Forgot to take my friend to her hospital appointment- how do I fix this!?

You are given the option of sedation for a colonoscopy (though don't have to have it) and if you have been sedated, you are not allowed to drive home and are told you need to be accompanied. Also, although it's exploratory, it's not pleasant and it's quite invasive. People are understandably nervous and many prefer to have someone with them for moral support before and after the procedure

what she actually wrote was 'colosopy' a non existant procedure, she then changed that to 'coloscopy' another non existant procedure. On the third attempt she got it right. ,So it is understandable that people were confused about which particular similar sounding actual procedure her friend going to undergo, and also understandable that people may think that she's not actually that interested as she doesn't seem to know what procedure the friend was having.

The OP wrote colonoscopy instead of colposcopy, which are 2 very different procedures.

She never bothered to correct it in her post (or couldn't edit). Only OP knows.

If not bothered, I think the OP has an answer to her post.

Why the horrid smug tone?
Here's a forum in which people offer their own experience to respond to people with dilemmas. OP has had alot of people berating her for being distracted by a sick child from a favour to a friend.
Whilst I am of course aware not everyone's experience is the same, my understanding is a colposcopy is an exploritory procedure, and, if further treatment us needed, a more invasive procedure may be required. I am happy to be corrected on this.
Speaking from my own experience, and that of my friends, the OPs friend would not have needed support to get to and from the appointment, and, as such, may be laying the guilt on a bit thickly. I waa trying to help assuage some of this guilt, as the OP is obviously feeling bad.
I do get tired of the tone people jump to on this forum, we all have our own experience/advice to offer, there's no need to be so agressive.

I'd just like to say that a colonoscopy is not necessarily a scary experience. I've had two and although I was nervous and it's not something I'd choose to do again, it wasn't very unpleasant and it didn't hurt. Also, because I opted not to have sedation (I just had gas and air instead), I only had to wait for about half an hour afterwards and was given tea and biscuits, and then I was allowed to drive myself home. I understand that many people prefer to have someone with them though.

i think as much as you didn’t do it intentionally, this has probably had a huge impact on her. A colonoscopy is a really really unpleasant and scary experience, and the hospital needs to know who will be collecting you in order to allow you to be released. I can imagine that her having to scramble around last minute to try and find someone to get her there and pick her up was a huge stress at an already very stressful time. She is totally within her rights to feel hugely let down by this as it happened at a time when she really will have needed support. There is nothing you can do to change it now though, so give her lots of space and apologise sincerely when the time is appropriate.

Why the horrid smug tone?
Here's a forum in which people offer their own experience to respond to people with dilemmas. OP has had alot of people berating her for being distracted by a sick child from a favour to a friend.
Whilst I am of course aware not everyone's experience is the same, my understanding is a colposcopy is an exploritory procedure, and, if further treatment us needed, a more invasive procedure may be required. I am happy to be corrected on this.
Speaking from my own experience, and that of my friends, the OPs friend would not have needed support to get to and from the appointment, and, as such, may be laying the guilt on a bit thickly. I waa trying to help assuage some of this guilt, as the OP is obviously feeling bad.
I do get tired of the tone people jump to on this forum, we all have our own experience/advice to offer, there's no need to be so agressive.

Bloody hell. You know you have to have a controlled diet for several days AND take really strong laxatives for two days which basically gives you horrendous diarrhoea for about 48 hours.

The thought of then having to do that AGAIN plus the anxiety of the actual procedure but sure….the friend is being dramatic

It was a genuine mistake. Your child was unwell and you just forgot. Personally I think your friend’s reply is a bit dramatic and over the top.

Do you think that it's possible not every colposcopy is done the same?

It can be done under GA/sedation depending on what they find/think they've found, and it can become very invasive and painful.

Your experience is they didnt see/find anything unusual. So, off you walked your 2 miles.

In cases, they find cancerous/pre cancerous, masses down there.

So, here's one for you. Maybe you don't know it all?

It may or may not be a minor procedure. Lucky for you you could measure the procedure in seconds, not even minutes.

As for blood - and yes, I appreciate this isn’t the context you were using it - I was warned I might bleed during the procedure and I did.

