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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Would you share something with your colleagues that was told to you in confidence?

63 replies

Givenup2026 · 25/02/2026 09:38

Materially it doesn’t affect me, as I was lucky enough to secure a job somewhere else.

However, I do know it will directly affect them (how much I don’t know), but I’m also aware that knowing early will make little to no difference.

So AIBU for considering telling them? It definitely feels like a heavy weight on my shoulders.

OP posts:
Goditsmemargaret · 25/02/2026 10:03

Absolutely do not tell. Be professional.

Original poster
Givenup2026 · 25/02/2026 10:03

NuffSaidSam · 25/02/2026 10:01

Omg if it's three days just keep your mouth shut!

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That’s what I got told! But other redundancies people just disappear overnight and they’re not even allowed to say goodbye. So it feels odd that they’ll announce this one.

OP posts:
NuffSaidSam · 25/02/2026 10:01

Givenup2026 · 25/02/2026 10:00

I feel like knowing 3 working days before the restructuring happens won’t make much difference IMO.

However I know my colleagues will definitely feel crushed.

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Omg if it's three days just keep your mouth shut!

Original poster
Givenup2026 · 25/02/2026 10:00

NuffSaidSam · 25/02/2026 09:56

In that case I would consider what it would do to your reputation/career if it got out that you'd been indiscrete/had revealed confidential information.

If it genuinely makes no difference having the information early (though I fail to see how this can be, forewarned is forearmed) then keep it to yourself.

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I feel like knowing 3 working days before the restructuring happens won’t make much difference IMO.

However I know my colleagues will definitely feel crushed.

OP posts:
NuffSaidSam · 25/02/2026 09:56

Givenup2026 · 25/02/2026 09:51

It’s specifically work related. My manager told me. I coincidentally found another job, I just got “lucky” so to speak.

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In that case I would consider what it would do to your reputation/career if it got out that you'd been indiscrete/had revealed confidential information.

If it genuinely makes no difference having the information early (though I fail to see how this can be, forewarned is forearmed) then keep it to yourself.

Original poster
Givenup2026 · 25/02/2026 09:51

NuffSaidSam · 25/02/2026 09:41

I'd need more information.

Is it specifically work related? Who told you and why are you not allowed to tell anyone e.g. were you told because of your position at the company or did get some good gossip because you're friends with someone.

Why would them knowing early not make any difference? It seems like it made a difference to you because you say you've been able to secure a new job.

It’s specifically work related. My manager told me. I coincidentally found another job, I just got “lucky” so to speak.

OP posts:
StandFirm · 25/02/2026 09:50

If it's divulging a strategic plan, then 100% don't because there's probably a number of reasons why this plan hasn't been made official yet. It might not be ready and it's awful to share half-baked plans that will freak people out for nothing. You might also get into trouble for it if the leak is traced back to you.
If it's a whistleblowing situation, you are obligated to do something about it and labour laws cover you.

Allisgoodtoday · 25/02/2026 09:47

Well, not normally, no. It was told in confidence so the information is not "yours" to pass on. And if it was just gossip, I'd probably say that I'd prefer not to be part of office gossip, thank you.

However, there are instances where I would have to take it further - a safeguarding issue perhaps. In which case I'd immediately stop them and say, you're telling me in confidence but this is something serious which I can't keep to myself, I'm sorry but I'm legally/morally bound to take this further... You might also need to do so.

The same would apply if it were serious fraud/illegal practice and I'd be complicit by knowing and keeping the knowledge, in which case see above.

Original poster
Givenup2026 · 25/02/2026 09:43

BrucesBarAndGrill · 25/02/2026 09:41

Depends on what it is. Usually I'd say no because someone told you in confidence and you need to respect that, however if it was something that needed to come out I'd probably encourage them to speak up themselves.

There’s going to be a massive restructuring coming their way. Management lines will be changed (and some will be completely removed).

It was implied there would be redundancies (and I know of one of the affected).

OP posts:
ICouldHaveCheckedFirst · 25/02/2026 09:42

No.
I was known at work for keeping my mouth shut!

Shoxfordian · 25/02/2026 09:41

No because you should keep your integrity and not share information given to you in confidence

NuffSaidSam · 25/02/2026 09:41

I'd need more information.

Is it specifically work related? Who told you and why are you not allowed to tell anyone e.g. were you told because of your position at the company or did get some good gossip because you're friends with someone.

Why would them knowing early not make any difference? It seems like it made a difference to you because you say you've been able to secure a new job.

BrucesBarAndGrill · 25/02/2026 09:41

Depends on what it is. Usually I'd say no because someone told you in confidence and you need to respect that, however if it was something that needed to come out I'd probably encourage them to speak up themselves.

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