Page 2 | My child is being assaulted

ImplodingLoading · 2026-02-13T22:26:39+00:00

DD 7has been assaulted multiple times by 2 boys in her year. She has been punched, slapped, kicked and pushed over. Schools advice is for her to "keep away from the boys she knows are known to be volatile" so when they are playing whole year games, for example, the school have suggested she "uses clear language to ensure they are ready for theor turn, so as not to provoke their anger" and "when explained to the girls that their are some boys who are prone to angry outbursts, and the girls should avoid being around them" AIBU, or is this absolutely ridiculous?!

Original poster

ImplodingLoading · 14/02/2026 22:09

Barnbrack · 14/02/2026 22:06

What's he doing exactly? How badly hurt is she? Like is he full on attacking her or is it shoving etc like the other child?

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Punching her in the stomach and face, has taken her belongs and threw them/stamped on them. Threatened to break her glasses and water bottle, snapped her pencils, threatened to rip her coat.

OP posts:

Barnbrack · 14/02/2026 22:07

ImplodingLoading · 14/02/2026 22:04

Yes, of course it is, but the school brought it up because said child has been know to harm a lot of other girls, just never my DD before.

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I thought he was a new child? How long has he been there to harm many girls?

Original poster

ImplodingLoading · 14/02/2026 22:07

EnidSpyton · 14/02/2026 22:02

You can support us when we go on strike.
You can support us by writing to your MP about the lack of funding being put into education and early years provision.
You can support us by being part of campaigns to make education a spending priority for the government.
You can support us by not contributing to the endless vitriol about teachers online, including on this thread.

The more all parents make it clear to the government that education is their priority, and that they respect and value the teaching profession, and the state of our education system is an issue that will dictate for whom they choose to vote at the next election, then the more the government will be under pressure to allocate spending accordingly.

At the moment, the government can get away with doing fuck all about the state of our schools because everyone is too busy moaning about 'boat people' to recognise that the vast majority of issues in this country are down to too many people who were born and bred here having a poor start in life.

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I totally understand, I have several family members and friends who are teachers/school staff and I absolutely support you all

OP posts:

Barnbrack · 14/02/2026 22:06

ImplodingLoading · 14/02/2026 22:04

Yes, of course it is, but the school brought it up because said child has been know to harm a lot of other girls, just never my DD before.

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What's he doing exactly? How badly hurt is she? Like is he full on attacking her or is it shoving etc like the other child?

Original poster

ImplodingLoading · 14/02/2026 22:04

Barnbrack · 14/02/2026 21:53

So a child, who had never bothered her before. Shoved past her and she shoved him back? That's the biggest non event in school history.

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Yes, of course it is, but the school brought it up because said child has been know to harm a lot of other girls, just never my DD before.

OP posts:

EnidSpyton · 14/02/2026 22:02

EvangelineTheNightStar · 14/02/2026 20:40

@EnidSpyton well what can parents do to support teachers? To help support them with ensuring that these children who are violent and agressive and are frequently attacking others, children and staff, are suspended and if necessary permanently excluded?

You can support us when we go on strike.
You can support us by writing to your MP about the lack of funding being put into education and early years provision.
You can support us by being part of campaigns to make education a spending priority for the government.
You can support us by not contributing to the endless vitriol about teachers online, including on this thread.

The more all parents make it clear to the government that education is their priority, and that they respect and value the teaching profession, and the state of our education system is an issue that will dictate for whom they choose to vote at the next election, then the more the government will be under pressure to allocate spending accordingly.

At the moment, the government can get away with doing fuck all about the state of our schools because everyone is too busy moaning about 'boat people' to recognise that the vast majority of issues in this country are down to too many people who were born and bred here having a poor start in life.

Original poster

ImplodingLoading · 14/02/2026 22:01

Zoopet · 14/02/2026 21:48

🙄

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Yes?

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Original poster

ImplodingLoading · 14/02/2026 21:59

Barnbrack · 14/02/2026 21:42

How would you know? They can't tell you if he's had punishment etc. or do you know the mum?

I have a daughter as well as a son and as a woman definitely if I hadn't seen the dynamics in my son's class I never would have believed how much the space invader kids cause chaos then stand back bewildered. Watch your daughter in the situations and ask yourself is she crowing/being inappropriate? Do the school say she is? Because that is not acceptable behaviour either and does need worked on.

