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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be so glad WFH became a thing (and to absolutely hate anyone who tries to curtail its availability)

414 replies

Designless · 22/02/2026 09:55

It's just life changingly good

OP posts:
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Binus · 26/02/2026 21:31

FlyingPandas · 26/02/2026 21:27

I can see the huge benefits of WFH, especially for parents with young DC to manage, and/or for established adults in their 30s/40s/50s who already have a social network established, in that they can work far more productively at home and save on commuting costs and time.

That said, though, I think WFH must be incredibly isolating for younger adults who might not have an established social network where they are living. It really depends on an individual's circumstances surely? I have such happy work memories from my 20s - straight out of the office into the pub, made loads of friends through work, ready made social life etc etc. I can totally see why WFH is ideal for those juggling family life and caring responsibilities but I don't think it's necessarily right for everyone at every stage of life.

You're right that it depends on an individual's circumstances, but this does also apply to those starting out too- they're a diverse group just like any other age cohort. A younger adult might only be able to access a particular job opportunity because of remote work, and the ready made social life isn't desirable and may be actively detrimental for some people. Equally, there's middle aged and older people who really benefit from working in person too. It's really varied, I think that's the best way to look at it.

FlyingPandas · 26/02/2026 21:27

I can see the huge benefits of WFH, especially for parents with young DC to manage, and/or for established adults in their 30s/40s/50s who already have a social network established, in that they can work far more productively at home and save on commuting costs and time.

That said, though, I think WFH must be incredibly isolating for younger adults who might not have an established social network where they are living. It really depends on an individual's circumstances surely? I have such happy work memories from my 20s - straight out of the office into the pub, made loads of friends through work, ready made social life etc etc. I can totally see why WFH is ideal for those juggling family life and caring responsibilities but I don't think it's necessarily right for everyone at every stage of life.

Yellowstonemaddnesa · 26/02/2026 21:14

Life is fleeting and we have a short time being actually active and conscious of our lives in that time
Working from home is something i can't do but dh can and it's made an enormous difference tonus all.
He's had to go in more but I think 2/3 days is a good balanxe.
It's just a weight off in so many way !

FairViewRosie25 · 26/02/2026 21:10

I’m semi retired now but when I WFH during lockdown they got at least 4 hours a day more out of me. Logged in at 6am never logged out before 7pm. So yes without commute (only 25 mins each way) much better option.

Cakeandcardio · 26/02/2026 21:05

TempestTost · 23/02/2026 02:45

Do you know why there is an 8 hour day?

Employers used to routinely make people work for much longer shifts. Limits to work days were in large part in response to workers rights campaigns and advocacy - that was deemed long enough for workday that an employer could afford to pay an amount that could support a person to live, while also allowing workers to have reasonable home and personal lives.

Employers are generally paying for your time. If you work less, they will then want to pay you less. No one wants to pay a full days wage for 4 hours of work.

Yes. I have a degree in History (alongside English) and whilst I very much admire Robert Owen, and with living in Central Scotland have visited New Lanark numerous times and see him as being a wonderful pioneer, I think that the work we undertake today is (mostly) very much removed from the factories of the early 19th century. Whilst 8 hours must have seemed very fair in allowing for produce to be churned out whilst also allowing people a greater degree of 'free' time, it could be argued that stating that all people working in offices today are capable of doing the same amount of work as one another in 8 hours is a bit bizarre. As a teacher, I know that the brain cannot concentrate on tasks for extremely long periods of time. The workplace has changed and employers need to change too. I think that those who will survive in business going forward will be those pioneers who can see a new and better way and adapt (much like Robert Owen!).

Designless · 23/02/2026 20:25

TempestTost · 23/02/2026 10:23

Even if that were so, they would have no obligation to create a wfh job.It is their money and business. As the person accepting the money, all you can do is say you won't work for them if you don't like the position, whether that is because it requires being in an office, or on a factory line tinning beans.

But is it so? Maybe in your sector at the moment. But have you seen the youth unemployment numbers lately?

