At my wits end with oversharing colleague

MY bestie has never shared anything about her sex life with me, thank god. I assume she and her bloke have sex, but she doesn't TELL me about it!

Do people really not know that this a thing?

There was a whole episode of Sex & The City about it c.25 years ago. This isn’t something new or outlandish.

Good to read OP that her manager has acted, let us hope that puts an end to the harassing comments that your colleague has made.

They call it "eating each other out" 🤢

You need to be very firm with your boundaries, interrupt her, 'can you please not discuss your personal life in the office' then keep repeating it.

If she ignores you, report to your manager.

Can you not just say “Fuck’s sake Colleague - who the hell wants to hear this”

Ewwwww! Next time, stick your fingers in your ears and chant loudly “ la la la la “

Its seems so . More prevalent among the gay community, my gay friend told me

If you don't want to speak to her directly, speak to her manager. That's inappropriate in the workplace.

Does she not have any friends outside of the office to talk to?

Do people really lick each others bumholes??

Yes far too much i would tell her that if he kisses her after shes likely to get very ill from ecoli!

This is on your manager to deal with. It could definitely be classed as sexual harassment and employers now have a duty to prevent sexual harassment in the workplace. Talk to your line manager and encourage others to do the same.

God is your colleague my mother???

I had a complete stranger, some old lady, come up to me in public and out on nowhere to my face judge my financial choices, medical decisions and my relationship troubles!

My dad said as a kid we had people gossip and make fun of us where we lived and church we went to and how one couple literally pulled him away and said you have got to shut her up! Every single time tiny thing that goes in your home she runs and tells people! It’s embrassing your family,

I saw her Facebook messages once. It was those people who live abroad who we met on holiday, who we talk to once a year and we exchange Christmas wishes once a year with. Long Paragraphs and paragraphs and paragraphs, of how her husband cheated on her, child he fathered and nasty dirty details of the affair and fights they had during their marriage. The people didn’t reply, imagine getting message out of nowhere from people you barely know like this one day. Ridiculous

last straw was when last time she went around telling people I never even met and people she not even close with (woman she recently met in her French class) at how much money I have in the bank, investments and my safe at home!!!!!! And jewellery. And That I’m worried about going on a trip out of town as ive been having trouble with my home security system

like wtf!!!!!!!

imo it’s got to be some kind of mental problem. It is not normal.

YABU to wait until the next time - just have a quiet word with her now. And not in the heat of the moment next time (when there may be your other colleagues around)

That’s massively inappropriate to discuss in the office. I’d speak to your manager, or maybe to her directly if you are brave enough. I can’t believe someone would share that detail in a workplace. If I heard one of my team discussing that, they’d be pulled in for a chat.

Good, hope it works!

Edited as I can see you've reported her. Good job OP

Pleased to read this as this would absolutely be sexual harassment in my workplace - its so inappropriate to force other people to sit through talk about sex life/kinks and it's really not surprising that you found it upsetting and uncomfortable. Well done for saying something to your manager, you did the right thing. Even if its not as clear cut sexual harassment in your place of work, some social pressures (e.g. what topics are appropriate for the workplace) exist for a reason

How has she taken the talking to?

If she carries on I would absolutely go the formal complaint route

She’s possibly neurodivergent. I’ve come across this lack of awareness before, it’s very difficult to navigate as some people just don’t understand boundaries.

You have to be blunt with her, so she absolutely understands how inappropriate she’s being. Whilst everyone just accepts it, she doesn’t realise.

Follow up what the manager has said, with blunt refusal to listen.

Had a colleague like this. And she was in her 50s 🤢 Telling us all the sordid details. I would be absolutely ashamed and embarrassed. Thinking back I think she had mh issues. She was constantly talking about herself and how fantastic she was. Didn't seem to live in the real world.

I'm green at the gills.

Saw your update👍

I'll stop you right there tmi and remember we're in work.

I would leave a very formal typed note on ther keyboard stating that her colleagues as a group found her accounts inappropriate and unprofessional. If they continue she would be reported to management for inductrial misconduct. I would be seen to leave the building and then sneak back and deposit the note she she cannot possibly know who left it.