As for what the OP’s friend wants? Not blood but a non flakey friend who follows through on a commitment?

Thats why taxis were invented

If they can’t scrape enough cells off the cervix they also send you for one. It’s a very minor procedure over and done with in less than a minute and also no need not to not drive home afterwards! No sedation etc.
op I think your friend is being an attention seeking drama queen! You’ve apologised multiple times to her and offered to pick her up! What more does she want? Blood?!?!

Agree entirely.
I’m long term single, by choice, and don’t have family living nearby.
I’m independent and resilient, and typically deal with all life’s challenges on my own. I hate asking for help, particularly from friends who have busy lives.
One time, I asked a friend a favour, which was to collect me from hospital after a GA for a gynae procedure. I was perfectly happy to make my own way there, wait there on my own, but I knew the hospital would not release me to the care of a taxi driver, so I asked a friend to pick me up. This would have been a round trip of 25 minutes, no more. She readily agreed. Then on the day, when I was back on the day ward, in pain and puking, she kept badgering me about what time I’d be discharged. I didn’t know, as had no idea what time the surgeon would be doing his post-op ward round. After about two hours of that, she said she wouldn’t be able to do it. She didn’t suggest any alternative, or even apologise, just said she’d have to drop her son to training and couldn’t do it. I had to wait til another friend finished work at 8pm, then drove 20 minutes to get to me, then dropped me home. It added about an hour to that friends day but she did it without hesitation.

I’ve never forgotten how awful I felt when the first friend let me down with such an excuse (training is a weekly thing, it didn’t creep up on her, she could have asked his friends parents to bring him home, or she could have not committed to helping in the first place) and it has unquestionably affected our friendship.

I have to have colonoscopies and I am very grateful for kind people who give me lifts but I have to know 100% that they will not let me down. It’s a very stressful experience because not only do you have to deal with the prep beforehand but you get some results after too and they are not always positive. I don’t blame her for feeling let down but I wouldn’t break a friendship over one mistake if it was the only time.

If she is single, she will be used to dealing with life alone. Asking a friend to take you to an appointment like this is a significant thing and the day itself would be deeply stressful anyway. Being let down at the last minute is horrendous for anything - a taxi not turning up when you are going to see a film or a show or trying to catch a train. If you are facing a health crisis being let down when you are a single person who is already facing it alone is likely to make you feel utterly shit at a point where you though you could rely on someone taking you there.

@user295038904830290 nails it here.

There is so much married couple privilege in this thread. If you are single, you don't have anyone whose commitment & job it is to look after you in these times.

If you ask a favour of this sort as a single woman, you are making yourself quite vulnerable. You are putting trust into someone who does not have to put you first. And indeed @MamaBee22 showed that when push comes to shove, she did not put her friend first.

Of course, there were reasons for that. But I think the emotional truth of this situation is that in a time of stress and need, the OP's friend trusted @MamaBee22 and @MamaBee22 did not live up to that trust. Her fiend made herself reliant & vulnerable on the OP, but the OP did not repay this trust or remember this vulnerability.

And is now making excuse after excuse ...

This is why a lot of single people do not ask for friend's favours - failure shows us where we are in a social hierarchy. As does this thread.

This thread is extraordinary.

It's very easy to tell who you'd want as a friend and who has never had cancer or supported someone who has gone through a cancer diagnosis.

All these people suggesting this is a selfish drama queen are projecting such self-centredness themselves. It is the height of selfishness to think that forgetting offered support in a situation likely to be so significant to another person is no big deal and doesn't require more than a couple of sorry texts.

Yes we can all do things alone. Yes we can all get a taxi if we can afford it. If you are relying on that person, you aren't going to expect to need to make last minute alternative travel arrangements and that itself is an unneeded stress for a medical appointment. It's no joke missing any medical appointment because of waiting list times; the fear of missing it would probably be horrendous on top of inherent worry about what the results would be. If it's cancer related, these days you could be dead before it's rescheduled; the media is full of stories like this. Just because your colposcopy was fine and didn't need anaesthetic doesn't mean everyone elses is the same.