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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think I've hit an age of looking back not forward?

153 replies

Setsquares · 21/02/2026 00:12

I'll be 50 years old next week.
Youngest DC will be leaving for university in September.
I'm in a full-time, stressful job, which will see me through to retirement in 14/15 years time. Will never be a high earner (teacher).
DH and I bumble along well enough together. Certainly not exciting, but not awful.
Elderly parents.

My looks have faded - frown lines, greying hair, tired eyes, bit of extra weight on the hips.

Becoming more cynical about the world and humanity in general.

AIBU to think that my life now is about looking back on the good times (I had a great time in my 20s, in a big city and did lots of travelling, and then the kids' pre-school years were probably the happiest of my life), rather than expecting the same level of 'adventure' ahead?

OP posts:
CatherinedeBourgh · 21/02/2026 00:20

I'm 54 and I feel I have loads to look forward to! I work with my dc which I absolutely love doing, and am looking forward to seeing them develop professionally, looking forward to meeting their long-term partners when they have them and hopefully their children one day. And looking forward to more time with dh when we are less busy.

AplineDaisies · 21/02/2026 00:17

I only can say you need to get out of the mindset you are in because it's not positive and it's not going to help you. Surely with your youngest at uni,though you will have an empty nest, there will be more opportunities to explore without thinking about what dc are needing for tea etc?
You are only 50!
Take some time to write out dreams 💕

Smidge001 · 21/02/2026 00:16

I think it comes to a lot of us. You'll get loads of smug people coming to tell you how they've never felt better, got freedoms and life experience and loads of stuff to look forward to, but i swear there are more of us who had a great time in their 20s and 30s and now at a stage where everything's just 'fine'.