And in every stack of resumes I get sent from my boss to look at, among the others there are a number of well educated Indians and often a Nigerian, and you can bet they are willing to work in the location the employer wants them to, if local candidates won't. (Though my position is in an old mining town and people are not going to turn down any good job because they prefer not to commute.)

It's like you've never heard of employment rights or trade unions.

OP posts:
Auburngal · 23/02/2026 18:41

Sometimes when you ring a company and get an agent in the call centre, I often hear their neighbouring colleagues’ calls. As I’m guessing, too close together, poor microphone on headset etc

PissedOffNeighbour22 · 23/02/2026 18:16

I’m hybrid but have been since before Covid so do not understand all the hate for WFH that I see on MN.

I do think that people’s circumstances should be checked though - if you don’t have a quiet, suitable place to work or have inadequate childcare then WFH shouldn’t be allowed.

I have to go into the office more since Covid due to all the fuss over supposed pisstakers when it all kicked off in the papers. I’d be much happier if I didn’t have to go in at all. My team aren’t in my office and the T&S to visit them is restricted so I don’t see them much anyway. Pointless waste of my time and money dragging myself in 2-3 times a week.

40YearOldDad · 23/02/2026 18:08

YourFluentQuoter · 23/02/2026 17:18

Get a grip Dad. Honestly, you're just looking like a twat considering you're arguing the over-reach point about 2 pages ago that someone WFH could be a real reach of GDPR breach if their partner popped in and said bye and gave then a kiss.

Which very likely didn't even happen in the 1st place.

Go and eat your tea mate.

Normally when people resort to such a reply is when they have nothing constructive to say, or a valid argument. I assume you have neither anything fluent to say or quote. See I can be a dick also.

My point was and still is that just because some people can work from home, doesn’t mean they should when they can’t perform their job properly and I see it day in day out across multiple agencies. My replies were merely highlighting this fact and trying to show people who justify such incidents, perhaps with extreme counter argument scenarios but it still stands that what we let slide in one situation, we’d take great umbridge in another.

ToffeePennie · 23/02/2026 17:24

I am so thankful for it. My DH works in a team of 10-12 people mostly men, who do something with computer software. It seems very wasteful and time consuming to force them all to congregate in one office space, where they will all sit and individually work on their own projects. Any cross collaboration is put into work message boards and they have 1 “in person” virtual meeting a day (on zoom) where they demonstrate what they accomplished the day before and what they plan to achieve today.
It must have saved the larger company £££ by not paying for an office space, and it’s helpful to the planet - reducing emissions from cars by 12 people, reducing waste and reducing the costs associated with working outside the home.

YourFluentQuoter · 23/02/2026 17:18

40YearOldDad · 23/02/2026 16:40

Exactly what exactly? I'm not sure this is the 'Gotcha' you think it is.

Anyone who is not invested in a job or doesn't care can share details. No NDA, etc., will stop that, but I'd say Ted is less likely to share work details than someone who overheard or saw they shouldn't have seen, down the pub or in their own social circle. Six degrees of separation becomes a real thing when it's data that shouldn't have been shared.

Get a grip Dad. Honestly, you're just looking like a twat considering you're arguing the over-reach point about 2 pages ago that someone WFH could be a real reach of GDPR breach if their partner popped in and said bye and gave then a kiss.

Which very likely didn't even happen in the 1st place.

Go and eat your tea mate.

CherryShiner77 · 23/02/2026 17:07

I go in 2 days a week and this is perfect for me. it’s nice to see the team but we then scurry off into our own little meeting rooms for most of the day. I have to bring my lunch as there’s nothing around. So I’m not contributing anything to the local economy other than petrol fumes.

I definitely see why people who enjoy being around others miss that contact but they are only a segment of the workforce and there’s a big segment of us that have much improved outcomes by WFH/hybrid. It’s not just the commute time I get back, it’s the time taken up by dressing professionally, packing lunch, getting fuel in the car, packing up heavy bags of kit/equipment (in my case). I reckon I’m 2-2.5hrs per day better off wfh. That’s huge.

gannett · 23/02/2026 17:03

helpfulperson · 23/02/2026 14:44

So basically as well as working full time WFH enables woman to carry on doing all tbe domestic work as well. Thats handy.

