Inappropriate deep tissue massage

That’s awful I’m so sorry.

I was sexually assaulted by a GP when I was 17.

it’s horrible that we have to consider that people we are going to for medical help, and who we think of as trustworthy professionals, may be predators.

I’m really sorry this happened to you. I think reporting it to the club and/ or his professional body is a good idea, if you feel up to it. As pp have said you don’t have to decide whether it was deliberate or accidental, you can report what happened without speculating on that.

It’s really normal, and involuntary, to freeze when this kind of thing happens.

predators rely on this.

Why would you not just move your hands?

It's not a good massage if boundaries have been crossed and you felt his genitals on your hands.

I would raise a complaint and book a next massage, if you have to have one, with a female. Problem solved. If you go back and allow him to massage you again after this experience then that's a you problem. A massage shouldn't be making you question what part of the masseuse's anatomy was rubbing on yout hands. That's weird and inappropriate.

At the very least I'd be emailing them (so its on record) saying that their genitals were resting on your hand during the massage and it made you feel uncomfortable. And you want them to know so they can avoid it for future clients.

That way if you ever did want to pursue it you have written it down on record, and at if they really were unaware, they know now.

I have regular back, neck and shoulder massages for ongoing issues. Never once have my arms been on the table, I'm told to drop my arms over the side of the massage table, so they're hanging towards the floor.

Once may have been a mistake, several times is not. There's no way he didn't realise

He really put it on your hand? That is awful! I'd have been inclined to dig my nails into it and make him yell but - probably would have frozen.

I did have a similar experience years ago, not quite as bad as that but pretty offensive. I could do nothing because I had no proof, it was just him and me in the room at the time, but I did cancel any further appointments and refused to speak to the staff when they rang.

I daresay you don't have proof so it is up to you whether or not you report the man - but tell someone, just to register that it happened. It's likely to happen again to somebody else (I presume you won't go back), and if they make a formal complaint you can back them.

I wouldn't. But definitely the sports club and osteopath association.

I would report to.police.

Maybe you could frame it as 'feedback' as it was clearly inappropriate and made you feel uncomfortable. But there is also a slight possibility that it was accidental and you are hesitant to report.

By providing this feedback and if other people have reported similar experiences, it could be taken further. But if it was an accident, then he might be more mindful not to put his penis in any future clients hands.

I laughed out loud when i saw the link. Surely that isnt serious.

Police. Google review.

Are you a male? You say you've had extensive experience, do you mean as a client or practitioner?

The pervs and misogynists on Mnet. There are more of them than you think.

YANBU @Purpl. You were sexually assaulted.

PM me if you like but it’s worth ringing 101. You don’t have to give a statement but the more reports the better and they’ve been really good with me

Yes it was x

OP said he’s a qualified osteopath so the General Osteopathic Council. It’s the UK regulatory body, all osteopaths have to be registered with them to practice and they investigate complaints.

OP, as a complementary therapist myself, I’m horrified by this. Please make a report. He can’t be allowed to get away with this kind of revolting behaviour.

You're thread title is minimizing this - it should read "I've just been sexually assaulted"...

Was it NW area? Because the police are still hearing from people and it’s worth reporting

I'm so sorry you experienced this OP.

One of my exes had a similar experience with a chiropractor. Not even with genitals, but saying he needed to work on her chest, which she found odd. But she got along well with him and told herself she was being paranoid, so she didn't report it.

Years later, she got a call from the police. Apparently he'd assaulted 30+ female clients, including young girls. The assaults were more subtle with the older women, worse with the young girls who I guess he knew wouldn't be as clued up. He ran a big, popular practice with hundreds of 5* reviews. He tried to flee the country but was found, and now he's now in prison.

If my ex had reported it, she may have prevented him doing these things to young girls. And if someone else had reported him sooner, it might have prevented him doing it to my ex.

I've never been to an osteopath, but I do get a lot of tattoos, which is obviously all intimate, body to body contact, in the zone type stuff, for hours on end, and you get quite comfortable with each other. Yet every artist I've had has been very aware when inappropriate body parts are touching, and they always apologise and slightly shift away, as you would expect. So I just can't imagine him not being aware.

If it were me, I would reach out to whatever the professional body is for osteopaths and seek advice. Just tell them what you've told us and go from there.

I found the link for those asking https://benbenjamin.com/make-pelvic-contact-with-the-clients-head-or-body/

Please report this to The General Osteopathic Council. This is sadly all too common and he breeches his regulators standards. The fake accidental inappropriate touching is a method used to make you doubt something happened. I can guarantee he is doing this to other women and is targeting women who he is guessing are unlikely to report him.

I once had similar happen during a blood test at my local hospital. I was sat in the armchair with my arm stretched out, when the man doing it approached. He was a weird looking, scruffy man and he never spoke one word to me. I shut my eyes as he inserted the needle and next thing, I felt his genitals pressing onto my hand. I opened my eyes and he was leaning over me, straddling the arm of the chair my hand was resting on, he basically had my hand trapped between his legs. I was so shocked and couldn't quite believe what was happening, that I just left quickly after he'd taken blood. It was a few years ago and at the time I was feeling very ill with a possible life threatening condition (which thankfully the blood test showed I didn't have). If I hadn't been so sick I would have challenged him there and then but I felt so shaken up and I'd been sent there as an urgent case, that I just wanted to get out of the place. I told my friend who'd accompanied me and had waited outside but she seemed to brush it off as my imagination. Everyone at home was only interested in my results and no one seemed to be listening to me when I told them what he did, then I was so relieved when my tests were clear that I just tried to put it to the back of my mind. Reading this has confirmed to me that these things do actually happen and I believe now that I was assaulted and it wasn't accidental.

This happened to me but unfortunately I could feel that he was fully aroused. He was self employed so I just stopped having him. I've since just found out that he's been arrested and charged with sexual assault and three further women have come forward. I wish I had said something at the time in light of what's continued to happen but when someone is self employed what can you do.