Would I be unreasonable to ask a child to be a bit quieter on their iPad in a restaurant?

They are entitled to this and avoid family restaurants, especially during school holidays

The OP specifically notes that it's not a restaurant marketed as a "family" restaurant. She is quite reasonable to expect a low level of patrons' conversations, not iPAD conversations at full pitch, including screaming.

Difficulty is that some people don't like any 'noise' or activity associated with children and interpret any child's behaviour as disruptive to their enjoyment . I have family members who have this view. They are entitled to this and avoid family restaurants, especially during school holidays

Exactly.
I don't want to "have children in my life", either.

Shit parenting.

I'd ask the staff if they could speak the family and tell the kid to shut up, or move you. Otherwise I'd leave.

No, I'm not that type. I'm not loud, nor are my DC. They have no interest in iPads so have never taken one to a restaurant. I don't get wound up about what people are doing around me though. I like seeing people enjoy themselves. I'm more a live and let live type, quite the opposite of the entitled type.

Yessss!

We all find it rude and annoying, and spoils civilised times in public spaces.

But we all worry too much about telling parents that they need to teach their children how to behave properly - "manners" are simply having consideration for others.

And the parents in @WouldYouLikeSomeRibena 's situation have no manners, and are raising children who are going to be rude & annoying, because they won't have been taught proper consideration of others in shared public space.

I have no problem with kids making noise per se (although if a child is screaming through a play or meal, take them out FFS). My children can be noisy.

But iPad or music on speaker is not the child making the noise and it is perfectly possible to avoid.

We never did screens in restaurants. Yes it was a massive pain in the arse entertaining them and getting them to sit still but they eventually got used to doing drawing and we'd carry little games or toys with us to entertain them.

I would definitely say something to the staff. Takes the heat off you and the staff need to know they need to tackle the behaviour.

You can tell the (handful of) bad parents on this thread happy to let their children run amok in restaurants and iPads on full past because, you know, kids will be kids and where would the human race be without children

Terrible parents.

Ask them to turn off the iPad or give their DD head phones.

If that doesn't work, ask for the manager, and ask him/her to be really clear with the noisy family.

I've got nothing against children being in restaurants. I've got a huge problem with it if they make noise or run around, however.

Speaking to the parents is just a risk you have to take. They might take it well, or they might stand up and challenge you. I'm going to go with the latter, if they're the sort of parents not to handle the noise and deal with the bad behaviour, then they don't care and will defend their perfect angels to the last.

Our front garden in London didn't have a gate (they all came like that) and parents would always let their kids run around in my garden, and this caused all sorts of damage, while they parked/paid the meter (a huge soft play centre was built right near our house, hence the constant invasion). I'd nicely go out and explain that it was private property, and oh my goodness the reaction of some of the parents. I was challenged to physical fights, had stuff thrown at my door and front windows, had half a burger thrown at me, was screamed at, told "how is it affecting you?" you name it. If they're the type to ignore bad behaviour, then they're usually nasty types.

You can certainly tell who the lazy, entitled parents are on this thread.

General noise from children is expected and acceptable, but a children playing around tables in a restaurant is dangerous, and listening to an iPad without headphones is not acceptable and shouldn’t be allowed to happen. Parents need to be a bit
more considerate sometimes to those around them, and make sure their children are not disturbing others or being dangerous. I say this as a parent of two young children, mine are allowed to play quietly at restaurants but they stay in their seats and if they watch an iPad they have headphones or sound off.

Me too. I’d tell the staff I had been hoping for a pleasant, civilised meal, but the noisy and uncontrolled behaviour of children has forced us to find somewhere else.

Ask the staff to make them turn down the iPad or ask if you can have another quieter table as the noise of the screens is triggering you.

According to your post you’re there right now, so why are you posting on here when out for a meal with your friend? Weird.

Never. If my child is really acting up and I have no headphones she gets papa pig on my phone with the sound off - which is not really an issue as I think she knows all episodes by heart anyway. Terrible parent, but not as bad as one who leaves the sound on!

YANBU - it is selfish inflicting noise on other people and it is the parents who are the problem for not making them turn the sound off.

I was in a hospital waiting room the other day, with 2 different people on gadgets with noise and it was horrendous.

Gadgets should be banned from restaurants unless used silently

OP, you are not unreasonable at all.
people listening to devices in general at a loud volume really pisses me off. It’s not the kids fault but the stupid parents who allow it and are completely oblivious to other people. Rude in most settings but unacceptable in a restaurant. I think it’s really shitty parenting tbh

Still no excuse for iPads on full blast

I think we need to be tolerant of kids being kids. They occasionally scream or shout etc. but if it’s persistent or they won’t stop running around then an adult needs to take them outside. That’s what we do with our kids. Then we swap over and the other adult takes their turn with the child outside while the other eats. We miss out on eating together but that’s the chance you take when dining out with small children.

But in a restaurant where a meal is £50 a head (or possibly £100, I'm not clear if the £100 quoted was for both meals or just one!), diners are entitled to expect a reasonable degree of quiet, so that they can converse without raised voices and enjoy their meal in a relaxing atmosphere. If OP had wanted to sit next to shouting children, she'd have gone to a child-friendly restaurant, or taken a packed lunch to soft play.

I've never seen this sort of bad behaviour from children in restaurants in France, Italy, Greece, Germany or Belgium. I don't get why it's such a common phenomenon in the UK.

My DSS always behaved well in pubs and restaurants once he was out of the toddler years, and his daughter, now 10, has been perfectly happy to sit, eat and chat with adults without finding it necessary to shout or listen to noisy games since she was approx 3 years old.

On a couple of occasions, I've found the racket from badly behaved children so intrusive that I've asked to cancel my food order in a pub. Both times, the parents were spoken to by the staff and told that if their kids continued to disturb people, they would have to leave.

Speak to the staff.

I get that children are entitled to go out to eat with their parents but the parents (and their children) are not entitled to ruin your lovely lunch with your friend.

There seem to be a few people commenting on this thread about people needing to have tolerance for other people’s children. Whilst tolerance is great, if you ruin my time with your poor parenting and poorly behaved child, my tolerance will run out sharpish. Parent your children properly!

It’s just such scuzzy low life, trashy behaviour. These sorts of people are the worst of the worst. I cannot believe they can go through life thinking or caring so little about anyone else around them. What sort of what sort of adults will these kids grow up to be? The mind boggles.

YANBU generally but YABU to say it's ok or to be expected in pizza express or a carvery. Same standards should apply.