Men also WFH and what I hear from my parent friends is that it enables them to do much more of the domestic work than they'd otherwise be able to.

A couple of my friends who are dads absolutely evangelise about how WFH means they're actually present to watch their kids grow up and be proper parents, as opposed to only seeing them in a rush in the morning, and then in a rush at bedtime, or in bad weeks only seeing them asleep.

40YearOldDad · 23/02/2026 17:00

TheBestThingthatAlmostHappened · 23/02/2026 16:38

Before WFH did you attend the customer service surgery and wait your turn for your confidential 10 minute 1-2-1 appointment? Because if you didn't, you have no basis whatsoever to likening a customer service agent working from home instead of in a large open-plan office to a GP.

My compassion is based on the principle that customer service could be anything from a call with Currys about my TV delivery, a call with HMRC about my late tax bill, or a call to my pharmacy to see where my aids medication is.

The nature of the data should not determine the degree of confidentiality to which I am entitled. Yet too often, confidentiality is treated selectively, based on subjective judgments about what is considered morally significant. I didn't cheapen a customer service role, you did that.

Amiable · 23/02/2026 17:00

I have a chronic health condition, WFH 4 days a week and 1 day in the office. It’s an easy (for London) commute of 40 mins each way door to door, but that 1 days absolutely wipes me out.

Without WFH I would definitely not be able to work as much as I do and have no idea how I would support my kids. I am also more productive at home - no distractions!

TheBestThingthatAlmostHappened · 23/02/2026 16:48

BettyBoh · 23/02/2026 16:18

I have WFH 100% since 2017. Moved to a new job in 2023 also 100% WFH. Until recently I would’ve have 100% supported it….
then I had something happen which got out of control. You could argue company culture is the reason why it couldn’t be tackled.

i managed a team of 9 in a busy department. Most of my team were fantastic.

i had one guy who was never really comfortable being managed by a woman. But we got by. He had an old-fashioned attitude to his job (eg didn't trust excel formulas, he would still add up a row of numbers “just to check”). Getting him to embrace automated tasks was difficult, even when I told him it was to allow him more time to branch out more (which it did - our company was growing massively and he wanted to be part of that growth). I couldn’t keep track of how slow he was being as I couldn’t see him not trusting agreed process. He was lying about how long things were taking and overriding automation. He took on new work and became stressed because he couldn’t manage his time. He wouldn’t let go of the old ways, nor would he let go of the new responsibilities. He was overworked through his own stubbornness and mistrust of excel formulas!!

then things got really nasty. When he was angry he would call women in my team and scream and shout at them. Every time I pulled him up on it he denied it. My word against theirs. HR were useless. My boss was useless. He then claimed all the women collaborated to make up lies about him. I was furious. Still no support from HR. They said it could go either way…, he is relying on the ability to deny it every time and the women are all being shouted at, or the women are all lying in collaboration. HR said there was nothing they could do.

I was sure had we all sat in an office it would be completely impossible for him to continue this behaviour. He definitely had a problem with anger towards women. 121 teams calls were an easy way to continue to shout at women until they cried. I was trying to protect my team with no support from my boss or HR. It was a stressful time. i hated the fact we all WFH as he could bypass all behavioural norms. I was really stuck and I couldn’t believe he was getting away with it.
I mentioned it to a friend who said, next time he does it tell them to record it.

when he finally did it to me, my friends words popped into my head: I recorded him on my iPhone. His language was disgraceful. Swearing, sexiest slurs etc, Massive massive error. Without looking into the implications I reported it to HR thinking I had the key to solving this with the recording. I ended up sacked for recording someone without their consent.

That's terrible management by your company.

In the same circumstances, I think we would have been advised not to answer unexpected teams calls and to ask him to book in a meeting, with a witness, and advise him in advance that the meeting would be recorded. I've been told to do that in the past with certain people who are known to be difficult, but they rarely last long.

