

She should have asked first and arranged it for a different day.

That’s extra selfish in light of your Mothers passing. Is she always this ridiculous?

She is his mother. If he would like to spend this time with her, he should do that.

When your children are old enough to understand the point of the day (presumung they aren't already), they can thank you for being their mother in a similar way.

All the angst around this day is ridiculous.

Wow thats self absorbed. I can only imagine how upset I'd have been if my grandmothers didn't want to see me on Mother's Day when I was a kid.

Does she have daughters who also have their own kids (and by attending wouldn't spend the day with those kids)?

1. Are the grandkids invited?
2. Does she have all sons?
3. If no and no, is she expecting her daughters to not spend mother's day with their own children?

It's not going to take up the whole day. He's just having tea and cake whilst he visits. Or are you expecting him not to visit his mum on mothers day?

If it's only a day in the calendar and doesn't matter, why doesn't the MIL have her tea party the next Sunday? Or any other day of the year?

@Snowyowl99 if DS has DC with a partner I would be okay if he wanted to spend time with them rather than me

With 5 DSs, add 5 partners, then kids, it’s not just an afternoon tea, it becomes a small party!

I’m really glad your husband has said no, great that he’s got your back. I think this is a wild suggestion from her when you have kids, and presumably some of your brothers siblings do too. I get she wants Mother’s Day to be all about her, but she has to remember there are other mothers in the family and her needs/wants don’t trump yours!

Yes, he should at least spend part of day with her. OP maybe your children will be like him and not see you on mothers day when they are adults.

Awwwww bless

tjat was her wishes, don’t like it? Ah well

And you want it to be "your day" only, so what's so crazy about this?

"Tea" isn't "all day" either.