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AIBU?

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Original poster

To feel like I’m not going to have a baby now I’m 30

61 replies

JollyLilacGoose · 15/02/2026 00:26

No partner and obviously time is running out. It also feels like basically everyone my age is a mother now or pregnant.

OP posts:
Matildahoney · 15/02/2026 08:17

I met my DH at 36, we had our first at 41, and at 43 I'm pregnant with our second. So it's definitely possible

MabelMoo23 · 15/02/2026 08:14

I didn’t meet my now husband until I was 36 had my kids at 39 and 41

MyLimeGuide · 15/02/2026 08:14

Do this thread in 10 years and we might emphathise.

GlmPmum · 15/02/2026 08:12

Give over, plenty of time! I met my husband at 30, married at 34 and had our DS at 36.

Strawberrryfields · 15/02/2026 08:11

mmmarmalade · 15/02/2026 08:05

32 and 35 for my two - never even crossed my mind to worry about it.

Ok but when did you meet their father? I don’t think 30 is too old at all but can understand being single at 30 and having a wobble.

mmmarmalade · 15/02/2026 08:05

32 and 35 for my two - never even crossed my mind to worry about it.

LoftyAmberLion · 15/02/2026 08:02

How ridiculous. You’ve got years ahead of you.

SalmonOnFinnCrisp · 15/02/2026 08:02

Honestly are you actually meeting single men?

I had this "crisis" at 31 and did an audit. I met / interacted 2 decent single men in a month and 1 was gay!
I realised i wanted a life partner and probably a family? I spend over 3 yrs on the hell holes that are tinder and bumble... I treated it as a part time job. Literally i did 16/20 hr of matching or dating per week.

I married at 37 had my kids at 38 and 40.
I'm 42 in a 5 bed house with a nice husband 2 kids and a dog.

it takes work and some luck but It can be done.

WeepingAngelInTheTardis · 15/02/2026 08:01

Im 34, had my kids young but most of my friends are just having babies now!

Peonies12 · 15/02/2026 08:00

all my friends and I had kids in our mid to late 30s. I think you’re panicking unnecessarily.

Twooclockrock · 15/02/2026 07:56

Most of my friendship group met their partners post 30 and then had a child after that.

ZenNudist · 15/02/2026 07:47

cupfinalchaos · 15/02/2026 07:44

Don’t be ridiculous! My dd is 29 and no one in her circle is thinking of kids yet.

Yup

cupfinalchaos · 15/02/2026 07:44

Don’t be ridiculous! My dd is 29 and no one in her circle is thinking of kids yet.

Morepositivemum · 15/02/2026 07:43

I remember a work colleague saying this age 39, she said I have to accept it, there’s nobody out there for me and I’ll never have kids. Four years later I bumped into her, her very sound husband and their new baby. A few years on they’ve another child and I see the two of them on Facebook saying how lucky they are

Twittable · 15/02/2026 07:42

I had my last child at 40, my mum had me in her mid thirties and my Nan had my uncle in her forties! You hopefully have plenty of time but agree with pp who say you should date with intention - no time wasting wazzocks!

Junibug · 15/02/2026 07:38

You’ve potentially got another 10-15 years to have kids. Don’t stress! I had mine at 39, 40 and 44….

thehistorymum · 15/02/2026 07:36

Best friend met / moved in with her fella and had their little one all after leaving a previous relationship at 32.

ImpatientlyWaitingForSummer · 15/02/2026 07:33

I felt exactly like this as well. I met my partner at 35 and I’d been single for 10 years before that! We had our first when I was 37 and our second at 39 - it’s not too late! Everyone in my friendship group other than one person who had one child unexpectedly in her 20s, had their children between 32-39

Peridoteage · 15/02/2026 07:33

I had my first at 31 and was the first of my social group to have one. Most of the women were 33/34. There was also a wave of babies late 30s when some blokes who refused to settle down earlier suddenly realised they were quite jealous of their mates families and didn't want to be first time dads at 45 and very hurriedly got started

NameChangedForThis2025 · 15/02/2026 07:30

I had my son at 41, met my partner when I was 38. Many of the mums we know with similar age kids (4 years olds) are mid to late 30s, some in their 40s like me.

If you want to take the pressure off a bit, you could consider freezing your eggs before you turn 35.

TheatreTraveller · 15/02/2026 07:28

30 is very very young! At 30 I was just marrying husband number 1 (no kids) I didn't get together with husband number 2 until 8yrs later. I then had my 2 beautiful children at 39 and 42. You have lots of time yet :)

Rayqueen2026 · 15/02/2026 07:22

Not sure how you come to that conclusion but my friends are in there 40s and currently pregnant or just had one in the last year, I'm 41 and had 3 in the last 2 years

Primrose86 · 15/02/2026 01:58

JollyLilacGoose · 15/02/2026 00:26

No partner and obviously time is running out. It also feels like basically everyone my age is a mother now or pregnant.

I am a mum of a 7 month old baby boy. No one in my NCT group is younger than 31 (London). I didnt use contraception circa age 22 to 32 and only fell pregnant once in my life in October 2024. If anyone had terrible odds of never having a baby, it was me because I had literally been married since age 22 but was rolling up to my 9th wedding anniversary without a single positive pregnancy test. However, my son was born just 1 day shy of my 10th wedding anniversary. 100% natural conception

Meanwhile the oldest lady in my nct group literally got pregnant within 6 months of her wedding (at age 37). She is happy with 1 child but considering a second..

While its true that being in your 30s decreases the chance of pregnancy, there is stats but there are also individuals. There is a 66% chance you will get pregnant within a year even at age 37.ÿ

TooBigForMyBoots · 15/02/2026 01:52

YABU.

I had my first at 34 and my 2nd, 11 years later.🙈

CastlesinSpain · 15/02/2026 01:49

My friend's daughter, who is in her mid 30s, has just had her second child by donor (same person's sperm). She does not have a partner and doesn't want one.
My friend, though happy to have grandchildren, is somewhat peeved. In the absence of a father her daughter has lumbered her with far more child care than she'd like.

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