Several years ago there was an issue with bullying and all non-management staff were told that they must attend an in person meeting which was quite rare at that point in time. Someone from an external department came in, asked us all a lot of questions and we never saw the bully again, idk what happened to her.

That kind of behaviour isn't tolerated here.

JHound · 23/02/2026 16:40

Newyearawaits · 23/02/2026 16:35

I wouldn't consider myself to be bitter or pathetic. I am in tune with the number of people I know who are 'WFH' and abusing their position

I am not talking about people who are rightfully annoyed at colleagues who are terrible workers.

I am talking about those I specifically mentioned.

40YearOldDad · 23/02/2026 16:40

YourFluentQuoter · 23/02/2026 16:28

Exactly.

So the cleaner and the outside contractor have the same glimpse of a screen that a partner may have of a WFH individual.

So not much.

And okay, they wouldn't be bound to the same policies as a low paid employee or contractor.

But the low-paid employee or contractor would be much more likely to pass on information they glimpsed on a laptop if it was beneficial to do so because their job wasn't all that great and not invested in wanting to keep it, than a partner of an employee privy to confidential information who would be potentially risking their loved ones employment.

And that would only be if the sharing of the information was beneficial in some way to the person sharing it so they were actively looking for it/passing it on.

Exactly what exactly? I'm not sure this is the 'Gotcha' you think it is.

Anyone who is not invested in a job or doesn't care can share details. No NDA, etc., will stop that, but I'd say Ted is less likely to share work details than someone who overheard or saw they shouldn't have seen, down the pub or in their own social circle. Six degrees of separation becomes a real thing when it's data that shouldn't have been shared.

TheBestThingthatAlmostHappened · 23/02/2026 16:38

40YearOldDad · 23/02/2026 16:27

What would your choice be between a one-to-one with a Dr or a DR and her partner?

Come on now, be honest. If it's not the first, I'm sure you'd be happy to screenshot your medical records and post them here, since it's not an issue, or just share a few work-related emails involving another person? My guess is that you'd not be happy to do that, and I'd not either. It'd probably lead to you getting the sack, depending on your job.

Mishandling sensitive, confidential information has sent people to their graves, but it's okay; my complaint was resolved.

It's the same argument over and over again: you can't pick and choose which parts of a policy we want to uphold.

I know this is a far cry from the initial question about WFH, but it shows that many people just aren't suited to it and are willing to die on the hill to prove a point.

And this is from someone who works from home, hotel rooms, coffee shops across the UK, would I ever conduct a work call in a coffee shop- not a cat in hell's chance - would I do while driving down the motorway on my own?- yep.

Before WFH did you attend the customer service surgery and wait your turn for your confidential 10 minute 1-2-1 appointment? Because if you didn't, you have no basis whatsoever to likening a customer service agent working from home instead of in a large open-plan office to a GP.

Newyearawaits · 23/02/2026 16:35

JHound · 23/02/2026 16:30

I will never take a job that requires me to be in the office for 5 days a week unless it pays significantly above market.

People who get bitter about others who are able to wfh are really pathetic.

I wouldn't consider myself to be bitter or pathetic. I am in tune with the number of people I know who are 'WFH' and abusing their position

Boomer55 · 23/02/2026 16:33

AgnesMcDoo · 22/02/2026 11:17

The people who bitch about it are envious.

I will never return to working in an office again

wfh has enabled me to get a very well paid senior role that would have previously required me to relocate to London.

it’s a geographic equaliser

Edited

I think some thst moan are fed up with trying to get through to organisations/government depts that rarely answer their phones, and when they do, tell us thst they haven’t got full access to files until they contact their office.🤷‍♀️

JHound · 23/02/2026 16:32

BettyBoh · 23/02/2026 16:18

I have WFH 100% since 2017. Moved to a new job in 2023 also 100% WFH. Until recently I would’ve have 100% supported it….
then I had something happen which got out of control. You could argue company culture is the reason why it couldn’t be tackled.

i managed a team of 9 in a busy department. Most of my team were fantastic.

