Pet cats making my hate my home

Kittens usually become more sedate once they are 2 or so, which means there is a good chance your cats will start spending most of their time sleeping from next year which might make some of the sensory issues you have around them a little easier.

@Puppylucky and as I’ve already said I would happily rehome but charity have said it’s pointless to try. To not declare their bad behaviour would result in them being bounced around homes. Give me a viable alternative please.

edit: this wasn’t meant to be about my health and happiness. It was about OPs. She doesn’t have to live unhappily for up to 20 years, with cats she’s said in her post she’s struggling with, if she doesn’t want to. She matters too and there are alternatives to being unhappy in her own home.

@Puppylucky they have access to the outside. They actively come back in to poo. I have sought advice from a local charity, from our vet, hours and hours of research over the years. They came to us already not using a litter tray consistently and have never got better. I have given them a lot of consideration and bent over backwards to accommodate them and you don’t have a clue. This is boring and I’m comfortable that I’ve exhausted all other options and should not have to live amongst faeces. Baffled by any suggestion it’s cruel to not accept this.

But literally no-one is saying sacrifice your health and happiness. What people are saying is act responsibly towards your animals by rehoming and stop trying to compare them to farm cats!

@Hibernatingsloth they go outside and have an inside space too which is the conservatory. I’m baffled as to why this is so controversial. I grew up rural and a lot of cats live healthily and happily outdoors so long as shelter, food, and healthcare are provided. It is not the worst thing that could possibly happen to a cat. I’ve said in a previous post (and this thread isn’t even meant to be about me) that we’ve been told the cats are pretty unrehome-able so we’re doing the best we can without sacrificing our health and well-being. I commented on this post to offer OP some support because I’m aware of the gaslighting that goes on by cat people trying to make people think they should sacrifice their health and happiness for cats, and the replies I’ve had have shown I am correct.

@IKnowWhatTheAnswerIs I'm not being self righteous I am genuinely concerned for your animals welfare. Your cats are not feral cats - born and bred outside, they are unwanted family pets. It's very unusual for cats to poo in the house without a medical reason but if they won't use litter trays why aren't you just letting them go outside ? And as an aside if you are going to stick them in a shed or garage where they will poo freely you really are creating a health hazard. You describe yourself as a former crazy cat lady but I'm not sure you are giving your cats welfare a second thought. I appreciate your concerns for your daughter but these don't give you free reign to be cruel.

My cat eats exclusively dry food. Could you try that? It’s better for their teeth anyway and so long as they drink water the vet said it wasn’t a problem. That may help with one aspect- the smell. Could you discuss with your family about a time you can all agree is the latest one of them needs to go downstairs and see to the cats so you aren’t stuck upstairs waiting for a large chunk of the morning?

They are only kittens so they will be up to all sorts at the moment but when they grow up they will sleep more and generally be calmer

@IKnowWhatTheAnswerIs I didn’t see your update sorry, I appreciate that must be really difficult to deal with.

Your poor cats!
Are you seriously saying that the cats you currently have confined to a conservatory are now going to be banished to a garage or shed with a catflap to an outside catio???
Your cats would be better off being surrendered to a cat charity for adoption elsewhere., where they can be loved.

Yes I keep my bathroom STRICTLY cat free! It's my only fluff free place tbh, as most of my house is open plan, even though they wait outside for me when im in there, but yes It does annoy me slightly the amount of fluff, little dirty footprints etc, it does add in to the household duties quite a lot even though there small clean pets, if I didn't have the cats I'd probably scratch the cleaning by a third at least and I live alone and not messy, they make more mess than me! Maybe it's because they are shedding right now for spring or is it year round? Because I've found more hair recently and was thinking there maybe thinning out for spring as I've found clumpe of fur and more hair loss in the last couple of weeks

I adopted a cat on spur of moment without giving it enough thought and it was very difficult at the start. He’s a mad predator so he would bring ‘things’ into the house any chance he got. I also couldn’t stand litter trays. I, same as a PP, got a cat flap that is connected to his chip so only he can use it. I’ve set it to only let him go out and not in so that he can’t bring anything in. He has a good house with a bed in outside so he has shelter if needed. He doesn’t use a litter tray he goes outside. Then I keep an eye on when he is out and let him in so long as he is alone! I have kitchen sun room and when I want some cat free peace I put him in there and he’s happy enough until I come get him. His food and bed and toys are there. It wasn’t easy in the beginning and has cost a lot for adjustments but it works now for both us and I wouldn’t be without him. It’s like kids, boundaries!

