Pros and cons of living in the countryside

LOL, country kids do way more 'hanging on out street corners' (or down the back field, or in the graveyard, or at the one village bus shelter) than urban ones as there isn't anything else to do!

In a city your teen can join a wide range of interesting clubs on any day after school or choose from a big selection of leisure activities - in the countryside they can be nagged to walk the dog in the rain and then it is back indoors asap to screens (by which we mean swearing at the crappy broadband overloading again because more than one person is using it at once), or mooching around getting into trouble with friends outside to try to get some kind of excitement into life.

Also check how far you are from the local fire brigade and A&E.

I have just looked up the population of my village and it is 450!

On the subject of transporting teenagers, we just bit the bullet on that and felt it was a small price to pay for all the advantages of country living. The children knew that we (or another parent) would make sure they were not disadvantaged in getting to (and more importantly back from) the things they wanted to do. Or we would deliver them the couple of miles to a bus stop.

All my now adult DDs went to university in cities and could not wait to get back to the country.

Flies in summer, smell of manure, mud and more mud, Dcat bringing home many kills, poor public transport
Pros quiet, beautiful, sense of community, not over looked, watching the wildlife, low crime rate

Make friends with the farmers/landowners around your house, a lot of them won't mind you walking across their land, or the children playing in the fields as long as you are respectful and ask permission!

It doesn't sound like you are going to be that rural/isolated if it's only 15mins from your current house. Sounds like the perfect compromise!

Having done city living and now been in the countryside for around 10 years, I would never go back to urban life. I didn't realise how much the low level constant background noise of a twin was affecting me until we moved here. The difference that the gentle country sounds, open views, fresh air and spending so much more time outside with the children has made to mental health is enormous.

We have found people to very welcoming and friendly, we do more dinner parties at friend's houses and pub drinks/lunches, no need to go into town at all really now. Yes there's a bit of ferrying around but I find driving on country rounds so much more enjoyable than stuck in gridlock, fumes and traffic lights.

The main difference that I live is being completely in tune with and aware of the seasons. In the city, they all blended into one sort of...in the country you notice the first leaves and snowdrops in spring, yes there's relentless mud in winter (if you can have a boot room in your house to put muddy shoes/wash the dog!) it is worth it's weight in gold in winter!

My children have honestly had an idyllic childhood living here. Sooo much more freedom and independence than they could ever have had in the city. They open the door and go and roam the fields with their friends from neighbouring farms and villages with the dogs, building dens, climbing trees, getting lost(!), having adventures, helping out on farms with lambing with no parental supervision. It's an Enid Blyton childhood as a PP said, that is either up your street or not!

Just keep your freezer well stocked as there's definitely no takeaways round here! Although most village pubs you can ring up and order some food to collect so kinda the same, and probably healthier?!

Country outweighs city for me every time - no contest.

• big skies and beautiful views that feed the soul. I have some mobility problems so these are precious assets.
• Quiet - the loudest sounds are the cows farting in the field behind my house. You can go for a walk with a friend and hear each other speak.
• The birdsong - a total joy
• The sense of community - people know each other and get together to create social activities in the village hall: films, coffee mornings, fund-raising activities, choirs, musical performances, heritage group, yoga, exercise etc. etc. You could be out at something every day of the week ...
• The small local primary school is part of the community and members of the community are all invited to share in their activities and performances, so the children feel the support of everyone around them. Forest school for them takes in a literal meaning as they learn in the woods around the school. Much of their learning takes place outside.
• And, following on from that, the support of others - for instance I needed to get to the surgery the other day while feeling unwell. a quick post on the village whatsapp and there were 3 offers of a lift.
• the absence of pollution - the air is clear and smells fresh and clean.

There are of course what some might see as disadvantages:

• no public transport - you will need a car!
• surgery a long distance away
• no shops

You do get used to these things - I can get to a small shop/PO 3 miles away and have all my groceries delivered. The nearest city - 16 miles - has theatre, shopping centre etc. and train station for trips further afield. I do not think I miss out in any way. And I arrange coach trips to concerts for local people.

Just for your interest OP, I brought up 3 now adult DDs in the country. They have all chosen to stay in villages now they have their own families because they could see what it gave them. One had to travel a very long way to secondary school - up at 7am to get the school bus to the city, walk across town to get another bus - and all repeated on the way back. The first time she did it I was concerned as to how she might cope at age 11 - this is what she said ... "Oh Mum, it is beautiful! We went over the hill as the sun was coming up and watched the sun starting to go down on the way back." She continued to love it throughout her school days and is now a keen hill walker.
The Young Farmers' Club is interesting - two of my DDs met their future husbands there!
The view from my window every morning is the joy that keeps me going!

@sharkstaleyeah I think it’s just being really selective about where you go, my experience was not positive growing up, that said I know there are beautiful villages with countryside walks and not far from towns and with bus links etc, it’s just being careful where you go.

@MsJinksthis is the thing, I grew up in one of the most beautiful places in the country, green hills for miles. But actually the countryside wasn’t very accessible in a lot of places, it was either privately owned and/or challenging terrain, despite living literally in the middle of nowhere we still needed to drive somewhere to park somewhere officially and have somewhere we had right to roam (and the marked footpaths etc). And I do that now I live in a town, I can be at a beautiful national park in less than a 10 minute drive and still have all the perks of town living.

