AIBU To Think Remote Work Isn't Sustainable?

Working remotely is the main thing that is helping my family manage two full time working adults and childcare for two kids, one with SEN. No family around. I understand the social isolation you might be feeling but if remote working isn’t for you then change your job or make extra efforts to connect with your colleagues socially. My autistic colleague has thrived on being fully remote as she was previously struggling with noise and bulshit corporate small talk which was draining her. It might not be sustainable for you but it’s actually a lifeline for many others.

I’ve been wfh since 2008 in corporate jobs across 4 different companies. I have lots of meetings and would consider many of my colleagues “friends” despite not meeting in person. We chat about home lives, share holiday photos, complain about our kids etc.. as you would do with any colleague. Some of these folks I’ve worked with across more than one company and for nearly 10 years now. Try calling instead of Teams chat!

If you can’t go in there for most of the day, it sounds like you work from home too?

Because Nigel Farage talked about it earlier this week, some people are responding with a reaction to that in mind.
In truth, being totally isolated isn't generally as good for a person's mental health. Working from home is very convenient, I do it, and it of course opens up avenues to people, such as living rurally whilst working in a role that might previously have to be done in person in a town/city.
I now work hybrid after a few years of working solely from home, and I find the two days in the office, touching base with colleagues, even after a commute, worthwhile.
I also agree with a pp that for some in the younger generation, working from home without knowing and dealing with regular in-person work and the social interactions that entails means they lose out.

It’s not sustainable for you.. that doesn’t mean that remote working in itself is unsustainable. You could always look for a different job, ask to go into your own office full time, go to one of those work space hot desk offices on your home days instead? I’m also confused that you say you don’t talk all day but also say you chat away on Teams?
Personally, I would burn out very quickly and be awful at my job too if I had colleagues talking in my face and Teams pinging away, had to waste time and money on a commute, etc, every single day. I think remote working is fantastic for many of us, but if it doesn’t suit you, change, rather than try to take it off everyone else!

I have been wfh for over 10yrs as I work with mainly US colleagues and this allows me to be flexible with my hours to fit around meetings. I find remote working to be useful to get the best candidates without being limited by location. I know one company before covid that made a lot of their wfh redundant and insisted on office based and in only one location and within 2yrs they had changed back to remote as they couldn’t find enough good candidates when they put such location restrictions on their
recruitment.
I personally love working from home as it gives me flexibility with my family whilst still meeting or exceeding my work targets. I think it depends on your personality if wfh suits you.

Go back 50 years and many of these services were actually done by people working from home, while others had a minimal commute.

The local doctor had a surgery in his front room. The local policeman lived in a house in the village or on the housing estate - a house paid for by the police force and often with a small office attached. The school was run by a head who lived on site, as did the caretaker and sometimes some of the teachers.

Then things got bigger, centralised, rationalised - all in the name of cost savings and economies of scale. So now people travel miles to see a doctor or to get to school. The police work from a big building next to the motorway but miles away from the local communities that they are supposed to be serving. The staff likewise have to travel miles to get to work, wasting hours commuting every day.

For what it's worth, I now live in a country where the local fire brigade is staffed entirely by volunteers. They work their normal, local jobs and are called in if there is an incident. Far from the country ceasing to exist, this arrangement is common in much of Europe, including Germany, and actually helps to bind the community together.

I agree. Best of both worlds.

Swap your typed Teams chats for an actual chat over Teams.

Your working style is causing your problem. Not the fact your team is in another location.

@HighlandsExpat this is good advice.

In my team I see half of them once a week or so in the office, the other half two to three times a year as they're remote. We have a weekly full team catch up that's mostly work related and a monthly smaller catch up where we just "connect".

I think lots of people 30+ are happier WFH but I really feel for people in their 20s as my whole 20s was after work drinks and I made a lot of my adult friends at work. It’s making young people even more isolated than they were

Are you in a position to switch things up a bit? Can you have Teams meetings instead of written chat? We have 'huddles' which are part business, part checking in on how everyone is. These were started in COVID when people were mostly WFH. We are now hybrid, with most people WFH once or twice a week, but are an opportunity for people to come together across sites

Personally my preference is WFH mostly. I'd love to only need to go in a couple of times a month. However I recognise that for my work, some stuff works much better in person, either formal meetings or incidental conversations e.g. 'can I just ask...' which they wouldn't message to ask.

But in this scenario, it's absolutely a choice that OP can make without fear of the country collapsing. She's not enjoying being fully remote from her team in a role she doesn't need lots of meetings for. So she can change that to a more in person type role.

