Page 2 | Vulgar Comment Has Really Icked Me

YourFlakyHam · 2026-02-21T16:31:28+00:00

Me and my partner were watching a youtube channel about a guy lives on a narrow boat. We've followed him for a few years and now he has a girlfriend,who he introduced to his viewers. His girlfriend had to leave for work and waved goodbye to the viewers. My partner said "Do you think she put out?" I was shocked and disgusted by his comment! I called him out it ,was really pissed off with him tbh. He laughed and said it was just an off the cuff joke. But now I feel like he's tainted the program,it's lovely and innocent and just nice to watch.I also feel like I've lost some respect towards him. The couple are in their late 50's and of course they would be in a,sexual relationship It was a very immature and vulgar comment I didn't expect it as he's never said anything like that before .It's just given me that ick feeing tbh and it was a few weeks ago. My partner isn't young .

TomatoSandwiches · 21/02/2026 19:18

People need to stop telling women they are overreacting or being OTT compared to what was said. Why do people luke to downplay how a woman feels about something her partner did, reeks of internalised mysogyny.

dapsnotplimsolls · 21/02/2026 19:16

Does he have 'laddy' mates? Maybe this is the kind of thing he'd say to them. Not sure why he said it to you, though!

Original poster

YourFlakyHam · 21/02/2026 19:09

ThiagoJones · 21/02/2026 19:08

Well you’re the one in a relationship with him!

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And?

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ThiagoJones · 21/02/2026 19:08

YourFlakyHam · 21/02/2026 19:01

This.
There is absolutely nothing to do with sex at all in any of his programs.
Why the f would you say "Did she put out"?
Not big ,not clever just like a silly teenager.
Oh,I called him out because why would you even think did she have sex with him before going off to work .
I've grown up in the 70/i0s and those types of comments need to stay there
I loathe vulgarity and he knows that .

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Well you’re the one in a relationship with him!

Original poster

YourFlakyHam · 21/02/2026 19:01

BillieWiper · 21/02/2026 18:54

He sounds a bit ridiculous saying that. Like why would you say 'do you think she has/just had sex'?! What's that got to do with anything? Unless there was conversation or something in the show that meant sex was part of the 'storyline'.

I would say if he's not usually saying such things, telling him he sounds moronic should hopefully nip it in the bud.

This.
There is absolutely nothing to do with sex at all in any of his programs.
Why the f would you say "Did she put out"?
Not big ,not clever just like a silly teenager.
Oh,I called him out because why would you even think did she have sex with him before going off to work .
I've grown up in the 70/i0s and those types of comments need to stay there
I loathe vulgarity and he knows that .

OP posts:

BillieWiper · 21/02/2026 18:54

He sounds a bit ridiculous saying that. Like why would you say 'do you think she has/just had sex'?! What's that got to do with anything? Unless there was conversation or something in the show that meant sex was part of the 'storyline'.

I would say if he's not usually saying such things, telling him he sounds moronic should hopefully nip it in the bud.

BeaRightThere · 21/02/2026 18:36

Tacohill · 21/02/2026 17:48

I would have likely joked back that she looked frustrated so he’s obviously not very good in that department.
I would be tempted to make a joke about DHs skills but that might be a step too far.

I too don’t like the phrase put out - women enjoy sex just as much, if not more, than men but we typically have much more on our plate and can struggle to find the energy.

However, if it upset you I would have just told him to grow up and then forgotten about it.
It was just a silly comment and so I don’t think you should judge him too harshly.

So if your husband made this exact comment you would, in retaliation, tell him he was bad in bed? And that seems reasonable to you and not a completely over the top reaction to a lame joke?

FlyingApple · 21/02/2026 18:28

I would be surprised if my DH said that, I think I'd also find it very weird of him.

TwistedWonder · 21/02/2026 18:26

YourFlakyHam · 21/02/2026 17:33

He's old school alpha male and I've called him out before about his comments .He really thought he was being funny and it did fall very flat

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Old school alpha male usually translates to misogynistic sexist pig headed knuckle dragging dinosaur who thinks a woman’s place is in the kitchen

NovemberMorn · 21/02/2026 18:05

He sounds about 12 years old...I bet he laughs his head off at fart jokes.

But honestly, your over reaction soumds a bit hysterical.... odd that one stupid remark can 'taint' a programme you previously enjoyed watching.

FuzzyWolf · 21/02/2026 18:03

I think it’s a crass comment and would have said as much. However, I do think your reaction was disproportionate to it.

DuckyLuck · 21/02/2026 17:58

I think you’re being a bit uptight. But if that’s how you usually are, he should know and not make such jokes.

PS5Gamer · 21/02/2026 17:54

YourFlakyHam · 21/02/2026 17:33

He's old school alpha male and I've called him out before about his comments .He really thought he was being funny and it did fall very flat

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That should’ve been enough to put you off in the first place!

