To think that it IS inconsistent to judge men who buy sex but not women who sell it (excluding women who are trafficked/traumatised/acting from financial necessity)?

I see what you mean...I certainly instinctively judge someone buying sex more, even though I don't think choosing to sell is good either (though I know most don't have a choice).

Otoh how would you feel if Bonnie Blue were a man? Would you feel different? That they were less vulnerable? I suppose women's physical vulnerability is an angle here too.

MOST women who sell sex do NOT have a choice.

I am NOT disputing that.

But a minority are different.

That post I quoted : 'I have no regrets - I travelled the world when young, own my house and have funded further studies for my current career. So it has been life changing in many ways'

• that doesn't sound like someone providing it because they have to make money. It sounds like someone at uni making a decision to do that to improve their future life. The majority of people who want to do further studies, travel etc do not sell sex- there IS a choice.

It's notable that there's a long and sad history of (some) gay men exploiting men selling sex. There's a much smaller amount of women who have paid for sex from men, or lesbians who've paid for sex from women, though all those things have & do exist to some extent.

Maybe it's not only about men objectifying women due to misogyny (although that is a big part of it), but male sexuality tending to be more objectifying no matter who it's directed at?

Either way it's very sad...

I don't think morally equivalent...this might be me being inconsistent but I think buying someone's sexual services (whatever the sexes involved) is worse intrinsically, but it's hard to articulate..

Otoh I think choosing to sell sex to get luxuries is a bad & harmful decision for the reasons I outlined in OP...

I see what you mean, but otoh Bonnie Blue seems to be doing exactly what she wants. Do you thunk she's doing it out of 'sexual vulnerability '?

I do agree partly re women's vulnerability but otoh that doesn't mean they have no choice ever. Clearly Bonnie Blue does.

Men being dogs doesn't force Bonnie Blue & her ilk to sell sex, does it? This feels almost...infantilising? I know you don't mean it that way & I agree re vulnerability but otoh women like Bonnie Blue have agency, they aren't being forced to sell sex to satisfy gross men. (Of course that is not the majority, as I've said)

I know that! Many, maybe most, men who sell sex are trafficked too, or do it out of poverty. I'm not talking about the majority.

I'll link to the thread I meant. If you read the OP's post, she seems to be an example of someone who freely chose it, and doesn't seem bothered by the damage. I have come across other examples. Eg. She says she knew many of the clients were married and doesn't seem very bothered by that.

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/5492966-to-tell-friend-her-new-partner-was-a-former-client-of-mine?page=2&reply=150628349

I don't approve of men choosing to sell sex either.

I don't think women or men should be banned from selling it though, I support the Nordic Model.

True. But they do exist.

To give that thread as an example, the OP said she had been a Domme (which I think often tends to not involve much physical contact). She said she used it to fund travel, a house & a second degree. It didn't sound like she had to do it out of poverty or coercion.
Several pps defended her choice by saying no woman in the sex industry really chooses it and so they can't be blamed for participating in the system, and that the men are bad so they're entitled to take their money.