Strange situation on the train with parent

That is vile and such bad manners the sound of people eating gets me very angry.

I'm NOT saying the child had additional support needs but IF he does, his dad is probably hardened to others' judgement...to the point of antagonism.

Of course, he might just be an antagonistic arsehole.

Try to forget about it. Who knows what it is that you encountered.

The OP said she may have looked a second too long - I was likening the man's response to my own inner feelings when the women at school looked disapprovingly at my DGD. I didn't shove cheese into her mouth, that would have been anti-social, but I certainly felt like it!

People can be super-sensitive if they think their child is being judged.

I hate seeing anyone eating with their mouth wide open as much as the next person.

Yeah. And?
If he is modelling that sort of crass behaviour to his son, then he needs to get used to it.

I would correct my child in public if they were doing something anti social which includes eating like the way OP described.

Wanker dad bringing up child. I wonder how the child will turn out......

You did nothing wrong.

The child was probably showing off and the father was encouraging him. Good luck with the child when he's a teenager.

One of the joys of public transport!
Boy may have SEN issues, but dad definitely sounds very passive aggressive. I would have moved if at all possible...

An apology for what? Nobody knows why the child was eating like that, or what look was on the OP's face when she was staring at him, or why the Father reacted the way that he did.

I mean, that's the ideal solution, but how likely do you think that is to happen? If he was the sort to do that, this situation wouldn't have happened in the first place.

Eh? That's a completely different and not anti-social behaviour.

The man was a dick.

When my DGD was in primary school, aged around nine I think, I went to an event in her classroom where parents/grans were taking part in activities sitting around communal tables. One activity involved tasting cheese and cubes of bread and slicing tomatoes etc.

DGD was overweight by anyone's observation - as the plates were being handed round to taste some children did/did not take a morsel but DGD partook each time. There was one adult who more than once glanced across the table in disapproval - I could see what she was thinking. I was tempted to stuff a big chunk of cheddar into her miserable gob I was so incensed!

As an aside, said granddaughter is now a tall slim 16 year-old who is arriving this afternoon for a couple of days 😊

Or perhaps, the father of this ill mannered little boy could correct his son’s behaviour and offer an apology? As opposed to his childish display of twatishness?

Sadly, every woman reading this thread will have felt intimidated (or worse) by a man in public and then be made to feel like it’s her fault.

Don’t fall for that misogynistic bullshit. If you were a big burly bloke he probably would have asked his kid to be less noisy, but because you’re a woman he got off on intimidation and it probably gave him a little thrill.

This is a man problem, not a you problem.

And I’ll bet he calls himself a “good man” too and says “not all men”, when all these mini acts of micro aggression being deemed socially acceptable is what makes the much bigger acts of aggression feel acceptable to the men making them.

I suppose its not a bad thing that a Reform voter has worked out how to use public transport. But, poor child. He's a misogynist bully. Best ignore.

The only behaviour you can control is your own, male or female. The OP can’t prevent the child from chewing sweets with his mouth open, or his father from copying him, having noticed her obvious disgust. She’s just doubled the amount of gross mashed-up sweets she’s looking at.

Was he doing it to make you uncomfortable or to support his child? Surely a 12yo eating like that has some SN and as his parent you're probably often offended on his behalf by all the people who "look" for a moment too long.

If he was doing it to make you uncomfortable, he was making a point about you being rude/judgemental.

I'm not saying he handled it well, but you'd support that kind of petty response from mothers wanting to support their child with SN.

Like father, like son! 😂

This would have made me feel uncomfortable too OP.

Id like to think I’d have asked for a sweet and down it back to them! Of course I wouldn’t, I’d have just sat there and seethed.

What hope is there for this boy to learn good manners!

Yes.... because she's the problem.

Not the childs lack of consideration and bad manners...
Not that's mans dickhead response...

No the real villain in this story is the woman who looked at someone who was inconsiderately disturbing others for a fraction of a second too long.

She should suppress control and minimise herself...I would say be seen but not heard but she didnt even speak!😅... and every other (male) fucker can do whatever they like?

That's what you think????

Yeah put all the emphasis on the woman in the situation to minimise and restrict her behaviour, but not the other way around. 🙄

It doesn’t sound like the boy was doing it on purpose but obviously the dad was aware that you were watching hence his reaction. Maybe hes fed up on his child being judged for something he can’t help. No one knows for sure.

It is horrible behaviour especially from the man, but staring at someone for even a ‘second longer’ is quite a long time in that context, suggesting you were looking at him for a few seconds.
The adult was highly unlikely to correct the child just because a random person was looking and if you’re honest you were looking and judging.
Situations like that I’d deliberately look away and distract myself. Some people get off on exhibiting anti social behaviour I wouldn’t pay it any attention or show it bothered me. Some want the attention.

You could look at it that he was defensive of his son, which is a positive but he was definitely trying to intimidate you. I would’ve hated this. Ugh. Why do people (especially men) have to behave like twats? No decorum any more.