Original poster

YourFlakyHam · 21/02/2026 17:49

Tacohill · 21/02/2026 17:48

I would have likely joked back that she looked frustrated so he’s obviously not very good in that department.
I would be tempted to make a joke about DHs skills but that might be a step too far.

I too don’t like the phrase put out - women enjoy sex just as much, if not more, than men but we typically have much more on our plate and can struggle to find the energy.

However, if it upset you I would have just told him to grow up and then forgotten about it.
It was just a silly comment and so I don’t think you should judge him too harshly.

Thanks for your kind words.

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Tacohill · 21/02/2026 17:48

I would have likely joked back that she looked frustrated so he’s obviously not very good in that department.
I would be tempted to make a joke about DHs skills but that might be a step too far.

I too don’t like the phrase put out - women enjoy sex just as much, if not more, than men but we typically have much more on our plate and can struggle to find the energy.

However, if it upset you I would have just told him to grow up and then forgotten about it.
It was just a silly comment and so I don’t think you should judge him too harshly.

pinkyredrose · 21/02/2026 17:47

YourFlakyHam · 21/02/2026 17:33

He's old school alpha male and I've called him out before about his comments .He really thought he was being funny and it did fall very flat

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In other words he's a sexist arsehole.

YourGreenCat · 21/02/2026 17:45

YourFlakyHam · 21/02/2026 17:30

This.
Why do men ruin so many things?
It is a lovely innocent program.Yes ,the smutty comment wasn't welcome.
I'm no prude but I'm sick of comments like that from men in general tbh .

but women are not allowed to think let alone make comments about sex? It's only men?
Why, because we have a vagina, we are all innocent and prude? Unless we are a Jezebel.

FFS do people still believe that crap in 2026?

MamaToABeautifulBoy · 21/02/2026 17:44

You both sound a little odd to be fair …

BeaRightThere · 21/02/2026 17:35

I think it's weird that you think the mention of sex ruined the programme. Sex is a normal healthy activity. Mentioning it hasn't tainted your programme and I think it's bizarre you think it has.

I wouldn't care at all about your partner's comment and certainly wouldn't get all dramatic over it.

Original poster

YourFlakyHam · 21/02/2026 17:33

OfficerChurlish · 21/02/2026 17:30

I'd raise an eyebrow at the way he phrased it. "Do you think they had sex?" is neutral, thought it certainly may be viewed as prurient, vulgar, none of one's business etc. under these circumstanced. "Do you think she put out?" suggests a transactional view of sex where the person "putting out" is giving up something to the other person rather than a mutually enjoyable activity or a least an equal exchange. If this took you completely by surprise, could he have been trying to poke fun at a particular person or type of person that WOULD say this, and the joke just fell flat?

I wouldn't let it ruin the programme if you like it, just perhaps watch it alone or ask your partner to keep his weird comment to himself.

He's old school alpha male and I've called him out before about his comments .He really thought he was being funny and it did fall very flat

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SunnyRedSnail · 21/02/2026 17:33

YourFlakyHam · 21/02/2026 17:30

This.
Why do men ruin so many things?
It is a lovely innocent program.Yes ,the smutty comment wasn't welcome.
I'm no prude but I'm sick of comments like that from men in general tbh .

The comment itself is odd rather than vulgar, but I'd be more concerned why a program about living on a narrow boat prompted your DH to think about sex?

I think I would have just rolled my eyes and asked if he fancied the woman if it made him think about sex!

OfficerChurlish · 21/02/2026 17:30

I'd raise an eyebrow at the way he phrased it. "Do you think they had sex?" is neutral, thought it certainly may be viewed as prurient, vulgar, none of one's business etc. under these circumstanced. "Do you think she put out?" suggests a transactional view of sex where the person "putting out" is giving up something to the other person rather than a mutually enjoyable activity or a least an equal exchange. If this took you completely by surprise, could he have been trying to poke fun at a particular person or type of person that WOULD say this, and the joke just fell flat?

I wouldn't let it ruin the programme if you like it, just perhaps watch it alone or ask your partner to keep his weird comment to himself.

Original poster

YourFlakyHam · 21/02/2026 17:30

This.
Why do men ruin so many things?
It is a lovely innocent program.Yes ,the smutty comment wasn't welcome.
I'm no prude but I'm sick of comments like that from men in general tbh .

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ginasevern · 21/02/2026 17:26

I don't think you're being dramatic or pearly clutchy OP. It's obviously a programme you've enjoyed watching with your partner and it gives you a feel good factor and a bit of innocence in this mad world. You thought he felt the same way, but now you you'll assume he's just thinking of smutty things. Men never fail to disappoint do they?

hazelnutvanillalatte · 21/02/2026 17:25

It would put me off because it's such a weird immature comment to make. Reminds me of my DS' toilet humour...just a weird thing for a normal adult to say.