To not invite my son?

I think he did it simply because it's what he wanted to do. He didn't give your son a second thought because he didn't want to. He wasn't concerned about your son being upset either by staying over in your house. That would concern me personally, especially as your son is fond of them. I would feel protective over my son

Try reading the OP again, @MCF86. Because you have completely missed the point.

I would tell DP they are NOT staying at your house the night before. Who does he think he is, arranging that without asking g you first? If he had done do, you could have asked for a ticket for your son, too.
I would consider this to be a big red flag and rethink this relationship.

Did you actually invite them all to stay or has he just decided that is what’s happening? Seems incredibly inconsiderate on your DP’s part. I’d be telling him to find somewhere else to stay rather than let him rub your son’s nose in it.

Did he ask if they could stay or does he take it for granted Op because it's your home, not his. Does he contribute to your household financially or is he an unpaid guest four days a week? I ask because you don't sound much like a blended family to me if he didn't think to invite your DS

Do you invite his son every time you take your son out somewhere?

Your partner is making an effort to get his dad and son together. I don't see why that's hard to get your head round!

It would be a no to staying at mine if I were you. Tell him it's not working for you since son is not invited and tell them to enjoy the game.

Does his son have a bed at your house and is he expecting you to make this/change it? He is bang out of order using your house as a hotel for his convenience and the ‘crazy’ comment is the constant term I read on here when men tell their next partner why they split up with their previous one. I absolutely would tell him to stay elsewhere and have a think about why he’s excluded your ds.

I think it’s fine for him to go to football with his son and dad

but he should have asked if for him and son to stay at yours

assume his first time

They can go to the football together but they don’t need to be staying at your house. You aren’t a hotel.

Prioritise your son and tell your partner that he and his son cannot stay that night as you do not want your son upset at being left out.

Do not back down, say no to him staying over. He didn't even ask you, the fucker just assumed he could stay, and expects you to feed them too I bet.

Not unreasonable AT ALL to want to do a trip with just his son, however it is a bit cheeky to TELL you he and son are staying over the night before for convenience. That’s what I would push back on, that he’s in a way included you in these plans for his comfort & it would have really been nice manners to have asked, not assumed, and to have considered that it may at that point been nice to extend the offer to you and your son.

Does he make a financial contribution for the four days a week spent in your house? Also, he spends two days a week with your son and three alone with his. You are splitting your time with your son with him and his son has his undivided attention during his days.

This, it's fine for him to have one to one time with his son and his dad but it's not on that he can just assume that he can use your home as a base.

This. I‘d feel a bit used: good enough to provide a place to stay but not good enough to make an effort for my child.

If he wanted to do something with his child on their own, then he should have stayed at his home and not imposed on you. Couldn’t he have stayed with his Dad?

I would have expected your partner to ask if your DS wanted to join. Just out of courtesy.

Take your son out that day and do something he loves - just the two of you. Your partner sounds careless and I‘d watch him from now on. If he can’t make an effort with your child and you then you’re better off without him.

It sounds like the issue is mainly them staying at yours so just tell them that doesn't work for you.

But also this!

I said neither are unreasonable but that’s based off my own experience of trying to rationalise the same situation to my 8 year-old.
Her “Step-Mum” has a daughter a year older than my daughter and she takes her to get her nails done while my daughter is at her house. My daughter begs to go, I said yes to the Step-Mum but for half term only though, they went on Saturday and didn’t take my daughter. She cried.
Me and my partner have to pick up the pieces and we hate the Step-Mum for many reasons, my daughter’s Dad is pathetic and “stays out of it to keep the peace”.

So yeah, actually, your partner’s a dick for not inviting your son and then also telling you they’ll be staying at yours after.

I think it's fine for him to go to the football with his dad and son, he may want to build some bridges and that's ok.

It's bloody cheeky of him to invite himself back to your house to stay afterwards. If he wants bonding time with his son he needs to go elsewhere. Coming back to yours after a great day out your son's not been invited to is not on. It may cause your son upset. DP is not wrong to go but he's wrong to flaunt it, that would be the thing upsetting me tbh.

It's the staying over at yours and essentially using your home as a hotel and rubbing the trip in your son's face that I have a problem with. If he takes his son that's fine, father son trip. But to use your home because it's more convenient is not ok.

You need to be all happy and breezy about him going with his son. Great father son time etc.

But also tell him, 'Go from yours please. I don't want yoursonsname getting upset that he wasn't invited. We'll see you Thursday instead. Have a fab time!.'

I don’t think either of you are being unreasonable, this is just one of those shit situations in blended families.
You aren’t unreasonable to be upset that he hasn’t asked your son to go.
He isn’t unreasonable to want a “three generations” day out (some adults still yearn for that connection with their distant parent).

The only thing utterly taking the piss is your partner telling you they’re staying at your house after because it’s closer.
Since when is your house/your family for convenience only?

So, is the GF coming to yours too or meeting them there? It's a bit cheeky to be staying at yours to do something you and your son are excluded from unless he asked you (not just told!) first. If you lived together full time that would be different.

I would see him inviting his dad as a huge plus maybe trying to improve his relationship. There is no reason why his son can't get some alone time with him in a shared hobby - they just need to go from his house if it bothers you. I am guessing your son has alone time with his own dad.

This.
all these posters tripping up over themselves to say that this is completely normal when in the real world, of course you’d expect an invite for your son when the kids are close in age and they will be staying at your house that night.

I think he’s being unreasonable. He gets plenty of me-time with just his son. It’s really rubbing it in to stay at your house and for your son to see them going off to the match together. It’s a bonding activity for them and your son is left out. Does his dad ever take him? Maybe that would be the solution. Could it become a regular thing? I’d set some boundaries before it becomes a regular situation excluding your son.