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AIBU?

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Original poster

To block this flaky Mum friend and ignore her from now on?

218 replies

RentalRut · 22/02/2026 20:52

DS had his birthday party as softplay yesterday. It was a pay per head party with 20 guests, so not exactly cheap.

I've known this Mum friend since our children were babies. She had rsvp'd to say that her DS would love to join us at DS's party however they didn't show and there was no message or call to explain why. The Mum friend has always been a bit flaky and always complains that she's stressed juggling her kids and work etc. Her life seems a bit chaotic and she always acts like shes drowning. Fair enough, but not turning up to a party after saying you would and wasting a space that someone else could have had is just rude imo.

She's now messaged me this evening apologising and explaining that she completely forgot as she's had a busy week etc etc, the usual excuses. I've decided not to reply and just block her as I'm sick of the constant excuses and let downs.

Aibu to block her for this and ignore her from now on? She obviously thinks her time is more important than ours and I'm totally sick of it.

OP posts:
User79853257976 · 22/02/2026 21:02

Strawberryfruitstarburst · 22/02/2026 20:55

You know what, I sometimes feel like I’m drowning and life is hard, juggling work and kids but saying you’ll show up to a kids party and then not showing up is just not good enough unless there’s an emergency. Saying she forgot is an awful thing to say. Once we get the invite, we put it on the calendar once accepted, it’s not hard.

If she’s got form I would agree with your approach and maybe it will be a lesson to her that she can’t treat people in this way.

Edited

How is it an awful thing to say? It’s just the truth.

Original poster
RentalRut · 22/02/2026 21:02

WhereYouLeftIt · 22/02/2026 21:00

"I've decided not to reply and just block her as I'm sick of the constant excuses and let downs."
So it's not just about this party then? "Constant excuses" suggests this is the latest incident in a long line?

This is the first time she's not shown up to a party but she often cancels plans last minute are turns up late to things.

I feel like she thinks her time is more important than mine.

OP posts:
Weirdnailhelp · 22/02/2026 21:02

You will regret blocking her and creating a drama out of this. My kids are in their 20s now and I’m telling you you’re in for the long haul with this stuff so just let it wash over you.

cadburyegg · 22/02/2026 21:01

I wouldn’t block her, that seems a bit dramatic. Just say ok no worries then slowly fade her out. Be polite if you see her but don’t make any plans to meet up.

Moonpye · 22/02/2026 21:01

It sounds like she's struggling? I know it's annoying when you've paid but I'd expect the odd no show to a kids party. I have 3 kids and there seems to be a party for one or another most weekends. I forgot one once too, I felt really bad but these things happen and the mum was fine about it. You don't have to be friends with her though, it doesn't sound like you want to be!

EscapeTheCastle · 22/02/2026 21:01

Send back a nice message. Why wouldn't you? If you want to step back from her do so without creating upset. Managing friendships when the kids are young is a lot like being at work. Be professional at all times because you will be possibly bumping into each other for some years to come.

Original poster
RentalRut · 22/02/2026 21:00

The kids are school friends but are now in different classes so don't play as much as they used to.

DH thinks I'm being a tad dramatic but it's a step too far for me this time.

OP posts:
WhereYouLeftIt · 22/02/2026 21:00

"I've decided not to reply and just block her as I'm sick of the constant excuses and let downs."
So it's not just about this party then? "Constant excuses" suggests this is the latest incident in a long line?

Weirdnailhelp · 22/02/2026 20:59

I get you’re annoyed but stop being so dramatic! You don’t know what’s going on in her life. I’m a bit of a drama queen myself and it’s come back to bite me on the bum. Take a breath and reply, “no worries, I hope all is OK.”

gamerchick · 22/02/2026 20:58

Jenry · 22/02/2026 20:54

Sounds like she needs a bit of support. Not blocking

These type of people don't need support..they want scaffolding and they'll suck you dry if you let them.

Damnd · 22/02/2026 20:56

I hate this blocking culture.. it's so cruel and horrible.. dont do that

firstofallimadelight · 22/02/2026 20:56

I wouldn’t block her but I wouldn’t invite her son again

caljohn · 22/02/2026 20:56

I wouldn’t block someone for being forgetful.

NerrSnerr · 22/02/2026 20:56

How old are the children? Are they school friends now or only friends through you as a parent.

if they’re young and only are friends though you I’d just drift away and not invite again. If the children are friends I wouldn’t make an effort myself but wouldn’t block as you may need their number in the future.

Marylou2 · 22/02/2026 20:55

I wouldn't block her. Just reply ' No worries' and don't contact her directly again. Nod politely if you see her in public but don't expend another ounce of energy on someone who isn't worth it.

TeenLifeMum · 22/02/2026 20:55

I can understand it’s annoying but she’s apologised so I think your reaction to it is extreme. Are you really so perfect?

Strawberryfruitstarburst · 22/02/2026 20:55

You know what, I sometimes feel like I’m drowning and life is hard, juggling work and kids but saying you’ll show up to a kids party and then not showing up is just not good enough unless there’s an emergency. Saying she forgot is an awful thing to say. Once we get the invite, we put it on the calendar once accepted, it’s not hard.

If she’s got form I would agree with your approach and maybe it will be a lesson to her that she can’t treat people in this way.

Jenry · 22/02/2026 20:54

Sounds like she needs a bit of support. Not blocking