If you had kids young and were judged for it how do you feel seeing the current trendy opinion has switched to praising young motherhood?

You managed to find a random man on the street’s facebook profile 10 years on?

Literally everyone is telling you there is no “trendy opinion” that teenage pregnancy is advisable, yet you’re still insisting.
One random arsehole on Facebook is hardly proof. If you didn’t like his opinion 10 years ago why would you put any merit on it now?

I think your perception of this is false, sorry.

I had my first DC young 17 years ago and I remember articles in the news etc talking about mums "leaving it too late" blaming it on things like career planning etc and talk of higher chances of chromosomal abnormalities.

I remember feeling out of place in the NCT class and only one of the other NCT mums was over 40, she felt out of place too and we somewhat bonded over it.

I had more DC aged 30/33 and I never get anything like the same judgement about having them because it's "normal". The judgement about DS1 has never ever gone away - people are always surprised when I say how old he is. The nicest conversations have been just when they treat him exactly as my other children.

People just have an opinion on whatever women do, someone will think it is wrong, you can't win, the best thing is to ignore all of it and do what suits you.

The horrible man you saw on FB is just a plain old misogynist, not really surprising he has continued to judge and belittle women without any logic to his complaints.

Isn't there a sweet spot somewhere in the middle? Ideally we probably shouldn't be popping children out whilst we are doing our GCSEs and we probably shouldn't be trying for children in our late 40's because we wanted to party for 25 years first. Biologically speaking both ends of the spectrum have their own problems.
I had my first child 19 years ago just after my 23rd birthday, I don't recall feeling any judgement about my age but I was working full-time and we had our own home. It was obvious we were self supporting so perhaps that had something to do with it.

Obviously they didn’t have time before, but on average they do not go on to further education in any meaningful numbers after.

/End Thread.

I think you’re only seeing what you want to see to be frank!

Today’s 16 year olds don’t want to get pregnant either. That is still concerning for most teenagers plus most parents of 16 year olds wouldn’t want that for their kids unfortunately. It is still not the done thing.

Today’s 26 year olds don’t regret having kids that age either. It really depends on the circles you move in. I’m in my 20s, high earner, live down south. Having kids at 26 isn’t desirable, loads of people my age leave it longer than that by choice. You act like we’re all envious of you when that’s not the case…

my thought process has been, I don’t want kids until I’m married, own a large enough house & am established enough in my career, because that’s the example my parents set for me. I want my kids to have a good lifestyle and similar opportunities. Life isn’t easy when you’re not reliant on state support, the majority of people in their 20s down south are going to struggle to buy a house without financial assistance.

Exactly. I’ve never heard or read this anywhere. Who is urging women 18-25 to have a child? The right age would be when a woman is able to support that child equally.

18 is different from 15/16.
18 is a young adult who will most likely have finished high school, whilst a 15/16 year old is unlikely to have even got their GCSEs and a 15 year old is under the age of concent.
You may disagree with me but I a big difference between the two groups

No, higher socioeconomic status is directly linked to women having children at an older age. Lesser educated girls and women, earning less, are much more likely to have children younger.
That is very much the reality in the UK.

I can't say I've noticed the trend.

That said, I think there's a difference between not recommending/advocating for teenage pregnancy and judging it.

I would recommend anyone have a teenage pregnancy because it's a difficult time to have a child for a number of reasons.

That said, I wouldn't judge some for it either. I also wouldn't judge someone for having an abortion either.

There are good and bad mothers are every age.

A gynaecologist ones told me that the best time to have a child from a fertility/physically/maturity/financial and relationship never lines up. The optimium is different for each factor.

I found in my late 20s that I can't have any. Thankfully it would have been the same for me at a younger age or I would have spent forever wondering what if.

I genuinely think if a child has love, security, shelter and safety that's the most important thing - not the mother's age.

I think its unfair to say young mums should always be judged, i had my first young (18) and she has grown up into a lovely young lady, despite everyones judgements i was too young to have a child, why judge someone on their age?.

Absolutely this!

I don't mean any disrespect (I know from experience that teenagers can make fantastic parents), but I don't think many people would seriously advocate teen pregnancy as the ideal.

If you have read this I would guess that it came from people writing 'shocking' opinions for attention, or potentially from ultra-religious and ultra-conservative people

I do think more people are arguing that the norm should be mid, or more rarely, early 20's due to biological factors though.

There are pros and cons whatever age you choose to have children. People just love judging women regardless of when/if they choose to reproduce.

I don't think I would say that there really has been a change in trend on this.

I think most people think 16 is younger than is ideal, at least in the modern world, to have kids.

I do think it has been the case for a long time that middle class people have their kids later - sometimes a lot later - and judge working class women, and sometimes men too, for having kids younger, especially under 25. And I think there is still a lot of that judgement. It's seen as chavvy. (Terrible word but I think the right descriptor of how people think about this.)

As far as judging older women I think there is some of that if you start getting into the 40s. There is awareness of course that it can be harder to have a child later into the 30s and 40s.

As far as recent discussions in the news, I think what we are seeing is possibly the beginnings of a social correction. Childbearing has been pushed so far back, secondary to career, that it's been negative for a lot of people. They would like kids but can't get themselves into a stable position in terms of finances and career in the years when it would make the most sense to have them. There is no real reason it has to be that way, so it would be a good idea to have a shift to changing things up a bit for a better balance.

So far however I don't see anything concrete in that direction and the kind of people who were judgy about younger mums still are.

I know a couple of women who had their first child when they were 16/17 and they wouldn’t praise teen pregnancy! They’re great mums but wouldn’t recommend being a mum that young. I was mid 20s.

Is it every other week? You can find anything you want if you look for it. As an ancient geriatric 37 year old, I can find information to support the fact I will miscarry or have a disabled baby. I can also find information to support the fact it could be fine 🤷‍♀️

It hasn’t changed. Reform would like it to, because they want to control women.

You hear less moral outrage about teenager mothers because with available contraceptives, MAP and abortion, the rates have diminished down to a relatively minuscule amount.

Where is the current trendy opinion to praising young motherhood? Haven’t seen anything on this? My mum had my sister at 16. Absolutely would not recommend.

Telling women off for “leaving it too late”, scare-mongering about increased likelihood of Down’s syndrome etc has been going on for YEARS. Not new.