AIBU to be confused: some couples don’t share a bed/room with their when they have a new baby?

Who am I criticizing? And where did I say how wonderful I was either I think you are imagining stuff

As for advice being outdated well most likely as DD is 35 soon. What's the worst that could happen with a beaker? What's so dangerous? Water spillage. Think practical not neurotics lol

Am I only only a shit mum to the one I breastfed for 3 months but ok mum to the others I breastfed longer? Made no difference to their lives.

BTW.... no idea what you're blabbering on about interaction and wakefulness because nobody has mentioned that. You've just randomly brought it up.

Yes... it's called parenting

You're on here criticising people who are talking about breastfed babies wake habits and hiw wonderful you are when you clearly didn't breast feed so why the nasty comments? Also, FYI throwing a beaker in with a 6 month.old isn't recommended. You're advice is outdated and dangerous.

One she wasnt breasted and 2 I didn't feed it to her At 6 months she was perfectly capable of drinking from the beaker of water I left in the cot.

Or was I meant to be up ALL night with her feeding, interaction and encouraging wakefulness AND working all day as well?

But you didn't allow your child to self settle you fed them water (which isn't recommended for BF babies u1 overnight bte).

Ok regularly wake in the night and need feeding and nappy changing then. Rather than being allowed to self settle. Better for you ...

I slept in the same room as my baby son during the week as my DH had to go to work and nobody makes allowances for tired dads in the workplace.

At weekends we slept in the same room. Once I went back to work baby was old enough to sleep in a room by himself anyway,

And yet you’re claiming babies regularly “wake in the night these days” as though babies didn’t always wake through the night, which is just clearly rubbish.

No I never said they didn't wake Simply as they only got water if they did. Certainly not going to encourage it

. And not all babies are in another room. My eldest was nearly 2 by the time she got her own room as I lived in a one bed flat. Couldnt be done bothering to sell it when she was very young and I worked full time then the purchase on another fell through twice

A friend's daughter is in a 1 bed with 3 kids ( now in 2026) so none of them we " shut away in a room"

And I remember brother having a baby monitor. He was born in 1979. So quite a few bloody decades ago u must be talking,

My son's nappy would leak if I didn't have a size up overnight nappy on him, but he was prone to massive wees and had a chunky bum.

Re: night feeds, I rather suspect the "no feeds in the night" thing was the alteration of natural behaviour rather than night feeds being unnatural. I don't have the slide from our antenatal class, but it was comparing night feeds across species to show that it was normal for humans and other apes to night feed.

And re boob size, I imagine there's definitely an optimal size. I guess small boobs you need to budge really close and might squish them in a side feed, and with my XL variety I always had to hold it for him. But not when he was older.

Nonsense, babies decades ago still woke and their parents didn’t hear them because they were in another room, often with the door shut and no monitor.

You’re simultaneously saying your baby never woke at 7 months but also that you fed it water in the night.

Maybe not 2 weeks but certainly not 7 months unless there was a poo. No need to disturb child more than necessary and nappies are very good these days.

Wonder why 7 month olds are regularly away at night these days? I have one who was a pita to go to bed. But it seems people are regularly feeding 7 month olds in night now. Strange how the biology has changed. Or are they waking more as ina room with parents?

We only gave water in night by 7 months Kids didn't starve.

I don't think she's in the minority. I've never heard anyone who has needed to change nappies past 5/6 weeks overnight.

I just fed lying down on my side so didn't need to be fully awake once they latch themselves on.

There must be an optimum size then. Mine weren't.

Two babies are a different ball game.

Not sure what you mean, surely big boobs would be a smother risk 🤔

I had twins. Can’t imagine doing that.

Only if your boobs are big enough. Mine weren't. I would have smothered DD if I had done that. I did try but it didn't work.

Never heard of anyone changing nappies in the night 😂Most babies stop pooping at night by 6 weeks.

You’re in the absolute minority if the only time you changed a nappy during the night is up to two weeks.

No one changes a nappy at night at 7+ months? That's like the first 6 weeks max. More like 2 weeks for mine.

Isn't the main benefit of breastfeeding that you can snooze through the night feeds?

At 7/8/9/10 months DH would do the first few wakes regardless to settle and I would feed after 3 hours and if signing milk (baby signing was amazing both signing regularly by 6 months).

So we both got rest.

Of course if they were ill and just wanting boob then it would be me but typically we would co-sleep when this happened.

BF doesn't mean it all needs to be on mum including in the night there are ways that partners and husbands can and do help out.

Goodness me. You must be a deep sleeper.