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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Family in 45m2 flat with 8m2 bedroom

59 replies

Putrid46 · 22/02/2026 08:29

The flat is mainly taken up by a large bathroom, longer hallway but small living room and bedroom which is classed as a single bedroom, only enough for a 3/4 bed.

I own it but moved out as it wasn't suitable for my partner and I. As he doesn't yet drive, it would've been almost 1h30 each way on public transport 5 days a week, and he often works long hours.

I told my family this and they scoffed and said it can't possibly be that long. My Mum has turned down jobs for being too far even though it'd be in a car and 2 or 3 times per week.

They said we should throw things away in order to fit into the flat. I explained we don't have things we want to throw away and some of it is expensive equipment we need for work etc. We'd also like to have a family soon, I know babies stay in the parents bedroom for a while but the flat would be even more cluttered.

We're not asking for a mansion, there's nothing wrong with wanting a larger one bed at the best or a 2 bed, my partner also doesn't want such a long commute and neither would I. I wish I had a supportive family, it's not up to them to dictate where we live and how we live. Am I being greedy here?

OP posts:
Putrid46 · 22/02/2026 08:36

Meadowfinch · 22/02/2026 08:34

So you own a flat but it is inconvenient. Why not sell it and buy somewhere else?

What does it have to do with your family?

I am planning to sell it. It doesn't have to do with them, I'm just wondering whether we are being unreasonable and does anyone else live in a home that big with 3?

OP posts:
Putrid46 · 22/02/2026 08:34

Sorry I'm just looking for opinions on whether anyway has made this situation work. Which im allowed to do. Anyway..

OP posts:
Meadowfinch · 22/02/2026 08:34

So you own a flat but it is inconvenient. Why not sell it and buy somewhere else?

What does it have to do with your family?

ifonlyitwasreal · 22/02/2026 08:34

But why do you care what they say?

Putrid46 · 22/02/2026 08:33

ifonlyitwasreal · 22/02/2026 08:33

Why are you even discussing it with them? I never discuss such things with my relatives or pay any heed to their unsolicited opinions. Really odd to care!

Sometimes these things come up in conversation, that's all.

OP posts:
ifonlyitwasreal · 22/02/2026 08:33

Why are you even discussing it with them? I never discuss such things with my relatives or pay any heed to their unsolicited opinions. Really odd to care!

Putrid46 · 22/02/2026 08:33

They think rather than selling mine why can't we just move back in.

OP posts:
Putrid46 · 22/02/2026 08:32

25mini7 · 22/02/2026 08:31

Where are you living now?

We've renting a temporary larger 1 bed flat and looking to buy a 2 bed somewhere if we can sell mine.

OP posts:
25mini7 · 22/02/2026 08:31

Where are you living now?