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Because I asked, and the school told me. Then they said they advised I ask my child to walk away from him/not be around him/not speak to him at all in case it provokes him and he is known to be a reactive child who angers quickly and lashes out.

DD isn't the only girl who has been assaulted by him.

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Original poster

ImplodingLoading · 14/02/2026 21:56

Barnbrack · 14/02/2026 21:52

Your updates certainly state you don't think she's doing anything wrong but you seem completely unwilling to accept your child can have done anything wrong.

Yet 2 different children are struggling with her behaviour

The teachers are definitely taking the stance that her behaviour is causing a problem.

As I say, my son has never pushed/hit out etc again the girl who crowds him but her crowing effects him massively. If he was a kid who struggled not to hit out I'd definitely understand why he'd be hitting out in that scenario.

Why are you so against your child being asked not to deliberately annoy other children?

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Because she isn't annoying other children, and my other child/other children I know have witnessed her being sought out and hit, or simply saying ko to his request to stand in her place and being hit, or trying to pull her friend from him, and being hit.

I am not one of those mums who thinks their children are perfect. But I know, she isn't just being an arsehole. She's simply existing and not running away from him.

OP posts:

Barnbrack · 14/02/2026 21:53

ImplodingLoading · 14/02/2026 21:50

There are two children. One main child, boy, who has hit my daughter several times. A second boy, who pushed her once because he wanted past her and she was facing away from him, so instead of as, he shoved her, and because she has been assaulted by the first child twice that week, she got up off the ground and shoved him back, as I had advised her to do with the first child.

I always teach all my children to be kind, never raise their hands first. But I do also tell them they can always hit back. The pushing back incident was the only time any of my children have ever done so.

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So a child, who had never bothered her before. Shoved past her and she shoved him back? That's the biggest non event in school history.

Original poster

ImplodingLoading · 14/02/2026 21:53

TakeALookAtTheseSwatches · 14/02/2026 21:49

I think people are just trying to say things may not be as they seem. You have no idea if your daughter is invading their space because you're not there, she well could be.

You seem absolutely certain of what's happened to the boys because of their behaviour but you don't actually know for sure because they wouldn't tell you, just like you don't know whether your daughter is behaving inappropriately towards these boys.

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I do know that the boys haven't been excluded, I do know that they haven't missed a single break time or lunch time, and I do know that they haven't been supervised, because I have another child at the school, along with family and friends children who can confirm this. It's a very small school.

OP posts:

Renisenb · 14/02/2026 21:53

Hi there - I’m a teacher. Get the “advice” to stay away from/not “provoke” in writing.
then go to ofsted they will take this seriously especially at that age lmk if you need more info/help xx

Barnbrack · 14/02/2026 21:52

ImplodingLoading · 14/02/2026 21:46

Oh you seem like the beacon of all knowledge and wisdom... please do tell me how I should parent my child, because I clearly have no clue. Or maybe, just maybe, you should read my updates, and see my child is doing nothing wrong

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Your updates certainly state you don't think she's doing anything wrong but you seem completely unwilling to accept your child can have done anything wrong.

Yet 2 different children are struggling with her behaviour

The teachers are definitely taking the stance that her behaviour is causing a problem.

As I say, my son has never pushed/hit out etc again the girl who crowds him but her crowing effects him massively. If he was a kid who struggled not to hit out I'd definitely understand why he'd be hitting out in that scenario.

Why are you so against your child being asked not to deliberately annoy other children?

Original poster

ImplodingLoading · 14/02/2026 21:51

ImplodingLoading · 14/02/2026 21:50

There are two children. One main child, boy, who has hit my daughter several times. A second boy, who pushed her once because he wanted past her and she was facing away from him, so instead of as, he shoved her, and because she has been assaulted by the first child twice that week, she got up off the ground and shoved him back, as I had advised her to do with the first child.

I always teach all my children to be kind, never raise their hands first. But I do also tell them they can always hit back. The pushing back incident was the only time any of my children have ever done so.

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And yes, they are hitting other children. Only girls, mind you.

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Original poster

ImplodingLoading · 14/02/2026 21:50

Barnbrack · 14/02/2026 21:44

So 2 separate children?

Not close friends either so not a group of kids picking on her.

Do the same boys hot other children? It does sound a lot like your daughter may be provoking something. Especially because of your complete unwillingness to accept a girl who has ASD and ADHD could be anything other than socially appropriate

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There are two children. One main child, boy, who has hit my daughter several times. A second boy, who pushed her once because he wanted past her and she was facing away from him, so instead of as, he shoved her, and because she has been assaulted by the first child twice that week, she got up off the ground and shoved him back, as I had advised her to do with the first child.

