15 year-old know it all son

I agree with the pp who says to try to work with him on the fact its fine to have different opinions to others, but that he needs to be careful in how he communicates it because it can come across as disrespectful and that will start to affect his relationships if he's not careful. Plus it means he's not bringing anyone along with him if they get annoyed by the way he's phrasing things.

Any lads I've known who have acted in this way were either autistic and it came across as disrespectful but actually they were just being very matter of fact and their opinion was just very concrete. Or it's been a confidence issue and they're feeling very unsure in themselves and are effectively trying to fake it till they make it.

So I would work on confidence and self esteem with him as well as clear information on how phrasing and tone matters. But I do think op that unless you're suspecting ND that sometimes you have to pick your battles and decide if its something to let slide and internally roll your eyes or if it's a hill to die on. I think maintaining an open relationship through the next few years and sticking with them is what brings them back round on the other side of it all.

My 15 year old knew everything. It was so annoying as I used to really like talking to him about stuff when he was younger, he was interested in so many things. We used to chat about news and politics during dinner - how smug I was at how knowledgeable and informed he was!
Then suddenly he knew everything and it was no longer fun talking to him!
He also likes to be right, so it wasn't ok to disagree with him, he wasn't happy til you came around to his view.
He's 16 now and it's still quite bad but he is better at accepting different views.

I am looking forward to when he's stops knowing everything as the interesting person is still there underneath.

Yes and we have moved on from that now.

I read OP as saying h is very knowledge about the subject but s quotes back at h usually talking bollocks, it's that's talking random rubbish not h.
I'm sorry if I read that incorrectly OP.

I've got a know-it-all son too. He is 16 but it's the same. It's annoying that he knows everything much better than I ever will, but he'll grow out of it!

He also 'managed my expectations' about his GCSEs, did well but not as well as he was capable of doing (he's very clever but did the minimum of work) and will be annoyed when his sister gets better grades than he did in a year's time. But he has 'locked in' for his A-levels (and actually does seem to be studying a lot) so that's a good thing anyway.

Did OP mean astromony but said astrology instead? 🙄

This is common at that age - my son went through it as well, we just asked that if he had a different opinion to someone to be respectful in how he argues his point. I think it is great that our children feel they can question what they are being told, especially when they form arguments to back up their case.
I am not saying this is you OP but some parents do have the attitude of “I know what’s best, don’t argue back” which isn’t helpful and hinders their child’s critical thinking and reasoning skills that they need to develop for the real world.

He's just a normal 15 Yr old , he'll soon realise he doesn't know everything and wise up . For now just let him give his opinions and fully listen , he's just expressing himself . Teenagers get such a hard time these days its a tough time to navigate even tougher now with social media and other pressures.

Just leave him to it, he'll learn he's not the smart arse he thinks he is

BlueMoonBlueCheese
Why give this pat answer when op has literally just said,

“we are really not telling him off in those moments, we're trying to open up conversation and be supportive”
??

I am not sure there are many that can say they got through parenting a 15 year old boy completely unscathed.

Some will come along and say their 15 year old's were perfect specimens of the human race and they never ever pushed their luck or boundaries. To this I say that they just forgot what is was really like that year.

My ds is very sporty and was in various teams at that age. So the parents from each sport would socialise after events quite often. So there was a big ratio of 15 year old parents in one place at one time. We were definitely not alone in our thinking, and most of the boys played up in one way or another that year.

But they have mostly all turned out fine young men OP. It is just important to lay the ground rules of what is acceptable and what is not.

@Spiritedlight this too shall pass. At 15 DS would argue the wall was black, not white. We tried hard to deflect the comments but it was a challenging time with little or no listening to other perspectives. He had uncontestable views based on many things: politics, the police, social justice, liberal arts v stem, his headmaster, whether the sun was fucking shining.

He's 31 now, married, expecting a baby and has a PhD. He started to revert to his chilled, sunny self when he was about 22, getting back to base at about 25 when I think the frontal cortex is fully formed. Be glad he has the confidence in his nurture and security at home to kick off at home. At this stage it's all about the export model.

15 year old boys do know everything, obviously!

My DS1 was like this, not rude, but wouldn't accept any advice about school or exams etc.

We had to leave him to it, for fear of damaging our relationship with him. He had to find his own way and work out that if you don't work you will fails your exams.

He did OK in his GCSE's and A Levels, however did enough to get on a music degree course. It has honestly been the making of him. He is now a lovely young adult with a growing following as an electronic musician.

Hang in there @Spiritedlight, just support him and things will get better

He’s immature- all adolescents are immature and your role is to support him as he gains life experience and maturity.

He will alternate between wanting the safety of children and the freedom of adulthood, but it’s a teetering sort of time.

You can be a role model for him of a happy and well balanced adult living a good life. Give him something to aspire to but don’t put him under a microscope of what homework has he done. Show him how to disagree gracefully. Be patient and calm. Keep your boundaries.

Firstly, many teenage boys are like this.

arguing with them just feeds it.
focus solely on outcomes. Is he doing as well as he wants to at school? If not then put rewards and consequences in place. If so then ignore as much as possible.

on a separate note I think you have confused astronomy and astrology. Astronomy is the scientific study of stars.
astrology is the belief that the stars impact how we act on earth through our star signs (which stars were in the sky when we were born) and I don’t think anyone really believes in it these days

My DS was like that, but he seems to be growing out of it now (17). They like to test out these behaviours at home with their parents, as a safe place to practise in. I doubt they do it with teachers or other kids’ parents. It’s bloody annoying and very difficult not to react to, especially if all you want is to sit and chat peacefully over dinner.
If my DS continues to justify why the sky is green, I just put my hands up and say yes, of course you’re right, you know everything.

I think your description of this as a "defence mechanism" is pretty accurate. Let's face most 15 year old are not that knowlegable. Not an easy thing to accept so he can't accept it. All you can do is provide him with the tools he needs. Ultimately he might have to fail in order to gain enough insight into his actual level of ability and improve.n

Maybe it was intended to make you reflect.

Why does he think you are telling him off?

Children's communication skills are a reflection of their parents communication skills or lack thereof.
Maybe you don't realise it but the tone you are using is critical, negative etc.
Maybe you never praise him, it's hard for any reader to say with the limited information.
Maybe try and take him for a meal or a walk and talk about the good things in his life and gently try and find out if there is anything worrying him?

Astronomy or astrology? No wonder DS is mocking DH.