I drove out yesterday to a small town in Yorkshire, through lots of countryside and also a small, lovely village and the odd solo house a distance from any other. Rural though not the back of beyond.
After reading this thread I was looking for where you could walk in this countryside, and realised it would either be along the very fast road I was on with very intermittent paths, or up one public pathway (I think - I didn’t stop to check the sign) accessible by the fast road. The green off the road was all farming land (that’s fine of course) and I didn’t see anyone walking at all. Such a shame you have the views and peace, but are more or less trapped in place without a car.
I know not all countryside will be the same but it is something I’d not thought of much before - my previous village didn’t even benefit from lovely views.
I remain happy in my city with plenty of walks, green, water in walking distance but that’s personal preference of course.

The teen boredom and constant driving is the main negative. The other is fear of car crashes. At my rural comp each school year lost 1 or 2 pupils in car crashes. New drivers alcohol and country lanes is a deadly combination. Remember clinging to my friend in fear in the back seat being driven home by a drunk lad. My teens after a night out can walk home get a bus or hop in a £7 uber. They’ve learnt to drive but rarely bother

I used to be 1hr from nearest A&E... It's more a frustration than a significant risk. There's generally a stronger network of medics (GP and local nurses) and volunteers when you get properly rural.

This in spades, unbelievably naive, drugs were far more present as an issue in my rural area I grew up in than the market town I am in now. Boredom and employment strains will do that to people! A heck of lot less police too.

If it means teens cannot be independent DO NOT DO IT. You can live close to the countryside without alienating them.

I grew up in a very small town in a rural area. Lots of pros as already listed above, mainly access to the outdoors, peace and quiet, community feel etc.

Biggest cons are definitely transport, public transport was very limited where I lived, so if you didn't drive/ have a car you were pretty stuck with nothing to do or reliant on other people. My parents were constantly driving me to places when I was a teenager and before I could drive. There's very little for teenagers to do. When I used to come home from uni and didn't have a car I felt completely trapped.

Logistically, everything requires more planning, the lack of access to a range of shops is annoying, if you forget anything from your weekly shop it might be a 20 mile round trip to get it. The biggest con those is many rural areas have very poor access to hospitals and healthcare facilities, which ultimately, led to my parents moving back to a city again once they were older and had health issues.

I definitely miss it though, but on balance, wouldn't want to live in a rural area again. Currently living in a nice suburb very close to open countryside, but with two cities in easy reach, which gives the best of both worlds.

Having lived in the country for a while the big con, the huge one, the overwhelming downside, I'd say, is not living in a city.

N RTFT but my friend lives rurally and has often had this conversation with me (she's in a hamlet near the coast) because I often dream of moving somewhere more remote.

She wants to move eventually even though she loves it as her health is in decline and the nearest hospital is so far away, she's afraid if she had a health scare she'd be dead by the time any emergency service got to her/got her to the hospital.

Also-no dentist for miles around
When the weather is bad there's nothing to really do. She's quite an outdoorsy person and gets quite depressed in winter.
She notes that within her hamlet it seems that every teen is smoking drugs. They're bored and there aren't any jobs for them.

But, it sounds as if you won't be quite as isolated so these things may not happen for you?

I feel I have the best of both worlds really. I am in a village with very much a 'village life' feel, local pub, church, neighbourly relations with everyone, local woods, duck pond and farmland.

BUT, 15 minutes and you're in a big city. An hour and you're in beautiful countryside. My friend's account of rural living has put me off!

We live next door to our village's drug dealers! They are perfectly lovely to us but clearly have a thriving business.

Anyone who thinks rural areas don’t have drug problems is naive.

I absolutely agree that rural living does not mean lack of resilience. Ds was catching the bus with friends to go camping etc at 16, he was working at 15. At 17 and driving he was travelling across the Uk for sport and holidays, at 18 he went to live and work in New Zealand. Although we are rural we do leave and visit cities etc, dc are exposed to the world outside. Yes you have to drive them but if you live rurally many of their friends do to so they are all in the same boat.

I just don't think it's as straightforward as city = good and rural = bad for teens.

I'd add to that and say that I don't think city v rural living is the decisive factor in whether teens grow up to become independent/resilient.

Yes, we didn't have much public transport where I lived. But as a teenager my parents could drive me to the bus stop 4 miles away where I'd meet a friend and we'd catch a bus 50 miles to go to a big shopping centre. That's plenty of independence for a 13 year old imo. Friends with anxious parents who lived in a town were much more restricted and didn't learn how to deal with anything themselves. It wasn't a rural/town divide.

@TheNinkyNonkyIsATardis but as a teenager she's still going to want to go into the city, explore and go out with her friends - rural living isn't a cushion from all that, it just means that she'll be overly reliant on mum/dad and less able to navigate things should they come up when she's even older and on her own.

I did say street smart is good and bad for me it means:
Not being thrown when the train is cancelled/late but being able navigate buses or another route
Knowing when trouble is about to kick off and how to avoid it.
Sounds ridiculous but how to cross a busy road in stationary traffic on foot.
How to minimise your chances of getting pickpocketed or mugged.

These things probably do imply being exposed to drugs, alcohol and low level criminal activity between 14-18 but I would suggest being better able to handle situations when they arise as a young adult living away from home.

It probably depends very much on what sort of rural we're talking.

The area I grew up in was a national park, with extensive public transport, lots of job opportunities and also a small semblance of nightlife for all the visitors to the area.

Very different to one of those villages which is five miles from the nearest village and fifteen miles from the nearest town, I suppose.

And from my perspective, "street smart" can be a bit of a misnomer for "lightly or seriously involved in drugs, smoking and risky sexual behaviour" - smart is knowing how to avoid the bad and enjoy the good, surely? My husband grew up in an urban area, and although straight laced, being mugged twice and walking into a murder scene en route to school wasn't in any way enriching.

I just don't think it's as straightforward as city = good and rural = bad for teens.