I always teach all my children to be kind, never raise their hands first. But I do also tell them they can always hit back. The pushing back incident was the only time any of my children have ever done so.

OP posts:

TakeALookAtTheseSwatches · 14/02/2026 21:49

ImplodingLoading · 14/02/2026 21:46

Oh you seem like the beacon of all knowledge and wisdom... please do tell me how I should parent my child, because I clearly have no clue. Or maybe, just maybe, you should read my updates, and see my child is doing nothing wrong

Show quote history

I think people are just trying to say things may not be as they seem. You have no idea if your daughter is invading their space because you're not there, she well could be.

You seem absolutely certain of what's happened to the boys because of their behaviour but you don't actually know for sure because they wouldn't tell you, just like you don't know whether your daughter is behaving inappropriately towards these boys.

Zoopet · 14/02/2026 21:48

ImplodingLoading · 14/02/2026 21:39

None of this has been done, his parents have been informed, and the entire class has had a talking to about being kind and not using your hands, from the assistant head.

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🙄

Original poster

ImplodingLoading · 14/02/2026 21:46

Barnbrack · 14/02/2026 21:43

This posters daughter is crowding a child a lot by the sounds of it, enough that school have spoke. To her about her behaviour and her mum doesn't see why she should address her child's behaviour at all. That's also feckless

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Oh you seem like the beacon of all knowledge and wisdom... please do tell me how I should parent my child, because I clearly have no clue. Or maybe, just maybe, you should read my updates, and see my child is doing nothing wrong

OP posts:

Barnbrack · 14/02/2026 21:44

ImplodingLoading · 14/02/2026 21:41

I don't know thw main child's dad, but the mum seems pleasant and has chatted to me prior to this. The usual niceties at pick up and drop off. The other child is a new start and I know nothing about his family.

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So 2 separate children?

Not close friends either so not a group of kids picking on her.

Do the same boys hot other children? It does sound a lot like your daughter may be provoking something. Especially because of your complete unwillingness to accept a girl who has ASD and ADHD could be anything other than socially appropriate

Barnbrack · 14/02/2026 21:43

forrea · 14/02/2026 21:39

Feckless parents make feckless children. These boys probably don't have nice daddies.

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This posters daughter is crowding a child a lot by the sounds of it, enough that school have spoke. To her about her behaviour and her mum doesn't see why she should address her child's behaviour at all. That's also feckless

Barnbrack · 14/02/2026 21:42

ImplodingLoading · 14/02/2026 21:39

None of this has been done, his parents have been informed, and the entire class has had a talking to about being kind and not using your hands, from the assistant head.

Show quote history

How would you know? They can't tell you if he's had punishment etc. or do you know the mum?

I have a daughter as well as a son and as a woman definitely if I hadn't seen the dynamics in my son's class I never would have believed how much the space invader kids cause chaos then stand back bewildered. Watch your daughter in the situations and ask yourself is she crowing/being inappropriate? Do the school say she is? Because that is not acceptable behaviour either and does need worked on.

Original poster

ImplodingLoading · 14/02/2026 21:41

forrea · 14/02/2026 21:39

Feckless parents make feckless children. These boys probably don't have nice daddies.

Show quote history

I don't know thw main child's dad, but the mum seems pleasant and has chatted to me prior to this. The usual niceties at pick up and drop off. The other child is a new start and I know nothing about his family.

OP posts:

forrea · 14/02/2026 21:39

Catsbreakfast · 13/02/2026 22:56

Wtf? How about the two violent boys don’t get to abuse other pupils?!

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Feckless parents make feckless children. These boys probably don't have nice daddies.

Original poster

ImplodingLoading · 14/02/2026 21:39

Barnbrack · 14/02/2026 21:36

You don't know what has been said or done towards the boy wo has punched, for all you know he's been given detentions, suspended. Placed in special measures, reduced timetable, op would have no idea because it wouldnt be shared with her. The only bit she gets to know is what they've said to her child. Which is 'font keep going up to a child deliberately who is hurting you' because IST the only change she can make.

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None of this has been done, his parents have been informed, and the entire class has had a talking to about being kind and not using your hands, from the assistant head.

OP posts:

PURPLErainiswhatmadePrincegreat · 14/02/2026 21:37

this country has gone to pots