Anti social behavior or boys being boys

Boys will be boys is a bullshit saying.

Boys should be held accountable for their behaviour and not have it overlooked or downplayed because of their gender.

This is exactly the kind of attitude that lets boys and men think they’re entitled to act and think a certain way and that they’re superior to women.

Boys will be boys is an excuse used to minimise poor behaviour.
Your son was trespassing and knew it. They could have caused damage and then who would pay? They could have been injured and that’s when parents start to complain or even try to sue for injuries their little darlings have sustained that are basically their own fault.
Take it seriously or next time who knows where he’ll trespass - into someone’s house perhaps…?

If they were booting a football up and down the middle of a pedestrian shopping precinct, I would class that as antisocial. Calling playing football on a football pitch antisocial behaviour is a stretch to say the very least.

I personally believe that it should be illegal to lock up sports facilities but that's another argument!

Ive obviously told my son not to do this again but I think young lads this age are probably always pulling stunts like this and to class it as anti social behavior is a bit much.

OP. You are part of the problem. Pack in "boys will be boys" grow up and teach your sons how to be productive and useful members of society.

Must be a slow time for the police in your area!

As a one off, technically it's not ASB unless they have caused damage or a nuisance but I expect the police feel it's worth intervening early. If nothing is done, word gets around that the football pitch is a free for all? Then what?

I think the attitude that stuff like this doesn't matter is part of the problem. Do we only ever wait until it is a problem and damage is done?

Why don't you read the thread and find out?

@Thechaseison71 it's anti social if they are not meant to be on it and causing a nuisance

They found somewhere to play football and told not to. They did it once. How is this antisocial behaviour? Did they break anything? I got up to much worse as a kid but no one got hurt. Unless they did anything else, or multiple times, they're just behaving as normal kids pushing boundaries. This is over reaction. Of course they should get a telling off.

What's antisocial about playing football on a pitch though?

That's probably why the police are treating it as anti social behaviour.

Wtf? - “Perhaps the people who don't think so haven't had much male input in their lives.”

This isn’t a ‘boys will be boys issue’ it’s a ‘kids will be kids’ issue. If a girl had done this do you think she should be punished more harshly because it’s not “acceptable” behaviour for a girl but is for a boy?

I think it's important to nip it in the bud the minute teenagers start with the attitude of doing what they want just because they can. They were trespassing.

Please don't excuse bad behaviour with "boys will boys". Yes they will be from time to time so they need reminding to behave themselves.

@plentyofsunshine but we need to stop the excuse of boys will be boys. Parents of sons need to stop using this phrase

They were the fun kids you mean. Getting up to a bit of mischief isn’t a result of bad parenting, which you seem to be suggesting by saying it was only the “rough” kids

Surely if the club have cctv they know if the boys climbed over or the gate was left open? I would want an answer to this as for me both are different on how I would deal with it.

But there's been no mention on vandalism?

OP I think both you and the police are right in this instance.

Boys WILL be boys. Perhaps the people who don't think so haven't had much male input in their lives.

However, letting the local copper in your home to tell him off won't hurt either.

He did something wrong, he'll be told off, situation over, move on.

I think there are a number of issues here:

• Astro is expensive and needs to be maintained. If it is normally locked then there is a reason. It should be used in a regulated way, whether that is by the club or if hired out, as a booked facility.
• The right footwear (that might be trainers but it might not) is important and so are aspects like no chewing gum, no pets, no smoking or vaping. Your DS and his friends may not have been doing these things, but the club needs to protect its facility.
• I think it’s a good thing if the police are taking this seriously. I have had involvement in a number of sports facilities and it is really wearisome how they are abused by “just kids being kids”. A cricket club my DC played for regularly had its pitch (which unfortunately was not lockable) damaged. Athletics tracks have also fallen victim to having mud dragged over them and inappropriate footwear worn on them. All of this means that those who pay to take part in the sport there cannot do so until the issue is fixed.
• There is also the safety aspect. Usually YP would be supervised on the facility or at least if they hired it, would have to agree to some basic safety regs. Just going on and playing when they shouldn’t could lead to issues. What if there had been an accident? Would the club be to blame?

If he and his mates want to play football they should find a public park and go there. Or hire the astro in a proper way.

Massive Under reaction from you. What are they going to break into next? I would be reading the riot act. Who the fuck do they think they are that they think that they can access private property which such disregard.

I don't like boys will be boys, that's just an excuse.
Talk to DS, explain it was wrong and he could have got hurt or damaged the pitch. The police obviously aren't overly worried and are just going to let them off with a warning.
All seems a bit OTT but it's not my property.

I suppose the other question is does this happen a lot, children climbing in and fooling about and maybe causing damage, your lot may be the ones who got caught and the owners want it stopped.

I’m not convinced that any criminal offence at all has been committed, so I don’t see that any more than a “warning” could be given in any event.

Does the cctv show them climbing in, or walking through an open gate, or opening a gate to get in? Whatever way they shouldn't have been in there although climbing in would be worse. They are only getting a warning, which seems fair.

To me the act of using the football pitch for it's intended purpose but just not paying for it is more theft or trespassing than ASB?

But tell him to take whatever punishment is given and apologise and move on. Tell him to offer to pay the owner of the pitch the fee it costs to use it?

It's not really for you to question it as he's clearly done something wrong. But yeah. It's definitely on the milder scale of what I would consider could constitute ASB. Unless they damaged the pitch, it was very late and they woke up the neighbours etc.