i had one guy who was never really comfortable being managed by a woman. But we got by. He had an old-fashioned attitude to his job (eg didn't trust excel formulas, he would still add up a row of numbers “just to check”). Getting him to embrace automated tasks was difficult, even when I told him it was to allow him more time to branch out more (which it did - our company was growing massively and he wanted to be part of that growth). I couldn’t keep track of how slow he was being as I couldn’t see him not trusting agreed process. He was lying about how long things were taking and overriding automation. He took on new work and became stressed because he couldn’t manage his time. He wouldn’t let go of the old ways, nor would he let go of the new responsibilities. He was overworked through his own stubbornness and mistrust of excel formulas!!

then things got really nasty. When he was angry he would call women in my team and scream and shout at them. Every time I pulled him up on it he denied it. My word against theirs. HR were useless. My boss was useless. He then claimed all the women collaborated to make up lies about him. I was furious. Still no support from HR. They said it could go either way…, he is relying on the ability to deny it every time and the women are all being shouted at, or the women are all lying in collaboration. HR said there was nothing they could do.

I was sure had we all sat in an office it would be completely impossible for him to continue this behaviour. He definitely had a problem with anger towards women. 121 teams calls were an easy way to continue to shout at women until they cried. I was trying to protect my team with no support from my boss or HR. It was a stressful time. i hated the fact we all WFH as he could bypass all behavioural norms. I was really stuck and I couldn’t believe he was getting away with it.
I mentioned it to a friend who said, next time he does it tell them to record it.

when he finally did it to me, my friends words popped into my head: I recorded him on my iPhone. His language was disgraceful. Swearing, sexiest slurs etc, Massive massive error. Without looking into the implications I reported it to HR thinking I had the key to solving this with the recording. I ended up sacked for recording someone without their consent.

…

Really? Immediate dismissal no warning? And what happened to him?

Newyearawaits · 23/02/2026 16:32

VioletBees · 22/02/2026 12:36

Its the people who purposefully dont work from home that spoil it.

My colleague agreed to have her granddaughter who is 2 stay over during one half term week last year. She didn’t awnser the phone once to the team shes working with during this week and refused to give her number to customers (and refuses a work mobile or to have her laptop hooked up to take voice calls). As such - the team in the office had to take an extra 20 enquiries or so because she did not pick up.

She came in and laughed about how she just jiggled her mouse and spent SO much LOVELY time with her granddaughter. It was a complete piss take.

Shit like this is why nobody trusts home working! Who could blame a boss for putting restrictions in place when things like this happen.

Exactly and there are many others doing similar. I have a friend who openly admits to moving the mouse.
I have many more examples

JHound · 23/02/2026 16:30

I will never take a job that requires me to be in the office for 5 days a week unless it pays significantly above market.

People who get bitter about others who are able to wfh are really pathetic.

YourFluentQuoter · 23/02/2026 16:28

40YearOldDad · 23/02/2026 15:58

You're missing the point. to (try and) prove a very, very weak argument. Ted, who sits next to me, is part of my business and is covered by my company's policies; they adhere to our company NDA's, ICO, GDPR, etc policies/guidlines. My insurance covers me if Ted goes on a bender. Much like a junior Dr would be in a hospital performing his/her job for that business, they have privileges, need to know information. Your partner does not.

As for cleaners, ours come in every day. She asks if I need my work area cleaned. We have a policy on which information is left out 'in view' in our office and which is locked away, whether paper or laptops. She works for us, so she has a legitimate reason to be in our office. She is bound by our company procedure.

The exact same if we have to use an outside contractor.

Exactly.

So the cleaner and the outside contractor have the same glimpse of a screen that a partner may have of a WFH individual.

So not much.

And okay, they wouldn't be bound to the same policies as a low paid employee or contractor.

But the low-paid employee or contractor would be much more likely to pass on information they glimpsed on a laptop if it was beneficial to do so because their job wasn't all that great and not invested in wanting to keep it, than a partner of an employee privy to confidential information who would be potentially risking their loved ones employment.

And that would only be if the sharing of the information was beneficial in some way to the person sharing it so they were actively looking for it/passing it on.