If you don't want a WFH job then get another job that requires you to be in the office more. Don't ruin WFH for those of us that enjoy it! Me personally I would love to be full time WFH, I don't have a commute, get to spend the day with my partner if she's WFH and my dogs, I still chat to people on the phone and teams if I need to and am social with actual friends outside of work. If WFH doesn't suit you then change jobs, I don't think people who choose hybrid or WFH jobs should be making a fuss and ruining it for those who prefer it!

Also says they chat on Teams all day.

If the rest of OP’s team are located in another office, maybe OP is the one working remotely: i.e. wouldn’t have been able to get the job if office-based, as it’d be in that location.

OP, suggest you speak to your line manager about feeling isolated from your team. You could maybe suggest setting up virtual coffee breaks with team members. Also, try to get to know people in the office you work in and taking breaks and lunch with them?

And maybe start looking for another job where most of the team is in the same office.

Remote working is hugely environmentally sustainable as it saves on travel energy, pollution, safer roads etc. It’s also sustainable because it allows people more job opportunities, regardless of where they live, or whether they have mobility problems or otherwise disabled. And people are more likely to work if a bit unwell because they don’t have to travel or risk infecting others. Also allows carers to more easily juggle work with their responsibilities etc.

But it’s obvs not for everyone. Like all jobs, you have to find one that suits you.

It sounds like for you it's not sustainable to stay in this job because you need the contact and the chat. That's fine. It's something you need to change to make sure your life is how you want it.

Remote working in general, which is how you've positioned it, is absolutely sustainable. That's what people are answering.

I do agree with the points about younger people though. I loved working in the office when i was younger. It has only suited me more after becoming a parent.

I know graduates left my previous company because they were lonely wfh.

I also depended on office working when i previously moved down the country for a new job and didn’t know anyone. It helped me make friends and meet my eventual DH.

So it does depend on your individual situation.

I work remotely with team days in person every 2-3 months. We are a home based team working across multiple time zones. Unless you have a role that has to be in person (80% of the client delivery teams) then you are home-based because it’s cheaper for the business. We have various staff network groups that have regular virtual catch ups on different topics.

most days I have 3-4 hours of teams meetings (including virtual coffees sometimes) and multiple teams chats and workspaces. There are people I’m friendly with who I’ve never met in person. I’ve been there 18 months

i work so much better this way than when I was dashing around on-site, working in open plan offices but still having teams meetings because some people are all over the country

my husband is 100% wfh. He’s a specialist contractor across the public sector and it would be vastly more expensive for his clients if he had to travel to them. He spends 6+ hours a day on teams calls. He has regular virtual coffees with his professional networking groups

It’s very role-dependent, company dependent and connected with your personal approach.

Of course it's horse for courses amd it works well for some. For me, I'm like you OP. I started a fully remote role recently and have been shocked at how isolated and lonely I now feel. I hate it. I love the fact that it means I am at home for my kids after school, but for me and my mental health it's been terrible. I need to find something else or figure out how to deal with the isolation. No option to go into the office - the company is 100% remote.

I feel similar. This isnt about working from home, it's the losing contact with people and not building personal relationships. I often talk to people more on teams now, in and out of teams calls, but I rarely get to see them in person. I go into my office but would never see anyone from my team. Whilst we have surface chats on team I feel that you never get to know someone as well as you would by face-to-face conversation.

I do feel for the younger generation. My colleague feels the same and mentioned that younger people wouldn't pick up how to talk to people on the phone because they aren't listening into others making calls. It's also harder to get to know others in the wider organisation

It’s the subject of your thread more than the content. Your thread title suggests you’re talking about it in the general sense / applicable to all. In the body of your OP it’s clear remote working isn’t right for you 100% of the time. You posted in AIBU, you can’t expect everyone to agree.

How odd, maybe its just where you work. I only go in 2/3 x a month and my office days are back to back with in person meetings, coffees, lunches etc. I mean of course I do organise it to be like that, although there is also always impromptu catch ups as well. I dont really encourage out of office friendships as my life is too full already, but Im sure if I were younger and wanted to I could. I think this might be a 'you' problem.

As with the Reform local councils Nige will soon discover that renting office space to accomodate all these WFH returners costs money!

This is silly. Of course lots of jobs can't be done at home (though many HCPs work from.home for telephone consultation work). If you choose to be a nurse or plumber or bus driver you know.kt won't be home.workkng.
Many people would hate to work from home (especially if living in a shared house or have kids who are at home or come home from.
school.

I wfh and go into the office once a month.

Honestly yes i am lonely. But it means i can finish on time for school pick up so the flexibility with my young kids is ideal.

I think a factor in remote working is finding good candidates for jobs and being able to look further afield from the office. People are being priced out of some areas and therefore can’t afford to live near the office base. So it can be a good advantage for the business.