@HolyMoly24 @MidnightMeltdown you think this even with my update? I took the cats on at the request of a family member who knew of them, I spent 8 years trying to live alongside them (protected space for their litter trays, 4 litter trays, different kinds of litter, enzyme sprays, pheromone diffusers, changing carpets, vet prescribed stress medicine and so on) and yet they still pood around the house. Which is why I presume they were rehomed to us in the first place. I think I’ve done more than most would to try to accommodate them, I have a preschooler and am pregnant so there is a real risk of illness, and fundamentally our health and well-being matters more. I have explored rehoming but suspect they would get bounced around homes by others who don’t want cat poo in their house. The uncompromising attitude of cat people is bewildering.

Cats definitely settle down once they're around 3 ime. Can they go outside? Totally game changer, although I am lucky to be rural so no worry of busy roads etc

Your poor cats!

millions of families have babies and cats living together harmoniously (I do!) and no one is getting ill or anything negative from it. My toddler loves our cat and has already learned to be gentle when stroking her, not to touch the cat food/water etc

the fact you used to love them and now they are being relegated to ‘part of the garage’ is so so sad.

This is batshit. It was YOUR decision to take on the cats not theirs. I don’t understand people who get animals and think they can just dump them off when it’s no longer convenient. Your cats are used to living indoors.

A few people on this thread saying cats shouldn’t live anywhere but a family home. Feral cats are a thing and do fine in barns. A lot of licensed catteries are also technically outside. We approached a local rescue about rehoming but because our cats do not use the litter and toilet in the house we were told it would be pretty impossible to rehome them. And yes I’ve tried everything down to vet prescribed stress medication and changing carpets. @megacat @Puppylucky @HostaCentral @EmpressaurusKitty so please stop being so self righteous. I’m not going to subject my daughter to living amongst cat poo or risk toxoplasmosis for my unborn baby.

At the moment they are the equivalent of young teenagers. They will grow up and calm down over the next year. Your husband and children do need to take responsibility for most of the practical bits of cat parenting as it was them who wanted them.

You’re going to make your cats live in a shed or garage? Seriously? What about when it’s cold?

If you don’t want your cats to live in the main house and be treated as part of the family then you need to rehome them.

@ginasevern it's @IKnowWhatTheAnswerIs who needs to consider rehoming
Edit: apologies I completely misread!

@Tesora I can understand the kids begging for a pet, kids usually do at some point. But what on earth was wrong with your husband? Surely he had some idea that you were completely unsuited to it (autistic or not). Please take the advice of @EmpressaurusKitty If you want to rehome them do not advertise them on social media or Pets 4 Homes or similar sites, or consider giving/selling them to anyone you don't know very, very well. Take them to an accredited rescue centre otherwise god knows what horrible fate will befall them.

As well as autism, this sounds like you have OCD as well? Cats are mostly clean animals as they lick themselves and traces of saliva going onto other surfaces shouldn't be causing any detriment to your health (unless its an allergy).

This makes me so sad. Cats are excellent with babies and children, and very helpful for reducing allergies. No-one ever gets sick from general contact with cats.

You are basically banishing your once loved cats to exile.

I was thinking that too. It’s a shame, & rescues are brimming over, but the cats deserve to live somewhere they’re loved & wanted. Do you spend much time playing with & stroking them?

FFS don’t advertise them on social media or Pets 4 Homes though - if you have any independent rescues locally, they may agree to advertise the cats for you & vet potential adopters in return for a donation.

Some good constructive suggestions here I think